MetalSucks

Back in 1996, I was an angst-ridden young buck, and the only kind of music I truly cared about was industrial rock. Indeed, it was at the tail of a gilded age for the subgenre, the door to commercial success having been opened a few years earlier by major-label breakthrough artists like Nine Inch Nails and Ministry as well as notable independent label acts like long-slogging innovators KMFDM. If you have ever owned music from bands like God Lives Underwater or Gravity Kills, you know exactly what I’m talking about, brother.

That same year also saw the major release of a self-titled debut from SKOLD, a dark electronic project from a former member of glammy metal act Shotgun Messiah, a group that had toyed with industrial rock on their final album Violent New Breed. Though there wasn’t a bad song in the bunch, the highlights included machinist’s slog “Dust To Dust” and soaring dystopian anthem “Neverland.” Though mastermind Mr. Tim Skold would move on to lengthy stints with Marilyn Manson (refer to: The Golden Age Of Grotesque, arguably the band’s finest record) and the aforementioned KMFDM, this now woefully out-of-print album–and occasionally accompanying promo VHS cassette–has always held a special plate in my withered heart. This is is why I am so pleased to report that after thirteen (13!) long years, Mr. Skold has revived this long dormant solo act.

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Was Rob Zombie never cool and I was just an idiot? Or am I right that he’s only recently become kind of a let down? I honestly can’t tell.

Anyways, even if we ignore the cheesiness of the fact that Zombie is obviously trying to cash-in on past glories by making a sequel album (Has there ever been a good “Part 2″ record? First person to say Operation: Mindcrime II gets a kick in the anus.), this cover art clearly comes from the Marilyn Manson school of “Have an intern whip something up on Photoshop.” Which is not only lame, but kinda weird: Zombie went to the prestigious art school Cooper Union.

You can do better than this, Rob. C’mon. Be cool again.

-AR

So, Marilyn Mansion has Swine Flu. This is very amusing. Says Manson, “I know everyone will suggest that fucking a pig is how this disease was obtained. However, the doctor said, my past choices in women have in no way contributed to me acquiring this mysterious sickness.”

Let’s have some fun with this, shall we? Let’s play a game where the object is to come up with Manson-related Swine Flu puns, and the prize is the satisfaction of knowing you’re hilarious. I’m gonna go first:

• The Beautiful Pig-Squeal
• Piggy Ramirez
• Eat Me, Eat Me
• The Pork Show

Now your turn… go!

-VN

In case you didn’t know, Alice Cooper is a lame old man. How lame and old? He plays golf…

…and wrote a book about playing golf…

…and is friends with Pat Boone. Yes, that Pat Boone.

So how is it possible that a church group could still find this 61 year-old boring fart threatening?

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UPDATE: According to Lambgoat, this story is bunk. Oh well.

Is this summer’s Rockstar Mayhem Festival trek the nail in Marilyn Manson’s coffin? Manson appears to be fucked up beyond belief in the press he’s done this year, and by all accounts his headlining stage show is a complete wreck night after night (we didn’t even watch). And now this: Manson has threatened to “rape” Black Dahlia Murder frontman Trevor Strnad’s face at a recent fan meet-and-greet in Florida.

Reports the New Zealand Herald:

The incident erupted as Marilyn was signing autographs for fans at a meet-and-greet in Florida, US, when Strnad shouted: “Welcome to the freak show,” prompting Marilyn to write “I hate those ****s” on the tablecloth in front of a fan.

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Last week was somewhat of a slow one for metal record sales. There weren’t a whole lot of new releases, but a few records that have been out for a while hung onto their spots in the Top 200 and Hank III’s Assjack project had a solid debut. Click through for chart positions and sales numbers.

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A tweet from The Syndicate alerted me to this story about the recent re-launch of Buddyhead.com, “the original snarky music website.” Seems that Buddyhead founder Travis Keller made some off-the-cuff comments about Manson’s fashion sense (or lack thereof). Manson, in turn, decided to take the high road but issuing an open challenge to bloggers everywhere:

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This week in Soundscan, supergroup Chickenfoot shifted a ridiculous number of records. I’m baffled too. Elsewhere, Iron Maiden had a solid debut and bands like Nickelback, Hollywood Undead, Shinedown, Slipknot, and Metallica continued on with business as usual.

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And the hits just keep coming: Marilyn Manson has now leant his vocals to a remix of a Lady GaGa song called “Love Game,” which is currently being hosted by Perez Hilton, a.k.a. the MetalSucks of douchey celebrities. And while there’s something kinda funny about Manson being involved in a pop song where a woman is saying “I wanna take a ride on your disco stick,” the song is otherwise, as you’d expect, completely fucking awful.

I don’t know much about Lady GaGa, but someone more in the know about these things than I recently told me that she’s going to be bigger than Madonna. If that’s true, I hope I die tomorrow.

-AR

Thanks to Josh Kidd for the tip. Actually, take it back. Fuck you, Josh.

Speaking to Spinner.com earlier this week, Trent Reznor said of his former protegé, Marilyn Manson, “drugs and alcohol now rule his life.”

And now this BBC interview pretty much seems to prove it.

