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I’m not sure what the what is the difference between Peta and Peta 2, other than Peta makes awesome ads like this one…
…and Peta 2 makes less awesome ads like this one:
Leaves’ Eyes vocalist Liv Kristine has written another ridiculous top five list for The Deciblog – this one about the best “vegetarian eats” – but it’s not really offensive, and it would just be petty of me to respond with a top five “meat eats” or whatever (although there’s some obvious humor to be had there).
No, instead I’d like to concentrate on this morning’s Invisible Oranges post by Cosmo Lee regarding “the new breed of female metallers,” which seems to have been inspired, at least in part, by Kristine’s initial list about why women in metal rule, and my (admittedly sophomoric) response.
As is usually the case, Mr. Lee makes some excellent recommendations, my favorite of which is a Russian band, Tantal. Here’s their video for a song called “Suicide.” I suggest you stick with it through the entire six minutes, even if you don’t dig the beginning – as Cosmo writes, “It starts off cheesy but gets better and better, with an amazing Between the Buried and Me-style outro.”
So Blabbermouth posted this live footage of Lacuna Coil performing at the Graspop Metal Meeting in Belgium a few weeks back. I clicked, figuring I’d at least get to oggle at Cristina Scabbia; the one-camera shoot meant this ended up not being the case, but I at least got to hear her very sexy voice… and male vocalist Andrea Ferro’s vocal diarrhea.
True, soundboard recordings are always a mixed bag; you hear each instrument clearly, but you don’t necessarily hear them the way they sounded live because house engineers mix to the sound of the venue, not through headphones. But Ferro’s performance is just undeniably, horrifyingly god awful. “Spellbound” starts off innocently enough with the instrumental intro, after which Ferro takes a stab at his first verse. I don’t think it’s possible for him to sound any worse; I mean, it’s like… just BAD. How is this guy still in the band? And to make matters worse, Cristina Scabbia follows him with a chorus that sounds practically perfect, arresting as always, as if to say “This guy sucks so bad, doesn’t he?”
-VN
It’s Monday, it’s purty outside, and there’s a new Lacuna Coil video. I like it!
No no, the video is actually for the track “I Like It” from Lacuna Coil’s pretty good April release Shallow Life (read our own Anso DF’s review). The plotline of the video is pretty much retarded but I guess provides a good way for the director to involve everyone in the band who isn’t Cristina Scabbia. But let’s face it, we’re all really watching to see Scabbia anyway, aren’t we? Thankfully she gets plenty of face-time in this clip too.
Read Anso’s fun recent interview with Scabbia here.
-VN
This week in Soundscan, supergroup Chickenfoot shifted a ridiculous number of records. I’m baffled too. Elsewhere, Iron Maiden had a solid debut and bands like Nickelback, Hollywood Undead, Shinedown, Slipknot, and Metallica continued on with business as usual.
Some of you seem to find it shocking that we actually read your comments (and often reply to e-mails, for that matter). To which I say: why the fuck else would we even have a comments section? We love to read the comments. To wit:
And next week we’re gonna try to really piss you cats off.
-AR
Lacuna Coil makes it easy for haters. For one thing, their latest (and best) album ostensibly explores the meaninglessness of modern life, yet Shallow Life itself is immediate, thoughtless pop. Luckily, it’s awesome pop, to be enjoyed in the same disposable way as Doritos and Indiana Jones: as good, pointless fun. And though it suffers for its lack of depth, most of the Shallow Life experience is awesome hookery bolstered by Don Gilmore’s micro-tuned (post-)production. Arrangements are mercilessly utilitarian, with very few intros or outros or reps. At first, the record’s swift economy of riffage kinda feels like abridgement, like Reader’s Digest’s Shallow Life. But it’s soon clear that the brevity is basically a mercy killing, cuz, if you recall, guitarists Cristiano Migliore and Marco Biazzi played like vaginas on 2006’s otherwise awesome Karmacode. Those two either needed to get a style, or be banished to the background with (snicker) the keyboard player – and they are on Shallow Life. Out of convenience if not necessity, Gilmore’s Lacuna Coil is no longer a guitar band, but a pop band with heavy guitars, like Paramore, Garbage, and In Flames.
When @AlishaThrashion tweeted from the Music As a Weapon tour stop in New Jersey on Wednesday that there was a Hasid in the moshpit, I responded with what any skeptical Jew like myself would: “pics or it didn’t happen.” And within a few minutes, I had the above in my inbox.
Pretty awesome (moshpit dude, if you’re reading this — you rule). Metal knows no religious boundaries! So I got to thinkin’… what are some funny Music As A Weapon-related puns we can connect to Jewish themes? (For those who don’t know, your editors are Jewish, so we can make these jokes guilt-free). Bands on the tour are Disturbed, Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira. Examples:
Gifiltefish Engage
The Impossibility of Kvetching
Alice or Just Shvitzing
Down With the 10 Plagues
Winner gets some cool posters and stickers in the mail. Go!
