Through amazing mind-reading technology created by the MetalSucks Mansion Monkey affectionately known as “You Worthless Retard,” MetalSucks was exclusively able to listen-in on Joey Belladonna’s most private thoughts while he contemplated whether or not to return to Anthrax.* What follows is a transcript of those thoughts…

Okay, Joey. Now, let’s be rational. Let’s think this all the way through. Let’s not make any brash decisions this time.

I mean, these dudes have not been cool to me. Remember when they fired me in 1992 for no apparent reason? And they hired me back to do that reunion tour. And then they, uh, y’know. Fired me again. And this time, I found out about it over the internet. They weren’t even good enough to give me a phone call! And then Scott and Charlie talked an awful lot of shit about me in the press, and said that I should “Grow up and be a man. Take responsibility for your life.” And I had, like, no idea what they were talking about. Just a couple of months ago, Scott made fun of me on television! I kinda think it might be because the reunion was less financially successful than we’d hoped. But I don’t really know, ’cause I never actually spoke to them about it.

And now they wanna hire me back! Again! And they want me to sing some other dude’s parts on a new album, without actually contributing anything myself! And the guy is some kid they hired because when John Bush showed a little backbone and refused to come back to the band after I was re-fired, they decided they’d rather work with pretty much anyone but me. Actually, they decided they’d rather work with Corey Taylor than me. But Corey’s business manager had more sense than that, and then they decided they’d rather work with pretty much anyone but me. The nerve!

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I know it’s unusual for us to post about one particular piece of news twice in the same day, but it seems like there’s fuck-all happening this afternoon, and I just this on Blabbermouth, and it is SO GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING HILARIOUS that I just had to say something about it. It’s a segment from VH1′s That Metal Show (which, I admit, I’ve never actually seen before) that aired in March (and was filmed in January). It’s a “Belladonna Vs. Bush” debate, that includes Scott Ian and his wife, Pearl Aday (a.k.a. “Meatloaf’s Daughter.”)

Needless to say, Mr. and Mrs. Ian both side with Bush – in fact, with regards to the Belladonna-Bush switch, Scott even goes so far as to say, “We didn’t need a bird, we needed a lion.”

And this just proves my point: regardless of whether or not you agree with Vince and myself that John Bush r00lz and Joey Belladonna dr00lz, there’s no arguing that they went back to Belladonna for any reason other than they had no choice. This is not some grand artistic move meant to do what was best for the band as a creative entity; it’s a last-ditch act of desperation. Sad, sad, sad.

-AR

Well, this was some shitty news to get first thing in the morning.

Just last week we heard rumors that Anthrax was swapping out John Bush for Joey Belladonna again – and now those rumors are fact. Belladonna will play the “Big Four” shows Sonisphere Festival shows and a handful of other gigs with the band starting next month; immediately thereafter, according to the official press release, “the band will fly back to the U.S. and begin writing and rehearsing for a new album that’s expected to be out in early 2011.”

(And in case you’re wondering, Dan Spitz isn’t returning to the fold, because I guess he’s too busy changing the face of music forever with his revolutionary new project, DeuxMonkey. So, at least for now, Rob Caggiano’s job is safe.)

I hate just cutting and pasting press releases, but for the sake of us all having the same amount of information before I start my little rant, I’m going to re-print a portion of said release after the jump. My holier-than-thou ramblings will follow.

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A few hours ago authorities evacuated Times Square for the second time in a week after someone found a “suspicious cooler” on the street. Of course, everyone was just being overly cautious, but as long as it doesn’t infringe on my civil rights, there’s nothing necessarily wrong with that. I think Vince was in Michigan when 9/11 went down, but I was here, and if I never see another tank rolling down my street again or run all over the city because there’s no cell service and I need to make sure that all of my friends and family are still alive, well, I’ll be good.

While I nurse my PTSD, here are some happier, metalier things that happened this week:

• We’re streaming Keep of Kalessin’s new album, Reptilian. We also debuted new music by Lamb of God and The Funeral Pyre.
• We also also also debuted new videos by Soulfly and Cancer Bats.
• We also also also also debuted our new cooking show, Cooking Contaminated.
• Cynic’s Paul Masvidal discussed the shape of silence, Periphery’s Bulb taught you how to get that “big” studio tone, As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa had some questions about L O S T, Matt from Rumpelstiltskin Grinder fondly recalled Maryland Deathfest, and Batillus bassist Willi Stabenau gave us a studio update.
• We talked to Darkest Hour’s Mike Schleibaum, Reign Supreme’s Jay Pepito,  Jackyl’s Jesse James Dupree, and unveiled part one of our massive two-part interview with Buzz Osborne.
• We checked out the latest release by The Howling Wind.
• Does the fact that Mike Portnoy is touring with Avenged Sevenfold make you wanna see ‘em?
• We don’t want Joey Belladonna to return to Anthrax. Seriously.
• Sergeant D. wants to know if u mosh 4 Christ???
• Damnocracy’s Evan Seinfeld and his porno Howdy Doody also do bar mitzvahs.
• We wish there was really such a thing as a Slayer burrito.

