I’m really, really disappointed in you, male MetalSucksians. After reader Ashley sent in some epic photos of herself in a MetalSucks hoodie and not very much else, I predicted we’d get an identical pic from a wise-ass dude by the end of the week. Nope. Either no one thought of it, or no one had the balls to do it. For shame. And now what are the three ladies who actually read this site to look at? Pics of Lars Ulrich’s dick?

Oh well. Here are some other things that happened this week:

• We debuted new music by Daughters, Woe of Tyrants, Stigma and Nails.
• As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa wondered “Who is coming to the island on L O S T?”, while Eyal pondered whether it’s better to burn out or fade away.
• We listened to the God of War EP and new releases by Shining, Burzum, and H.I.M.
• Antonin Skullia taught us about the law of Metalocalypse.
• Did this shitty Matthew Fox show steal The Haunted’s logo?

And next week I expect you, our beloved readers, to be back up to your usual level of witty repartee.

-AR

Last week on L O S T we were introduced to “The Lighthouse,” which further complicates the nature of Jacob vs. Nemesis and their candidates. Earlier that same day I shared an idea that the Cliffside Caves actually belong to Nemesis Dude, with those whose names written inside being the pawns played in Nemesis’ Jacob-defeating end. Given that our writers have been creating a black vs. white duality since season one, it makes perfect sense that their response to a cave would be with a lighthouse. The Lighthouse, aside from an obvious physical contrasting to the cave, also possesses a different purpose: bringing people to the Island (which as we know is what Jacob has been doing since time immemorial). It is here we see an almost identical rendition of numbered candidatesto the ons in the caves, which implies that both sides are aware of all names in consideration.

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I haven’t been able to shake this cold, and so I’ve actually been playing a lot of on-line Scrabble with a friend this week (because I’m just that cool). It would be really hard to play Scrabble at a metal show, though, not least of all because so many metal d00dz can’t spell.

When we weren’t beating this whole Uno debacle to death like it had just heckled us, here’s what was happening in the world of metal:

• We streamed Mutiny Within’s self-titled debut album, and premiered a track by Dallas Coyle’s new project, Genetic.
• God Forbid’s Doc Coyle defended mainstream metal, As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa discussed the cliffside cave list on L O S T, and, yeah, Intronaut’s Sacha Dunable and Daath’s Eyal Levi each weighed-in on a certain incident involving a certain card game.
• Each of the MetalSucks writers endorsed a finalist for the Scion No Label Needed Contest.
• We checked out new albums by The Breathing Process, Hayaino Daisuki, and Bane and Rhinoceros.
• We debated the morality of a label head posting a link to an album leak.
• We are woman, hear us roar.
• We looked at Mike Patton’s penis, and are now increasingly happy our shrink is coming back from vacation next week.
• Our homeboy Corey Mitchell is co-authoring Phil Anselmo’s autobiography!

Okay. Back to Scrabble! See ya Monday. Stay warm.

-AR

Good day all,

This evening, a new episode of L O S T awaits with intentions of confusing, bamboozling, and casting us further down the six-season-vortex-of-mystery we have known for too long. Mid-season theorizing tends to be laborious in that the writers’ method for answering one question is to pose several more, which as a result leads to an overwhelming amount of hazy supposition on all forms of LOST sites. If any of you check out DarkUFO, The Fuselage , 4815162342, or even LOSTPEDIA, I’m certain you’ve noticed how gnarly it is to navigate through and read any concise analysis of what’s going on. The good news, though, is that the seemingly eternal-end-in-sight is right around the corner, and gauging from a lot of the ideas being shared here, I think we’re heading down the right path!

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Vince brought the shits back with him from Egypt and in the past twenty-four hours I’ve been hit with a cold so bad that I’m probably gonna go to sleep right around the time I hit “publish” for this post. So before I pass out, here’s a run-down of what we did while Vince was playing Camel jockey:

• We spoke to Mutiny Within’s AJ Jacobs and producer/mixer Kevin Antreassian.
• As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa discussed fate versus free will on L O S T.
• We premiered “The Last Horse” by Tiger Flowers.
• We checked out new releases by Xasthur and Borknagar and read a book by Andy McCoy, too!
• Dream Theater’s Mike Portnoy is recording with Avenged Sevenfold; black is white, up is down, cats love dogs.
• The new Bullet For My Valentine song makes a lot of people angry, either ’cause you had to tweet about it just to hear it or simply because it exists.
• One thing MS Suckalos seem to agree upon: Jake E. Lee was not Ozzy’s best guitar player.

