When I was in the tenth grade, back in 1997, someone in my school’s administration decided to lump me in with the 30 or so fuck-ups, or, sorry, “at-risk” group of kids. My grades weren’t terrible, and I didn’t really get into trouble or use drugs that much. However, I did wear shirts from bands like Cannibal Corpse and Anal Cunt just about every day, so I suppose they were justified in thinking that I had emotional problems. I never complained though, because once a week I got to skip class and go to some special room with my fellow flunkies and have what I can only assume is the equivalent to an AA meeting. It was interesting to hear these kids talk about smoking crack, the pleasures of meth, and beating people up over bad weed deals. I don’t think I ever had what it takes to lose myself to substance abuse, but if I did, I’m sure this helped me stay on a positive course. Sometimes we’d have guest speakers come in to these meetings. There are two that I remember most vividly. One being Robert Downey Jr., who was presumably there as part of some community service he had to do. The other was some woman who had a lengthy discussion with us on how marijuana will never be legalized in our lifetime.

That woman is either dead or choking on her own foot now, because in November, California will be voting on proposition 19. If passed, it will legalize marijuana for recreational use in our state.

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Holy stony synchronicity!!!!!!!!

Have you guys heard about this crazy volcanic ash situation in Europe that´s grounding planes left and right?!?!?

Well guess whose flight got cancelled from AmstermotherfuckingDAM to NYC yesterday and is stuck spending the week smoking the world´s best hash and weed???

This is not going to be easy — I really appreciate your sympathy.

-KW

Hey hey hey kids. In honor of the fact that it’s a) 4/20 and b) just one day before the release of Dååth’s awesome new album, The Concealers (read my review here), we’re teaming with the band to give away some special shit that I am now legally obligated to tell you is for tobacco use only. Seriously. One of you will win a bubbler and one of you will win a bowl, both bought and paid for by Dååth guitarist Eyal Levi out of his own pocket and the goodness of his heart, and you are not to use these items for anything other than the smoking of tobacco. Also, remember that God hates it when you masturbate.

ANYWAY, here’s what you have to do to win:

IN THE COMMENTS SECTION BELOW, TELL US YOUR FAVORITE SONG TO GET STONED TO.

And that’s it. Eyal will personally select one winner, who wins the very cool bubbler, and MetalSucks’ own resident Song to Get Stoned To expert, Mr. Kip Wingerschmidt himself, will select the second winner, who gets the bowl.

Please make sure you register for our comments section with a real e-mail address, as all winners will contacted by e-mail.

This contest runs from midnight to midnight EST on 4/20, and is open to U.S. residents only.

AND DON’T FORGET THAT DÅÅTH’S THE CONCEALERS IS IN STORES TOMORROW.

Good luck everyone, and, y’know… smoke ‘em if you got ‘em.

-MetalSucks (but WeedRules)