Next week brings even more betterer br00tal goodness – interviews, debuts, guest blogs, all that shit. It’s gonna get real up in this bitch. See ya then.

-AR

The other day this rumor started to spread that Joey Belladonna is reuniting with Anthrax yet again, and I expressed displeasure. And a lot of you expressed displeasure with my displeasure. And there seemed to be some confusion over why I actually dislike Joey B. So I thought I’d try to present a semi-rational argument explaining why I so greatly prefer John Bush.

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What. A. Douche.

Excuse me if there are a lotta typos in this post – it’s hard to see the monitor through my tears. Why am I weeping as I type this? Because I just read the following on Blabbermouth:

Former ANTHRAX singer Joey Belladonna was seen with ANTHRAXdrummer Charlie Benante and bassist Frank Bello this past Wednesday (April 28) at the FOZZY concert at B.B. King Blues Club & Grill in New York City, prompting speculation that he is in talks to rejoin the band in time for the group’s upcoming “Big Four” shows in Europe withMETALLICA, MEGADETH and SLAYER. (Belladonna lives in upstate New York while Benante is a Chicago resident, making it somewhat unlikely that this was simply a chance encounter.)

Oh dear sweet God, I’m sorry I ever doubted your existence. Please stop punishing me. Please please please make it so Joey Belladonna is going nowehre near fucking Anthrax ever again. Unless it’s the disease and not the band, in which case, y’know. Rock on.

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Like a lot of people, I first became familiar with Brian Posehn because of his time on David Cross and Bob Odenkirk’s brilliant HBO sketch comedy series, Mr. Show, for which he was also a writer. A few years after that show went off the air, my then-roommate and I went to see Posehn do some stand-up at a comedy club here in New York. I don’t think we were even there to see Posehn specifically – if memory serves, David Cross was the actual draw for us – but he was so funny that I actually laughed so hard I became winded and fell out of my chair. Since then, he’s been on a very, very short list of stand-ups that I never miss the chance to check out when they come through town. Mr. Show sketches about a fictional band called “Titannica” led me to believe that someone on the series’ writing staff was a metal fan, but I didn’t know that it was Posehn until later – and the revelation that he was just as obsessed with metal as I was only made him that much cooler.

Fart and Wiener Jokes, Posehn’s second album for Relapse, comes out today (and you can order a copy here). Like its predecessor, Live: In Nerd Rage, it features not only recordings of his brilliant stand-up, but also an original song he co-wrote with Anthrax’s Scott Ian (“More Metal Than You”) to poke fun at some of metal’s more regrettable foibles. It also has a metal cover of Kenny Rogers’ “The Gambler,” and between the two music tracks, Posehn has managed to rope in guest appearances by such all-stars as Jamey Jasta, Mark Morton, Mark Oseguenda, John Tempesta, and Russ Parrish. Assuming you love great comedy and great metal, there’s no way you’re not gonna dig Fart and Wiener Jokes.

A few weeks ago I got to talk to Posehn about putting comedy albums out on a metal label, what it’s like to be friends with some of his boyhood heroes, the state of metal today, his take on the Anthrax vocalist situation, and more. He even turned the tables at the end and asked me a question! Read the complete transcript of our chat after the jump.

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It must be an interesting time to be John Bush. Armored Saint have just released La Raza, their first album in a decade – and its rightfully being met with cheers of “It was worth the wait!” from critics and fans alike. Meanwhile, last year he re-joined Anthrax after more than four years away, and, it would seem, is now back with the band for good. Given that he was pretty much absent from the scene altogether during those years, this sudden abundance of new output can only be good news for the John Bush fans of the world – like us!

Last week I got to talk to to Bush about getting back together with Armored Saint after all this time, the writing process for La Raza, whether or not the band has any plans to tour, and what exactly is going on with Anthrax (the answer may surprise you – it looks like we may get to hear at least some of a Bushful of Worship Music after all, despite what some other members of the band have said in the press). Read the full transcript of our chat after the jump.

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THE ANTHRAX SAGA CONTINUES!

