When word reached Lady Gaga last year that she’d been described by Ozzy Osbourne as ”very clever, very interesting,” “wacky,” and in possession of a likable zaniness, the pop singer expressed her joy by calling herself Black Sabbath’s biggest fan “in the world.” Um, yeah that’s a patent and insulting falsehood, but shit, no worries cuz flattery from an icon like Ozzy might lead to excited overstatement in response. Shit, I’d be fuckin’ pumped if Bill Ward and I liked the same cereal. So yeah.

And really it’d even be spazworthy for most if similar praise came from somebody like Monster Magnet maestro Dave Wyndorf, as it did for Lady Gaga on MetalSucks back in November. Though hmm I doubt she was similarly flattered by an aged metal drummer fop’s invite to a groping, which occured this weekend when the Iron Maiden tour shared a venue with Lady Gaga’s in Tampa, Florida. A few days before that, McBrain told an about-to-be totally nauseated interviewer:

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I’m at the point where I pretty much prefer animated movies to live-action ones. I passed up some big deal, hotshot movie that came out recently, whose name I don’t even remember, to see Rango. I’m usually a pretty good judge, too, because I knew Rango was going to be awesome ,and it was. It looks absolutely amazing, and if you’re a nerd for animation detail, the gross, crusty animals will thrill you. Not to mention the classic movie references from Chinatown to Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas. It’s also damn violent for a “kids movie.” And well, I’m a movie nerd with a deep love for filmic violence. My dad didn’t have any sons, ok? He raised me to love his Fab Four; Arnold, Bruce, Sylvester, and Jean-Claude. And Dolph, on days he felt generous.

This might be odd, but I always liked to think about what various characters’ personalities would be like. Down to their music and movie taste. I especially try to pick out the metalheads, because I want to find my animated brothers and sisters in arms. It was while musing on the subject on Twitter that I found out the talented Ms. Elise over at Reign in Blonde kind of does the same thing. Apparently, all my acquaintances are online these days. She actually compiled a list of the most metal Disney characters, and with her help, I’ve expanded the list. Here are the Ten Most Likely Metalheads in Animated Movies (excluding anime and other international releases, as the author has not done enough research on the subject.)

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So Iron Maiden were playing in Rio de Janeiro on Sunday night, and the fans got so frickin’ excited that they surged forth to the point where they broke right through the barricade that was supposed to separate them from the band (video below). And I gotta say, I’ve been right up against the barricade at some big shows, and it can definitely be an intense experience (I have literally left a gig with a bruise line across my ribs/chest), but HOLY CRAP THIS LOOKS SCARY.

The band, needless to say, had to stop the show, and though they initially thought they’d be able to return to the stage after the barricade was repaired, it soon became clear that said repair was easier said than done, and the concert was postponed until the following evening. Which was menschy of the band — I mean, they could’ve just cancelled altogether — but it kinda sucks for the poor fans who had already done who only knows what (waited on line for countless hours, adjusted schedules, destroyed a barricade, etc.) to be at that show. But what sucks worse is that Maiden were only part-way through their opening song of the night when the incident occurred. And what sucks even worse is that that opening song was the title track from The Final Frontier, so it’s not even like fans got to hear something good before they had to call it an early night.

-AR

[via Metal Insider]

Grayceon‘s recent Profound Lore release, All We Destroy, is an album that’s more that worthy of your attention: cellist (!!!)/vocalist Jackie Perez Gratz (who’s also a member of Giant Squid, and has played with Agalloch, Om, and a bunch of other killer bands), finger-pickin’ guitarist Max Doyle, and a drummer Zack Farwell have created an album that’s as haunting and emotional as it is heavy. The top-notch songcraft, combined with Perez Gratz’s ghostly vocals and elegiac cello playing, ensure that there is truly no other band that sounds like Grayceon in the modern metal scene. And that fact increasingly seems to be a miracle.

Grayceon are playing three shows at SXSW this week — you can get all the details here — so now seemed like an ideal time to e-mail Perez Gratz some irritating questions. Luckily for us, she seems to have a good sense of humor.

After the jump, read all of Perez Gratz’s thoughts on the cello, the songwriting process for Grayceon, the cello, the lyrical themes of All We Destroy, the cello, Revolver‘s “Hottest Chicks in Metal” issue, the cello, the ukulele, and the cello.

