Axl and I were joking the other night that we might have invented the phrase “still a thing” as applied to bands/people/trends that seem to have vanished from view but are apparently not just still around but quite popular. Only fitting then that the theme of this week’s Top Hard Music Soundscan charts is “still a thing.” I mean, the molasses-like state of inertia fixed upon modern hard rock radio and the associated bands over the past decade is just astounding to look at; nothing has changed in ten years.

Since there weren’t any notable metal debuts last week to crack the Top 100 aside from those in the Top 10, this week let’s look at all of numbers 1 through 10 on the Top Hard Music chart. Prepare to be astonished and baffled by the “still a thing”-ness of every single band.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (not really at all) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

We haven’t done one one of these all summer, but we came up with a fun one for this week:

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME AND PLAY ANY METAL BAND/MUSICIAN SOME OF THEIR MUSIC AND/OR SHOW THEM PHOTOS/VIDEOS OF THEMSELVES FROM THEIR FUTURE (OUR PRESENT), WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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A bunch of big records came out last Tuesday: Suicide Silence, Fair to Midland, Sepultura and Decapitated. After the jump we’ll take a look at how those and a few recent releases sold over the past week.

But first, a follow-up on a question I asked in last week’s column: how do the numbers for Arch Enemy’s Khaos Legions stack up against their past releases? I don’t have week-by-week breakdowns for each album to compare to Khaos Legions‘ cumulative total of 13,944 after five weeks, but these total sales figures for Arch Enemy’s best-selling albums should provide some frame of reference:

Anthems of Rebellion: 74,712
Doomsday Machine: 108,036
Rise of the Tyrant: 55,812
Wages of Sin: 71,688

With Khaos Legions falling off the charts in week six, that means they sold less than 1,092 units last week, the minimum number required to crack the Top 100 Hard Music Chart. Based on that I’d say it’s going to be a tough climb for Gossow, the Amotts and co. to match their past success this time around.

ANYWAY, back to last week’s big releases:

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So, to review the ways in bass players let us down this week:

• Coheed and Cambria’s Michael Todd robbed a pharmacy.
• Nick Oliveri from Queens of the Stone Age/Kyuss held his girlfriend hostage in a four-hour standoff with a S.W.A.T. team.
• Jeroen Paul Thessling quit Obscura.

Dave Grohl has been known time and again to be part of the endangered species known as “The Cool Rockstar.” Dude is a household name and could probably buy and sell this website and everyone who reads it ten times over, but time and again he manages to convey one simple idea — that he is awesome.

Well, he’s done it again.

And now I’m just that much more excited to see Grohl and his Foo Fighters live in September. HIGH-FIVES!

-AR

You will be happy to know that Limp Bizkit did not claim the #1 spot on the Top Hard Music charts again this week. That spot belongs to… Pop Evil. Who? Not Limp Bizkit, that’s who.

Aside from Unearth, there weren’t any notable debuts to chart last week. After the jump, a look at how the latest records from Black Dahlia Murder, In Flames, and many more fared on the marketplace of over-priced pieces of plastic and soon-to-be-obsolete digital files.

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Let’s give Axl Rosenberg a hearty golf clap for capably handling Neilstein Soundscam while I was away, shall we? But the party is over, so it’s back to the grind of boring albums selling soon-to-be insignificant pieces of plastic (and soon-to-be insignificant digital files once Spotify launches).

You should all be elated to learn that Limp Bizkit claimed the #1 spot on the Hard Music charts last week (#15 overall), so let’s all take a great big sigh of relief in knowing that good music reigns supreme.

I keed. Queensryche had a solid debut, while In Flames, Symphony X and The Black Dahlia Murder had decent second weeks despite large percentage drops. Check out the numbers for those and several others after the jump.

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Vince is still away, so, once again, “Neilstein SoundScam” is on me this week.Check out some of the more noteworthy sales stats from the latest Top Hard Music charts, including albums by Foo Fighters, Morbid Angel, Of Mice & Men, and more after the jump!

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Vince isn’t here, so I guess it falls to me to take over his regular “Neilstein SoundScam” column… BWA-HA-HA!!!

Some of the more noteworthy sales stats from the latest Top Hard Music charts after the jump!

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Red State Radio Rock reigned supreme once again last week on the increasingly meaningless Soundscam charts. Metal fans won’t find much to be happy about as none of the albums we highlighted last week charted, but there are some interesting stats about Ozzy Osbourne and others after the jump.

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Butt rock reigns yet again, with Seether nabbing the top spot for the second week in a row. Boris and Cave In cracked the Top Hard Music charts with their new albums (hooray!), while Hollywood Undead and Asking Alexandria actually experienced sales gains for the first time since their new records debuted a few weeks back (boo!). Click on through to see what else charted and how much it all sold.

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Seether are still around? Apparently they are, and apparently they still sell buttloads of records. While Seether nabbed the top spot on the Top Hard Music chart, Scar Symmetry also had a good debut, as did, um, Vampires Everywhere. Foo Fighters, Hollywood Undead, Black Label Society and others are still selling lots of records too. Numbers after the jump.

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Foo Fighters fans fretting that Wasting Light would relinquish its hold on the meaningless Soundscan charts after dropping to #2 last week after three debut weeks at #1… fret not, as Dave Grohl and co. are back up top! This week’s #2 comes in the form of a big surprise, as Zack Wylde’s Black Label Society sold a ton of copies of the acoustic equivalent of a remixes album.

Lots of interesting action elsewhere, too, with new records by Anvil and Hate Eternal making the charts, and a bunch of other strong sellers. Also: a case study in Sixx A.M. / Motley Crue chart history, another one on the myriad Aerosmith greatest hits collections selling gangbusters, and on Metallica’s Master of Puppets‘ chart legacy finally coming to an end.