This is funny/sad, and worth a listen even if (or maybe especially if?) you don’t like Manson.

-AR

[via Blabbermouth]

NME.com just debuted the new Marilyn Manson video, “Arma-Goddamn-Motherfuckin’-Geddon,” or, as it seems to be called for the purposes of this lame ass video, “Arma-arma-arma-arma-armageddon.”

So, yeah, the song has grown on me slightly since I first heard it, but it’s still not great, and the video sucks – it’s like a parody of a cliché of Manson videos. Also, funny that Twiggy is the only other band member in the video. Also, funny that he’s playing guitar.

Manson’s new album, The High End of the Low, comes out May 26. Everything we’ve heard/seen from it so far suggests that it’s going to blow goats.

-AR

To review: last year Wes Borland joined Marilyn Manson. This seemed a little odd because while Manson and Borland both like to play dress-up, Manson is a known Limp Bizkit hater – a fact which Manson explained away at the time by claiming that Borland “used to be in a really terrible band that he left because he felt that it was a destructive force in art.”

Of course, this little marriage didn’t last very long because Borland went running back to Bizkit, thus making Manson look like a fool or, at best, pretty naieve.

So, of course, Manson being the God of Shit Talkers, he has now lashed out at Borland in Kerrang:

“We almost made the mistake of having Wes play guitar but he re-joined Limp Bizkit,” Manson explains. “That move forever eradicated my feelings on his choices in life as an artist.”

When asked why he thinks Borland went back to his old band, Manson said: “That is what I find myself asking when I urinate sometimes. He said he would never go back. If the reason is money, then I’d rather roll up a 5 note and shove it up my urethra. I’d rather set my dick on fire than join something that I hated.”

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Holy shit, did it take them five whole mintues to throw this together?

-AR

…don’t.

We still haven’t heard the full album, The High End of Low, but the band has sent out a six song sampler, featuring three songs we’ve already heard and three brand spankin’ new ones. And while the songs aren’t terrible, exactly, they certainly don’t sound anything like the band that made Antichrist Superstar or, um, anything else from the original Twiggy Ramirez-era.

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I understand that most readers of this site hate Marilyn Manson, and from a certain perspective, I understand why. But Manson is one of the last consistently decent purveyors of pop metal, and, well, some days I loves me some pop metal.

That being said… these two new Manson leaks from his forthcoming The High End of the Low are just terrible. I think that most fans were hoping that the return of Jeordie White Twiggy Ramirez to the fold would mean the return of the rock to Manson’s music – something a little more in the vein of “Irresponsible Hate Anthem” – and this just isn’t that. Which might be fine – personally, I like the Twiggyless Manson albums – but these songs are weak.

The first one, “Arma-God-Damn-Mother-Fucking-Geddon,” has one kinda funny lyric (”First you try to fuck it, then you try to eat it,”), but otherwise sounds like some third rate hipster bullshit; the second song, “The Wow,” is pretty much just a stright-up rip-off of NIN’s “Only.” Seriously. It’s stupid.

Here are the songs. A third, “We’re From America,” will apparently be avail for free download from Manson’s website later today. Although, after hearing these first two songs, I’m not very excited.

“Arma-God-Damn-Mother-Fucking-Geddon”

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I saw Cold open for Marilyn Manson once. Even though it was a good month after Halloween (I recall only because it was Thanksgiving weekend), guitarist Terry Balsucko wore a Michael Meyers mask the whole set and stood almost perfectly still, hunched over his guitar as though he should be in the belfry at Notre Dame; vocalist Scooter Ward stood at the lip of the stage, smoking a cigarette and remaining otherwise completely stationary; and drummer Sam McCandless’ hair was dyed to look like a cheetah’s fur.

Needless to say, it was the most painful forty minutes of my life.

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Fuck Wes Borland, and fuck everyone who supported this lying sack of shit.

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Last week, we told you about Zakk Wylde’s contribution to “Addiction,” an awful new song by the awful band Dope. The song now has a music video, which was directed by Kevin Custer and MetalSucks Maniac hater Dale “Happy-Go-Lucky Sunshine Fun Time” Resteghini.

Here are things about the video that I find really, really fucking weak:

1. Edsel Dope is in it.
2. Virus is in it.
3. The song.
4. That uninformed viewers may come under the impression that Virus is playing Zakk Wylde’s part.
5. How the members of Dope now dress like the members of Black Label Society instead of the members of Marilyn Manson or, more shockingly, themselves.
6. That Edsel Dope is actually wearing a Black Label Society jacket.

Here are things about the video that I like:

1. Big Fake Titties.
2. Big Fake Titties actually gets a costume change.
3. That watching it will steal less than three minutes of your life away.

The video itself can be viewed after the jump. It’s not really safe for work, and definitely not safe for human ears, so… consider yourself warned.

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It was fun to speculate last about with whom Slayer might spend the summer touring, but now we have an official answer: as rumored, they’ll be co-headlining the Rockstar Energey Mayhem Festival with their ‘07 tourmates, Marilyn Manson.

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So apprently Slayer are gonna announce their co-headlining tour mates this coming Monday, January 26. Of course, this raises the question: who will said co-headliners be?

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