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Sure, it’s been a shitty week for Kvelertak and their stateside fans: We reported Saturday that the Norwegian scream-rockers got separated from vital travel documents right before departure for their first-ever US tour dates (including the MetalSucks co-presented SXSW super-jam). That bums me out cuz duh those fuckerz jam (which is good for concertgoers), but moreso because I was pumped for the band’s imminent chance to, like, collect on their roaring buzz here (which is good for them). Okay sorry about that mixed metaphor. But the point is that if I were a member of Kvelertak (please can I be a member of Kvelertak?), I’d want to further enable American rockers to pony up some cash for the record that about a billion of us have possessed/loved for months ahead of its proper US release. All is not lost cuz a bonus track-laden US version of Kvelertak still drops Tuesday, but I can’t help but lament the fact that a string of ballsack-singeing live sets would’ve cranked open a lot more wallets a lot wider. And deservedly so.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

This week’s query was suggested by our very own Anso DF…

IF YOU HAD THE POWER TO GIFT A RECORD TO EVERY ACTIVE MUSIC LISTENER IN THE WORLD, WHICH RECORD WOULD IT BE AND WHY?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

I’m selfish/insensitive enough that, when it was announced last November that King Diamond was hospitalized for triple bypass surgery, my first thought was, “Oh shit, now we’ll never get Mercyful Fate in the Hall of Fame.” You know, as opposed to, “Oh shit, I hope this human being who has entertained and captivated metal fans for over a quarter-century is okay, much less his loving family.” No, being an asshole isn’t easy. One has to work at it. Anyway, everything more or less turned out okay—not only was the great Dane discharged in December to recuperate at home, but we had already conducted two-fifths of the required interviews to make a Melissa feature a reality, King being among them. Hence, a pretty colorful, totally essential feature for April. Oh, and if you prefer King Diamond the band’s classic ghost tales, stay tuned for a very special black horseman’s arrival in a dB somewhere down the line.

Back to Melissa, though. Its induction opens up a familiar Pandora’s box. Most fans argue that—not unlike Venom’s Welcome to Hell and Black Metal—Melissa and sophomore sensation Don’t Break the Oath are equally ripping. Our contention is that Melissa has the more memorable set of tunes, and that most Oath-swearing is due to the fact that the LP afforded Mercyful Fate reams of exposure via their first U.S. tour. And not that this contributes all that much to said debate, but Decibel EIC Albert Mudrian, as big a Maiden apologist as—well, that’s not true; some of our staff writers are even more nuts—but whatever: he contends that Leyton’s finest ripped off the main riff to Fate’s “Curse of the Pharaohs” on Powerslave hit “2 Minutes to Midnight.” More food for your skull. What do you think?

-AB

You can buy the April 2011 issue of Decibel here, or just get a full subscription to ensure that you never miss an awesome Hall of Fame entry.

Andy McCoy, one of the founding members of Hanoi Rocks, wrote a book. In 2008. [Our own Corey Mitchell reviewed it in 2010. - Ed.] I read it pretty recently as it came to me with a bunch of Christmas/Hannukah/New Year’s loot. My family doesn’t celebrate anything, so we basically give each other presents because the year is over. Yeah, I don’t know. We put up a tree, too.

Anyway, I kind of dropped the ball on Andy, and that’s kind of a recurring thing these days, because every once in a while I get caught up on that “having a life thing.” I did finally read it, though, and I quite enjoyed it. To an extent. Now, I love books. Reading = fun times for me. I usually have three or four books I’m juggling and one of them is almost always a music biography. But Sherriff McCoy; Outlaw Legend of Hanoi Rocks goes on the pile of band books that really could’ve used a good edit.

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Round Two of Heavy Metal Blunders brings us, who else? Vince Neil! Yes, the official MS Mansion punching monkey got shipped off to the can last week. At this point, I don’t really care. But I did get a chuckle out of his girlfriend, Alicia Jacobs, who was concerned for her bank account, err… boyfriend. Jacobs claimed Neil was “not eating much other than peanut butter, Doritos and stuff like that. He had a baloney sandwich one day. It’s not optimal conditions.” I wonder what Razzle thinks about dem apples?

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There’s a powerfully bittersweet scene in the Iron Maiden documentary Flight 666 in which a Costa Rican metalhead spends a few post-entry/pre-show moments lamenting the misfortune of Third World metalheads. He states:

When I was like 14 or 15, I heard Iron Maiden for the first time. [I thought,] ‘Oh, this is amazing! I-ron Maiden! Can you just imagine to see them live? Oh, [what a] shame — we live in the ass of the world.’ … [So, today's concert] is once in a lifetime! I have a friend who quit his job to be here today!