So. If you’re just joining us, here’s the story thus far: Anthrax decided to do a reunion tour with Joey Belladonna, but when they got off the road everyone in the band came to their senses and was like, “Wait, what? We’re not making an album with Joey Belladonna!” But John Bush was all, “You can’t fuck another girl and then ask me to the prom,” so Anthrax needed to get a new singer. They hired this dude no one has ever heard of named Dan Nelson and recorded a new album, Worship Music, which they assured us was going to be the second-coming. But then all of sudden Nelson was out of the band, either because he quit or was fired, depending on who you believe. And then they got John Bush to agree to tour with them again. And now everyone is all, “Is Bush in the band or what?” and Anthrax is all “Fingers crossed!”, which isn’t very reassuring.

On top of all of this, it has now been six and half years since the release of Anthrax’s last album, We’ve Come for You All. The last time anyone waited this long for a new record by an allegedly not-defunct band, it was Chinese Democracy.

Difference is, we finally got to hear Chinese Democracy, and now it looks like we’ll probably never hear Worship Music - at least, not in any official capacity.

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So apparently Ozzfest is coming back this summer, and is coming back as a traveling tour again (as opposed to the one-off fest it was in 2008). And that’s all well and good, only… who’s gonna be on the bill?

Mayhem, which is basically Ozzfest 2.0, has already scooped up a lot of big-name bands for the summer, including many who have played multiple past Ozzfests – namely Korn, Rob Zombie, Lamb of God, Atreyu, Shadows Fall and Hatebreed, the latter of whom I think have been on something like 90% of all Ozzfests ever.

Add to that other Ozzfest alum like Chimaira, In This Moment and Norma Jean, and some bands the kids today all seem to like, such as Winds of Plague and They Who Shall Not Be Named, and, well, that’s a whole bunch of potential mainstage and second stage draws right there.

Then there’s the mini-fests like Summer Slaughter. I can’t tell you which bands we already know are booked for some of these tours without betraying a lot of people’s confidence, but I can tell you that some great bands are now no longer available for Ozzfest.

And, oh yeah, Megadeth, Slayer, and Testament are now doing their American Carnage tour in the summer, so they’re out.

So who’s left? After the jump, I’m going to play my favorite game: it’s called “over-think about something incredibly unimportant.”

Before we proceed, it’s worth noting that I’m going to try and be semi-realistic when moving forward with some barely-educated guesses about who’ll be playing Ozzfest. If a band already has summer tour dates booked, I’m going to assume they’re not avail, although I acknowledge that they could cancel those dates in favor of playing for a bigger crowd. And I’m not even going to bother with bands like Pig Destroyer, Sigh, and Salome – bands that will play Ozzfest right around the time Joey Belladonna’s solo band plays four sold-out headlining shows at Giants Stadium. Also, obviously not all of these bands are gonna end up on the bill – these are just bands I think could end up there.

And so, without further bullshit…

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While some of us schmucks were sitting around waiting to see whether or not John Bush was gonna re-join Anthrax or what, Armored Saint went off and recorded their first new album in a decade:  La Raza, which the always reliable authorities at Wikipedia tell me “literally means in the Spanish language ‘the race’ or generally and symbolically “‘the people,’” will be out March 16 on Metal Blade. A new song, “Left Hook From Right Field,” is now streaming here.

I was never as big of an Armored Saint fan as I probably oughta be, but I think this track is pretty rockin’. It bodes well for the rest of the album. And if nothing else, it’s always great to hear John Bush singing, as opposed, I dunno, being the voice of Burger King.

Meanwhile, we still have no idea what, if anything, a new Armored Saint album means for Bushthrax. The latest issue of Decibel – y’know, the one with the now-dead American Carnage tour on the cover? – makes it sound like Bush is definitely re-recording Dan Nelson’s vocals for Worship Music. So is he gonna tour with both bands? Pull a Zakk Wylde and play twice a night? Or is one of these bands about to get the short shrift? I guess we’ll find out…

-AR

Obviously, my headline is a little sensationalistic. We waited a decade and a half for Chinese Democracy; it’s only been six (almost seven) years since the last Anthrax studio album, We’ve Come for You All. And wile CD apparently cost somewhere in neighborhood of $13 million dollars… well, I don’t know what the budget was/is on Worship Music, but I’m guessing Anthrax wouldn’t know $13 million dollars if it pooped in their eye.

Still, Chinese Democracy – which was finally released almost exactly one year ago – is the closest corollary I can think of to Worship Music, which is starting to reach mythological status.

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While the members of Anthrax continue to try and convince the world that John Bush is definitely returning to the fold, Mr. Bush continues to pursue a new studio album with Armored Saint – and now video footage of them in the studio has emerged.

