First, a little backstory. Back in 2006, Darkest Hour was making the promotional rounds for their latest disc, Undoing Ruin. I was working for my shitty college paper, doing a show preview for DH’s show in Omaha, Nebraska and emailed Kris requesting an interview. He called me five minutes after I sent the email. That’s how cool of a guy he is.

Besides being one hell of a nice dude, Kris is an extremely talented musician, and his new project, A Cancerous Affair, has completed their lineup and is starting to produce what will most definitely be some killer tunes.  Check out my interview with Kris below.

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We can’t believe that this is really happening. To paraphrase John McClane in Die Hard 2, “How can the same shit happen to the same band twice?”

More than two years ago, Winds of Plague’s then-keyboardist, Kristen Randall, took a picture of herself topless — and the picture subsequently found its way onto the internet (you can see it here). Since then, Randall has been replaced not once but twice with different young ladies, presumably because WOP need an attractive woman in the band at all times, lest their fans notice the band’s lack of talent.  The gimmick has gotten so silly that following the announcement of Randall’s latest successor, Alana Potocnik (formerly of The Breathing Process and Abigail Williams) was announced, Vince joked that maybe someday she’d have leaked nudie pics, too.

Well, guess what? Now she does. They were apparently first posted at Is Anyone Up, but were sent to us by an anonymous reader. And because we’re mental midgets who still find both female and male nudity hilarious  (don’t forget that we’ve posted pics of Rose Funeral’s Dusty Boles thrusty pole and Lars’ little Ulrich, too) we find them amusing. Needless to say, they’re NSFW.

There are three pics, but only one of them displays Ms. Potocnik’s face, so the other two could be fakes, but, uh, maybe not. In any case, we’re starting to wonder if Potocnik and Winds of Plague are doing this on-purpose; it’s just too big a coincidence that the female members of Winds of Plague keep enduring the same scandal. ‘Cause if they’re not doing it for the publicity, then, uh, well, that’s just sad.

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Winds of Plague have released the below Christmas video, which includes a too-brief sample of a new song, “Refining the Fire.” The band is scheduled to release a new album on Century next year.

It will be interesting to see how the Decibel Hall of Famers and New York Times profilees fare with new keyboardist Alana Potocnik stepping in for the departed Kristen Randall, who was, as we all know, a cornerstone of WOP’s sound and songwriting process. A little birdie tells me that this album will be a return to the band’s tr00 thugcore roots a la Decimate the Weak, and the music below would certainly seem to confirm that. But however it sounds, here’s hoping that these critics’ darlings can finally find the mass audience their reviews suggest they so richly deserve.

-AR

“But seriously, why don’t people respect me for my musical ability???”

Kristen Randall’s biggest contribution to music is a leaked photo of her boobs, and when she left Winds of Plague last year, the world responded with a resounding “whatever” as the band proved that one cute chick keyboardist is as enticing to male suburban virgins as another.

So, following the same line of completely 110% sound logic that dictates that men should not be interested in breasts, Randall is taking the next logical step in her career and launching a solo project.

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There’s a NSFW image after the jump. You’ve been warned.

Angela Gossow in the 2006 edition of Revolver’s “Hottest Chicks in Metal”

I love masturbating as much as the next guy who spends most of his day at the computer, but there’s no getting around the fact that Revolver’s annual “Hottest Chicks in Metal” issue – and now, apparently, accompanying calendar – is completely ridiculous. It has nothing to do with music, and there’s no equivalent issue for “Hottest Dudes in Metal,” because, well, metal is mostly a sausage fest and I imagine that a “Hottest Dudes” issue wouldn’t sell very well.

Now Arch Enemy’s Angela Gossow – who has been featured in past “Hottest Chicks” issues – has spoken out against the concept… as if you needed another reason to love her. From a recent interview with KNAC:

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…but apparently she’s going to be the new keyboardist in Winds of Plague, at least for their upcoming tour. A press release tells us that she used to be in Kittie and Day of Contempt, if that means anything to anyone.

Here’s what I’d like to know: do you think they ever even for a second considered getting a dude keyboard player? I’m not at all opposed to chicks in metal bands, but it’s not like Kristen Randall did backing vocals or whatever – literally any capable keyboard player should, theoretically, be able to fill Randall’s shoes. If a woman happens to be the best musician for the job, swell. But if you’re just swapping out one pretty face for another…

Get WOP tour dates here.

-AR

Yeah. That was pretty cool. (NSFW!)

In other news, a press release tells us that Randall has left Winds of Plague and is going to be on an episode of L.A. Ink. Whoop-de-do.

-VN

Winds of Plague = really good people. Not only did they know their shit, they also had a sense of humor that wasn’t consistent with that of an inbred southern hick. Vocalist Johnny Plague can bench-press 5,000 lbs a day and keyboardist Kristen Randall may or may not be into making out with chicks – maybe I read too far into some things she said, or maybe I just automatically assume everyone is gay until proven straight, or maybe I just was hoping to make-out with Kristin because, let me tell you, she is pretty smokin’ in person. As a matter of fact, there isn’t one unattractive person in the band. That has nothing to do with their music, and everything to do with being horny. All the time.