Two excellent – albeit very different – upcoming metal releases are currently streaming in their entirety:
-AR
Seriously. Ever since Metal Hammer gave us that Web of Death thing, I’ve been knee-deep in pussy. Incredible. It’s amazing that I’m even able to type right now, I’m so worn out. And that’s why you start a website. For the groupies.
Which brings me to my next point: now that we’re famous, we don’t want to be friends with you anymore. Don’t take it personally, we just prefer to rub elbows with other fabulous, famous people. You were great on the way up, but now? Fuck you. M’kay?
Here’s what else went down this week:
Alright. I’ve got like ten girls clawing at me right now, beckoning me back to bed. I’ll see you Monday, if they’ll give me a rest, already.
-AR
First of all, props to our boy Anso DF for successfully making it through his interview with Lacuna Coil’s Christina Scabbia without embarrassing himself or in any way giving Ms. Scabbia cause to get a restraining order (of course that’s part of the reason we had him do a phoner and not an in-person – but still). I’m fairly certain if Vince or I had conducted the interview, we’d be in prison right now.
Second of all, we’ve now heard LC’s new album, Shallow Life, and, hey!, guess what? It’s pretty darn good.
So. The band has made a new song, “Not Enough,” available for free download. So, y’know, enjoy that shit.
Lacuna Coil, “Not Enough” – Shallow Life (Century)
Shallow Life comes out April 20 in Europe and April 21 in the States on Century.
-AR
When you talk about Cristina Scabbia, bewitching singer of Italy’s Lacuna Coil, it’s tempting to devote poetic volumes to descriptions of her melodic acumen, intoxicating voice, and oppressive physical beauty. Even knowing all this, I was still able to be surprised by Scabbia’s effortless coolness: the reader has to imagine her expressing polite disagreement by gently raising the pitch of her voice, dismissing haters with venomless derision, and discoursing like someone casually thinking aloud. Conversely, picture the interviewer perplexed by feelings of sexual longing for his phone, from which Scabbia’s oddly musical speaking voice emanated. (It didn’t help that Scabbia thoughtlessly spoke of wanting more and more, improving your stuff, and getting squeezed in the studio.)
After some shared confusion regarding the difference between Arizona and New Mexico, Scabbia spoke with MetalSucks about her band’s new record Shallow Life (out April 21), boisterous busmates, touring with the melodic dudes of Disturbed, and why Lacuna Coil is a happy band. Check out their new video, “Spellbound,” above; then the full interview is after the jump.
Thanks to our pal Anso at Hipsters Out of Metal! for noticing something we somehow completely missed: there’s a new Lacuna Coil single, “Spellbound.” It’s considerably more of a straight-forward hard rock track than we’ve heard from this band in the past… and I’m honestly not sure right now how I feel about that. One thing I do think (and I’m once again seconding Anso’s sentiments): not enough Christina Scabbia. Does anyone really think people listen to this band because of the other guy? Gimme a break.
Shallow Life, the new album from Christina Scabbia and some other dudes no one cares about, will be released on Century on April 21 (one day earlier in Europe).
-AR
While we had just planned on catching Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira on this Spring’s Music As A Weapon Tour and leaving before Disturbed hit the stage, it may be that we won’t have to. The latest round of announced tour dates includes an April 15th date in Lowell, Mass, a Boston exurb on the New Hampshire border that’s only 40 miles (and 2 days) away from the New England Metal and Hardcore Festival in Worcester, Mass. Could we be in for some more additions to the Friday night lineup?
Next week the U.S. gets a new President, thank fucking God, and Relapse Records is celebrating by issuing a 7″ box set of their This Comp Kills Fascists compilation. How fucking awesome is that? Until then, here’s what we’ll mull over during the long weekend (MLK day in the U.S.):
When it was announced last month that Killswitch Engage would be on Disturbed’s fourth Music as a Weapon tour, we were flooded with so many irate e-mails from readers you’d have thought that Howard Jones had just been caught raping hundreds of metal fans’ mothers; KSE fans just couldn’t seem to wrap their heads around the concept of the American New Wavers acting as support for one of the most love ‘em or loathe ‘em nu metal acts on the planet. We didn’t report on the development at the time, though. Frankly, I figured it was just one of those things; sometimes awesome bands tour with crappy ones. You can’t please all the people all the time.
But now that Chimaira and Lacuna Coil have joined the tour, I gotta ask: what the frick?