What that means is that there will be a new Armored Saint album – and presumably a tour – in 2010. Even though I think it’s looking better and better than Bush will indeed return to Anthrax, he continues to decline to make a firm commitment, and this video serves as a reminder that he has other priorities, too. Because while he’s not actually in this video, I’d be very surprised if he turned around and just left the band high n’ dry – that’s the kind of thing the members of Anthrax do to him, not the kind of thing he does to other dudes.

-AR

Just last week Vince called for John Bush and Anthrax to stop pussyfooting around and just announce that Bush is 100% back in the band already; now it seems clear that that announcement hasn’t come because absolutely no one in the Anthrax camp has any fucking clue what the fucking fuck is going on with their band.

Let’s look at some quotes from just the past three days, shall we?

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Anthrax’s courting of John Bush is just going to drag on and on, isn’t it? It’s like Anthrax are reconnecting with an estranged ex-girlfriend on whom they’ve cheated, getting together to talk — or maybe to make out a little bit — time after time to rebuild trust. Won’t they just fuck and get it over with already? They know the sex was much better with their ex.

To be fair, John Bush was definitely wronged, whatwith how the band handled the whole Joey Crapadonna reunion. I can understand if Bush needs to go one step at a time.

But Scott Ian posted a video on Twitter of the band performing the classic “Only” at this past weekend’s Loud Park festival in Japan, and it’s great. The video was presumably shot by a roadie or tech, as it’s from the side/back of the stage.The band sounds good and it looks like they’re having fun. Won’t they just get together and fuck, full on penis-in-vagina already? It seems inevitable. They already have 5 dates on the books for Australia’s Soundwave festival in February/March. For how long will this courtship continue?

-VN

UPDATE: Directly from Megaforce: “No truth to it.” Sorry, kids.

Reader Greg Heerdt has helpfully pointed out that Amazon is now listing an October 20, 2009 release date for Anthrax’s Worship Music (or, at least, some import version of Worship Music - the previously announced European release date was October 23). I’ve reached out to the band’s label, Megaforce, to see if there’s any truth to the date or not…

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Yesterday, Scott Ian tweeted a response to Kerry King’s accusation that Anthrax have “been in pieces for quite some time.” The tweet pointed towards a recent, possible one-off reunion show with John Bush; I eagerly hoped it was a sign that Bush is coming back to the band for good.

Well, we still don’t know if he is or not. But we do know that he’s gonna do another gig with the ‘Thrax, this time at the Loud Park festival in Japan this October. (Interestingly enough, Slayer and Megadeth are also on the bill.)

I take that as a good sign that Bush is, indeed, negotiating (or something) to re-join Anthrax. But obviously we need to wait for some kind of official confirmation from the group.

Fingers crossed…

-AR

Presumably in response to Kerry King’s claim that “There’s better options than Anthrax [for a tour mate] and that’s nothing against Anthrax, but they’ve just been in pieces for quite some time and that doesn’t make as much sense to me,” Ian tweets:

“Guess Kerry missed Sonisphere”

Does that mean John Bush is back for good? Pretty please with a cherry on top?

This tour is never fucking happening.

-AR

Here at the MS Mansion we make no apologies about being staunch John Bush supporters. Way before the current Dan Nelson fracas, way back in the prebuscent MetalSucks days of March 2007, we wrote an open letter to John Bush encouraging him to come back into the fold. We even accidentally started a rumor that ex-Ugly Kid Joe frontman Whitfield Crane would be a suitable Bush replacement, and nearly shit our pants when it was rumored that Corey Taylor was up for the job (remember that?)… but there’s no Bush like the real Bush. Needless to say we were beyond stoked when Bush rejoined the band for a few European gigs last month.

Friend O’ MetalSucks and fellow John Bush-supporter Carlos Ramirez has compiled a list for Noisecreep of the Top 10 John Bush-era songs, and the free streaming mp3s contained therein (!!!) provided the soundtrack for my afternoon smoke-a-thon yesterday. The list is top notch and reminds us just why we love John Bush so much. The one oversight is the omission of “Inside Out” from Volume 8: The Threat Is Real, which might be the single heaviest Anthrax song ever and should be a staple in any “best of” conversation regarding Bush.

Head on over to Noisecreep to read and listen. Make sure you click those streaming links multiple times so John Bush gets a few extra pennies in his pockets just in case that Burger King voiceover gig ever kicks the bucket.

-VN

Right after John Bush played what might or might not be a one-off reunion show with Anthrax, I wrote, “I’d love to post some footage of Bush performing a Bush-era song, but can’t seem to find any.” Well, the metal gods heard my prayers, and SMN News posted the below footage of the band doing “Safe Home.” And the quality of the footage is actually perfect – it’s not just some shit a fan captured on his or her cell phone! Band sounds good, too.

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