Though the show is hours away, the guy’s voice cracks with emotion and his gestures signify rising euphoria. He’s happy for himself and and those like him who waited most of their lives for the chance to see Maiden pound “the ass of the world” later that night. Intense, right? Now, swap out Maiden for the Deftones, Costa Rica for Thailand, and a full-tilt ass-pounding for a 90-minute delay followed by an outright cancellation. Yeah, then swap out euphoria for angry rioting:

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…Iron Maiden, for the song “El Dorado,” and Them Crooked Vultures, for the song “SERIOUSLY WHO GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THEM CROOKED VULTURES YOU OLD FAT FILTHY FUCKS?”

So the thing is, if you look up the word “meaningless” in the dictionary, you will find a picture of a Grammy. There’s really no reason to be bummed about this. And while I don’t think “El Dorado” is a very good song, I’m glad that Maiden won as opposed to, say, Korn. Actually, I would have been okay with any of the nominees that weren’t Korn winning.

But for Them Crooked Vultures — or, really, any of the bands that weren’t Alice in Chains — to win just proves what a joke these awards are. I don’t even feel like I have to type anything else to prove my point — just the words “Them Crooked Vultures” should make you automatically say through your yawn, “Next!”

-AR

Paul Di’Anno — the former Iron Maiden singer who once compared Steve Harris to Adolf Hitler — just keeps getting smarter and smarter.

His latest staggering act of genius? He claimed benefits of £45,000 — close to $72,000 — after allegedly suffering nerve damage in his back, which was said to have prevented him from working between 2002 and 2008. Fair enough, except that investigators received an anonymous tip (Harris taking revenge, perhaps?) that Di’Anno had, in fact, been performing during that time period. So these investigators, y’know, investigated, and found online videos of him not just singing, but apparently jumping and running around on stage — things he couldn’t do if his back was really in such terrible shape.

But here’s the kicker: THE VIDEOS WERE POSTED ON DI’ANNO’S OWN WEBSITE AND YOUTUBE PAGE.

What.

A fucking.

Moron.

Di’Anno has apparently admitted to screwing taxpayers out of that money, and a judge has told him to expect prison time when he’s sentenced on March 11. I have no idea what the penalty is for insurance fraud in the U.K., but I’m hoping it’s steep. Because this twit has no one to blame for himself. Fuck Iron Maiden; he should just join The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight and get it over with.

-AR

[via The Daily Mail]

Invisible Oranges reminds us that yesterday marked the thirtieth anniversary of the release of Iron Maiden’s sophomore album (and final release with vocalist Paul Di’Anno), Killers.

When reached for comment, Killers told MetalSucks, “Holy shit, dude, I can’t believe I’m thirty. Where did my twenties go? There’s so much I wanted to do that I didn’t get to… I think I’m having a quarter-life crisis.” We tried to reassure Killers that its thirties would be better than its twenties, as it became more self-confident and aware of its abilities and its place in the world, but all it said in reply was, “Easy for you to say, dude, you’re not another year closer to death!”

Geez. For an album with a dude getting butchered on the cover, Killers sure is a whiny pussy.

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Every now and then you hear about a miracle. I’m not talking about, like, your dad surviving some emergency surgery or anything as circumstantial as that — no no no, I mean a true, honest-to-God miracle, like someone saw Jesus on their toast, or The Virgin Mary in their coffee. It’s moments like these that make you know there really is a Higher Power, and that life has some meaning to it after all.

Well, reader Michael LaGrow has experienced just such a miracle, and he even sent us photographic evidence to prove it. For Michael has a dirt stain on his wall… that looks just like Eddie. Check it out (click on the picture to embiggen):

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The #4 album in the country last week came from Social Distortion, yet that album failed to register on the “Top Hard Music” chart I usually cover in this column where it would’ve been #1 by a long shot. I mean, I know Social Distortion aren’t exactly splitting eardrums anymore, but come on, Mike fucking Ness! Bizarre? Yeah, but this is the music industry we’re dealing with, the same group of retardos who regularly send us MP3s for review without any artist, label or track name labels whatsoever and who make us jump through flaming hoops to download them. So, surprising? Not at all.