Okay, NyQuil time. See ya Monday!!!

-AR

Greetings metal maniacs and L O S T enthusiasts,

I hope everyone had a rad past week and, for those of you who are into it, were able to watch “What Kate Does.” It wasn’t nearly as action packed or blatantly informative as “LA X”, but still there are some interesting occurrences worth discussing.

Fate vs. Freewill has been one of the central themes of this show since the get go. The introduction of the flash-sideways timeline is, at surface level, supposed to show us what life would have been like if the plane never crashed. The notion of fate, though, is becoming increasingly more “the point” as we are seeing the main characters fulfilling the destinies intended for them by (or at least on) the Island. From Ethan’s involvement with Claire’s pregnancy, to Kate being present when she initially goes into labor, to Locke’s potential “healing” via his encounter (and possible operation) with paralysis-reversing-surgeon Jack, we are seeing similar parallels to the timeline on the island. We haven’t actually been given any EXACT consistencies, however, just a bunch of “very-similars” to keep us guessing. On a side note, the woman who was assumed to adopt Claire’s baby was named Lindsey Baskum, which super nerds have decoded as an anagram meaning “Used by Malkins.” Richard Malkin was the psychic who played an extremely crucial role in getting Claire on the original Oceanic Flight 815. His involvement in this timeline is unknown for now, but the connection is worth mentioning just in case it gets the wheels turning for any of you.

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Well I had a heckuva afternoon, what with a horde of Veil of Maya fans all e-mailing me at once to express their upset that VOM’s new song wasn’t up at the time we said it would be. But it’s up now, and we think that the track, “Namaste” – not “Dexter,” as our stupid audio player says – is terrific. You can listen here and join in on the fun.

Here are some other fun things that happened this week:

• We did a Jew on Jew interview with Orphaned Land’s Kobi Farhi and released the audio of Vince’s confusing interview with Andrew W.K.
• One of As I Lay Dying guitarist Nick Hipa’s theories about L O S T was correct!!!
• Bob Cock thinks Armour are AWESOME.
• Dave Ellefson has returned to Megadeth!
• The Ultimate Warrior rules, and The Red Chord agrees.
• Anthrax’s Worship Music finally a release date: the fifth of never.
• If you have a child, don’t do this.

Have a good weekend, everyone!

-AR

Hello connoisseurs of heavy music and television shows,

Thank you all who thoroughly read, perused, or just kind of stared at my last blog, as well as all of you who left any form of comment. I read every single one of them and answered several of the ones that pertained to the topic. Before I start discussing the previous and upcoming episode, I would like to address just a few of the trending opinions I noticed in last week’s comments section:

Why a column on L O S T?

When the idea of doing this was presented to me, I was slightly apprehensive because it seemed a little random for a metal blog. What I’ve always like about MetalSucks, however, is that they do things differently then other metal sites (or maybe just better). While the majority of posts here are related to the current happenings in the metal community, the rest of the stuff we’re periodically subjected to appeals to our idiosyncrasies as “fans-of-heavy-music-who-probably-spend-way-too-much-time-on-the-internet.” A whole blog (or even maybe a thesis!) could be written on the social anthropology of the aforementioned group (us), but to get to my point quicker, I’m going to generalize and say that my assessment of most of you is that you’re educated, have a sense of humor, have very diverse tastes in music beyond metal, are extremely opinionated, and enjoy interacting with similar “birds of a feather.” This sites’ ability to creatively keep your interest beyond cleverly commentating on press releases, shows, albums, etc. is why I think its been doing so well, and why we all keep coming back. Simply put, its seems a lot of you can dig “off topic” stuff. With that in mind, I didn’t think it would hurt to discuss L O S T with those of you who care.

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Last year As I Lay Dying guitarist Nick Hipa mentioned to Axl that, like the editors of MetalSucks, he is a huge fan of the show L O S T (cue dying giraffe noise).With the final season of one of television’s great serialized mysteries debuting tonight on ABC, Axl and Vince thought, “Hey, why not ask Nick to do a series of columns about the show’s final episodes?” Luckily, Nick agreed! And so, without further adieu…

Hello fans of extreme metal music. My written word appears before you for one sole purpose: to share information, ideas, insight, and theories on ABC’s mind-melting TV show, LOST. In many circles, LOST is regarded as the Master of Puppets of prime-time television; hence, it is worth discussing on a metal blog.

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