And, as the keen observers at Hipsters out of Metal so duly noted, Lacuna Coil’s 2006 album Karmacode was a damn good record:
Somehow Italy’s Lacuna Coil snatched awesomeness from the jaws of mediocrity by releasing 2006’s most compelling melody album, Karmacode. Prior to that, LC boasted one great single (over like 17 albums) and Cristina Scabbia (above), loud rock’s best singer — and whoa quite a fetching one at that. Some Iowan guitarists have all the luck. I haven’t called off my campaign to get Scabbia a solo record, though Karmacode did a lot to mute my demands; we’ll see if the goofy outfit-prone (read: European) sextet turns out a second near-masterpiece. For now, LC’s double DVD Visual Karma (Body, Mind, and Soul) comes out in November. Check out Karmacode’s sledgehammer tune “Closer” live (and acoustic ugh) on Dave Navarro’s uh Spread TV. Let’s get a pool going for time elapsed between the band arriving on set and Navarro’s first proposition to ’spread’ Scabbia. It was probably in the rider.
In case you’re still doubting either Scabbia’s hotness or stunning vocal ability, check out said acoustic performance on Dave Navarro’s show, after the jump. We really, really feel bad for the dude singer. I mean… He MUST know…. Right?
-VN
Guitar Hero III featured Slash and Tom Morello as bosses and pretty much used Slash as the entire basis of the video game’s ad campaign; I guess now it’s Zakk Wylde’s turn, as the Ozzy/Black Label Society axemaster is now being featured in a trailer for Guitar Hero World Tour, which will be released on October 26.
Oddly enough, while there’s a BLS song in the game, Wylde played on neither of the original recordings of the included Ozzy songs, “Crazy Train” and “Mr. Crowley.” I don’t know if they’ll be using re-recorded versions featuring Wylde for the purposes of the game or if they’re just depending on Guitar Hero’s younger (read: target) audience not know the difference between Wylde and Randy Rhodes.
In any case, here’s the trailer:
As is usually the case with Guitar Hero, there’s a whole lotta metal included in this edition’s “set list,” including three Tool songs and offerings by Metallica, Van Halen, System of a Down, Dream Theater and Lacuna Coil. Should be fun if you like these rhythm games.
-AR
FUCK SCOTT WEILAND. I’m glad you’ve been able to get this far based on your limited vocal range and ability to mimic the same style of on-stage dancing that Bowie and Iggy Pop were doing thirty years ago, but seriously, stop trying to compete with Axl Rose for the “Biggest Asshole” award – Axl will beat your ass every time. Calling Slash by his real name in a press release does not make you clever. Claiming the name “Velvet Revolver” was your idea does not make you cool. You’ve always had to suck off the musical talent teat of others, and every time I think about the fact that Layne Staley couldn’t get it together while you go on and on and on I die a little inside. I hope the DeLeo brothers stab you in the eyes with your fucking needles. And fuck your wife Mary, too.
FUCK ROBB FLYNN. I’m a huge Machine Head fan, but telling people that you “once punched some kid in the face for saying that Gary Holt sucked” is moronic. Metal is supposed to be about blowing off steam in a healthy way so as to avoid actual neanderthal behavior. There are plenty of legitimate reasons to fight in this world, but someone insulting the fucking guitar player from Exodus is not one of them. Put more simply: You either a) actually did punch some dude for talking shit about Holt and are therefore a bona fide moron or b) are lying about punching some dude for talking shit about Holt and are therefore a bona fide moron. Also, every Machine Head album in-between Burn My Eyes and Through the Ashes of Empires was a cock sucking trend chasing waste of time. Deal with it.
FUCK MARIA BRINK. Someone told me that if you see her up close she’s not actually hot, but after looking closely at some candid photos (like this one), I realized you don’t really have to be very close to her all to see that she looks like a fucking rodent. Has this bitch had too much plastic surgery (excuse me, “work done”), or does she really just look like my morning crap? Also, did you know that she sells hand drawn pictures and poems on her MySpace page (I won’t link to it, go find it if you’re so fucking interested)? I haven’t read the poems but the pictures look like they were drawn by a retarded five year old. Stop wearing that stupid blue dress and trying to exploit your non-existent looks to cover up for your lack of talent. I hope Christina Scabbia kicks you in the twat.
Fuck me for writing this, and fuck you for reading it. I’m gonna go kill a fucking bunny that made fun of Alex Skolnick.
-AR
Boy, Cristina Scabbia is lucky she’s so hot. ‘Cause her stage presence is super-cheesy. And I say that as someone who actually likes Lacuna Coil.
ANYWAY, the best part of the below footage of Scabbia joining Megadeth on stage last night for a rendition of “A Tout Le Monde” is the fact that her vocals are practically non-existant in the mix. At first I thought maybe it was just the shitty audio quality of this fan-made video, but no; you can hear almost everything else perfectly, just not Scabbia.
I guess Dave likes to stand near hot women, so long as they don’t make a peep. He’s not exactly alone in that regard.
[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/wdCG_cYYvCg" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]
-AR
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