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Of course when you set out to make a list like, say, the one we’re doing right now, of The Top 25 Modern Metal Guitarists, you are bound to piss a lot of people off — that just comes with the job.

But I always find it hilarious HOW those people get pissed off. For example, this week I saw a lot of complaints that the guitar players we’ve been selecting aren’t “modern.” And I can’t believe we have to fucking define the word “modern” for some of you idiots, but apparently we do. So:

So… which one of you jackasses would like to call up Alex Skolnick or Vernon Reid or Adam Jones and let them know they’re antiquated and obsolete? ‘Cause I saw Testament and Living Colour and Tool live just last year, and I would not want to make that call. Just because those dudes have been playing this game for awhile doesn’t mean their best days are behind them.

My point simply being: I don’t care if you hate our choices. That’s fine. But at least try to hate our choices based on an argument that makes sense, y’know?

And on that note, here are other ways we entertained ourselves this week:

• We debuted new music from A Pale Horse Named Death and Oakhelm.
• We checked out the latest releases from From Exile, Godstopper, and Cruachan.
• We wondered which is better, old music or new music?
• We philosophized about Google’s new cloud service.
• We fretted that metal may soon be blamed for terrorism.
• We got excited about The Faceless’ new demo.
• We bemoaned the current state of In Flames.
• We wept because Dave Grohl is not going to be on the new Mastodon album after all.
• We enjoyed a vegetarian cooking lesson from a dude in corpse paint.
• We questioned the logic of the new Avenged Sevenfold video.

Next week we unveil numbers fifteen through eleven on our guitar player list; the average age of those five musicians is thirty-one, whereas the average age of this week’s selections was forty-two. So maybe you can go back to being upset because you think they suck, not because you think they’re too old to be “modern.”

-AR

The Foo Fighters and Hollywood Undead were finally toppled from their respective #1 and #2 spots last week after holding down the fort in that order for three straight weeks prior (with Hollywood Undead at #1 the week before Foo Fighters’ debut), but rest assured, they’re still at #2 and #3 and show no signs of letting up. Nikki Sixx’s new Sixx A.M. record nabbed the top spot on the Hard Music Charts this week, undoubtedly due to this record-shifting post.

Elsewhere, Shinedown debuted their new live album, another Poison greatest hits collection flopped, and some other bands sold some records too. The numbers:

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Well, this news is a real boner-killer.

Last week we got all excited because the above photo of Dave Grohl in the studio with Mastodon appeared online, and, of course, all of our minds went right to “DAVE GROHL IS GONNA MAKE AN APPEARANCE ON THE NEW MASTODON ALBUM!”

Alas, it’s not to be, says Rocksound.tv, who got official word from Camp Mastodon that “the Foo Fighters frontman popped into the studio to say hello – and not to record on the new album.”

So that blows.

Bitch and moan that everything doesn’t go exactly the way we want it to with us in the comments section.

-AR

[via The PRP]

So we’re now five axe slingers deep into out list of The Top 25 Modern Metal Guitarists. We predicted that the list would get a lot of you angry, and, no shock, it has. Funny thing is, reading the comments, as of yet not one of you has correctly predicted which guitar player is gonna be #1. So, just lettin’ you know… you may be even angrier in the coming weeks, or maybe you’ll be less angry, but so far, it seems like you guys just do not see it comin’.

While you chew on that, here’s some other fun things we did this week:

• We premiered new music from Hate Eternal, Arch Enemy, and Nader Sadek.
• We enjoyed a new episode of “Cooking Contaminated,” this one featuring King Fowley of Deceased.
• We checked out the latest releases from Benighted and Zubrowska.
• We wondered if Metallica and friends have gone too far in their quest for the Big Fortune.
• We checked out some *real* hardcore.
• We weighed Donald Trump’s claim that President Obama was the first drummer for Overkill.
• We wondered why talent can’t be passed down via genetics.
• We weighed, compared and contrasted multiple metal concerts showcasing female-fronted bands.
• We prayed for Kurt Cobain to rise from his grave and off Miley Cyrus.
• We wondered whether or not Dave Grohl is gonna be on the new Mastodon album.

And so, in conclusion… I am going to get a slice of pizza now.

See ya next week.

-AR

I heard about, and then completely ignored, this photo album of Mastodon recording their new album. Why did I completely ignore it? Because I’ve seen bands record albums. It looks like dudes standing in a studio playing instruments. And unless you’re dealing with a band who haven’t recorded together in a very, very, very long time, well… that’s not too exciting. So these kinds of shots in and of themselves are usually not very cool.

Well, I’m an idiot. If I had looked, I might have seen this pic of Dave Grohl in the studio with the band:

Instead, I had to read about it on Heavy Blog is Heavy. D’oh!

ANYWAY, let us now analyze this photograph into, ahem, oblivion.

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In the absence of any big metal debuts, this week I decided to run with a question posed last week: how does Amon Amarth’s current chart-buster Surtur Rising stack up against their past releases? After the jump, a look at those numbers.

Foo Fighters were #1 and Hollywood Undead were #2 for the third week in a row on the Top Hard Music charts; elsewhere, Otep Shamaya had a nice debut and shitstains on the ass of the universe like Winds of Plague and Asking Alexandria also had solid weeks. Whoopie.

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The Foo Fighters are #1 for the 2nd week in a row; I have yet to hear Wasting Light but everything Dave Grohl puts out is quality and the two songs I’ve heard so far are both slam dunks. Conversely, Hollywood Undead are #2 for the second week in a row; can’t win ‘em all, I guess, but at least they’re not #1.

Elsewhere Winds of Plague, Periphery and Loaded had solid debuts, while pretty much any band that was on Revolver’s Golden Gods Awards show experienced a nice little sales bump. Numbers after the fold.

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