Anyway, let’s look at said Social Distortion-omitting Top Hard Music chart for the week ending January, 25th, 2011. The new Times of Grace project featuring ex-Killswitch Engage vocalist Jesse Leach and current KsE guitarist Adam D. charted respectably in its debut, but there wasn’t a whole lot else out there in the metal world that was big enough to chart in its debut week (aside from Electric Wizard) despite a decent list of new albums. As such, there’s a lot of greatest hits packages leftover from the holiday rush showing up on the charts (Aerosmith, Ozzy, Van Halen, etc) and perennial butt-rock sellers like Nickelback, Disturbed, Three Days Grace, Breaking Benjamin, etc. Let’s take a look at a few notable releases:

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Admit it: this picture makes you SO FUCKING HAPPY.

Recently, my friend sent me a YouTube link to a Bee Gees cover group. Excuse me, tribute band. That is the proper way of addressing them, as Mark Wahlberg taught us in Rock Star. I don’t like the Bee Gees. I don’t like disco. Disco is kind of terrible. Disco blows dogs for quarters. Disco is never amazing, especially not when KISS attempt it. To say I was a little confused would be an understatement. But my friends aren’t totally clueless to what I listen to, so I gave it a shot. It turned out it was a heavy metal Bee Gees tribute band. Okay, it was a little bit awesome. Weirdly enough, it worked. I only like thin-voiced men screeching when accompanied by equally high-pitched guitars, and that’s basically what heavy metal “Stayin’ Alive,” was. I turned it off about halfway through because, well, I still have my limits, but it kind of makes you stop and go, “Huh!” Metal just makes everything sound better.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

Last week we asked you, oh beloved readers, to suggest some QOTW, and there were actually a number of good queries posited. So we kinda just picked one at random, and then we’ll do some others in the coming weeks. In the meantime, this week’s question, from Tim, is:

WHAT ALBUM ORIGINALLY GOT YOU INTO METAL?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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I like music videos. I don’t mean just lame concert footage videos either. (I get it, Band, you can play your instruments like, really well. In front of people!) No, I mean the amazing, overblown, explosions and nonsensical storylines, holy shit is that a cameo by jailbait Keri Russell in bra?!, looks like it was directed by Michael Bay, epic mini-movies. In fact, Meat Loaf’s, “I Would Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That),” has pretty much all of the aforementioned, except one. I won’t say which one, just look it up*. It is the most amazing seven minutes ever.  Except for the part where he prays to the god of, “Sex, and drums, and rock’n’roll.” Come on, now, you’re not fooling anyone.

The other night I couldn’t sleep. So I ended up watching music videos until the sun came up. I did not have a good day that day. Of course, I watched metal videos. (Okay fine, like half were Meat Loaf videos. He kind of hovers on the periphery of metal, right? He was in Rocky Horror Picture Show, he played a totally awesome biker named Eddie! Isn’t his daughter married to Scott Ian? Fringes, he’s on the fringes. Shut up, Meat Loaf is awesome. Even more so when I can’t type and write “Meat Load.” Good job proof-reading at 5:40 a.m.)

Videos were my first introduction to many bands. They were like trailers for records, and the more confusing and “deep” they were, the more interested I got. I’m not saying there are no good videos anymore, but I just can’t believe we live in a time where it’s no longer cool to shred shirtless on a cliff while your bandmate gets married but then it starts raining and the bride is dead and Axl Rose is swimming with dolphins while Stephanie Seymour beats up a girl in a bar. I mean, maybe it’s a good thing bands don’t go bankrupt after videos anymore. and the Guns N’ Roses trilogy more than borders on the ridiculous (Hi Shannon Hoon! I see you, there on the roof!) but let’s take a look at some that kind of stuck with me.

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“I used to be the singer for Iron Maiden!”

I’ll keep this brief, because it’s the very definition of “self-explanatory.” I mean, it might be one of those “I’m  [insert minority here] so I’m allowed to use the word ‘[insert slanderous term here]‘” things, but my gut tells me it’s really just one of those “I’m not very smart things.”

So. Paul Di’Anno, 2009:

“But you need to take drugs when you’re with Iron Maiden because they’re so fucking boring.”

And Paul Di’Anno, 2010:

“Anyone who slags off on Maiden, I’ll punch them out.”

In conclusion, I very much look forward to watching Paul Di’Anno punch himself out.

-AR

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

This week’s question was once again suggested by “Hipsters Out of Metal!” columnist Anso DF, and even though the Grammy nominations were actually announced last week, it still seemed like a fun debate to have. So:

WHAT ARE YOUR NOMINATIONS FOR BEST METAL GRAMMY?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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