ANYWAYS, Johnny’s idea (which may or may not have been plagiarized) for The Great Stone War is pretty nifty. Yeah, it’s yet ANOTHER concept album. But from what I have heard thus far, it’s a solid fucking record. If you weren’t a fan of Decimate The Weak, do yourself a favor and check out The Great Stone War.  If for some reason you’re not into it, at least you have a bunch of sweet artwork from the album sleeve to peep at from time to time.

For the most part, these guys (and gal) are going to be pretty busy the rest of 2009. Rumor has it they will be touring with Unearth in November, so make sure to keep an eye out for an official press release. Below is my slightly awkward interview.

P.S. – Enough with the WOP basketball jerseys. Please. That shit needs to stop. Seriously, this is just silly already.

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More new music for your Monday. Hoo-ray!

• Vader have a new song, “We are the Horde,” streaming here. The track comes off the band’s forthcoming, uniquely titled Necropolis, which comes out September 22. At this point, Vader is barely the band that made Kingdom, but, hey, it still sounds nice n’ brutal.
• Winds of Plague are streaming a new song, “Soldiers of Doomsday,” here. It comes off their new album, The Great Stone War, which comes out August 11 on Century. And here’s the thing about the record: yes, Johnny Plague dresses like a mo’ron, and yes, Kristen Randall really could have handled that whole boobie incident better. But the band can clearly play, and seem to be moving in a more Sumeriancore direction. I’m not sure that this album is the greatest thing ever, but it is wwwwaaaayyyyy better than I assumed it would be. So at least give the song a listen before you start bitching. ‘Cause I’m legitimately curious to hear what peeps think of it.

-AR

Got this email from MetalSucks Maniac Andrew Doty over the weekend:

I was reading through the MS archives earlier today, as I completely lack a real
life, and was browsing through the “Fuck you, too,” blog series. So, I came upon the
response to Kristen Randall naked picture thing, wherein something about a naked
picture of Lars Ulrich was mentioned, as though it did not exist. So, I thought I
would alert you that it totally does.

I found it when I was looking for Lars being a dick, to illustrate the point that
Lars Ulrich is a dick. Google wasn’t about to take that shit lying down, however,
and let me search for the word “dick” without giving me porn as a result.

Well, fair is fair, and I did say if there was a photo of Lars Ulrich naked, we’d post it, so… after the jump, Lars’ penis. Needless to say, this is NSFW.

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I suppose it’s entirely possible that Winds of Plague – or, more specifically, Winds of Plague’s handlers – cleared the rights to use clips from Zack Snyder’s film adaptation of Frank Miller’s comic book graphic novel 300 for their new video, “Anthems of the Apocalypse.” But I somehow doubt it; I can’t see Warner Bros. giving up the rights that cheaply, and I don’t see WOP having it in their budget to fork over the Benjamins. Maybe they paid the dubba-dubba-WB with naked photos of keyboardsit Kristen Randall?

In any case, I have no fucking idea what the thematic significance is of 300 to the song anyway. In a press release, lead singer Johnny (the release doesn’t say what the dude’s last name is and I am far too lazy to Wikipedia that bitch right now) attempts to explain:

“This video pretty much is the perfect representation of WINDS OF PLAGUE: an energetic live show meets the brutal killing fields of oversized monsters, demonic samurai warriors and buff killing machines.”

Translation: “It looked cool.”

-AR

Apropos of nothing, we just wanna say: PLEASE DON’T SEE SAW V THIS WEEKEND. It’s time for that stupid fucking franchise to die already. If you’re in the mood for a horror movie because Halloween is coming up, there’s better fucking things you can rent. For fuck’s sake, just watch John Carpenter’s original Halloween again. Just don’t send the message that we want more of these inane fucking movies.

ANYWAY, here’s some shit that happened in the world of metal this week.

• Guns N’ Roses finally sent a single to radio and confirmed the release of Chinese Democracy. Enough of you cared enough to tell us you don’t care.
• We interviewed Opeth and 3. Progginess ensued.
• God Forbid’s new album got a title!
• Winds of Plague’s Kristen Randall thinks she’s Gloria Steinem. Thinking logical human beings everywhere strongly disagree.

Join us next week, same bat time, same bat channel!

Back in September, a topless photo of Winds of Plague keyboardist Kristen Randall took of herself found its way onto the internet. The best thing Randall could have done at that point probably would have been to just remain silent, ride out the brouhaha, and just let everyone forget it ever happened. Instead, Randall has opted to let a month pass, ride out the brouhaha, let everyone forget it ever happened, and then remind everyone via a stentorian guest entry on Headbanger’s Blog.

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Let’s keep this short and sweet. Revolver reports:

Winds of Plague keyboardist and Revolver ‘Hottest Chicks in Metal’ alumna Kristen Randall has bared more than her soul in a sexy candid shot… The picture, which appears to have been taken by Randall herself while standing before a mirror, has already won the band a bunch of new fans, at least judging by comments posted on the site.

The pic is, for reasons not really clear to me at this time, on the Lamb of God message board; but for the sake of convenience, we’ve posted it after the jump.

And, as if I needed to say, this is NSF-fuckin’-W. ‘Cause, you know, she’s topless.

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