MetalSucks

We loved the last tour blog that Bison B.C.’s Dan And did for us so much, we’re only all-too-happy to present another! Below, please enjoy part 1; check back tomorrow for part 2!

Sep 11 ‘09 (Vancouver BC @ Commodore)

I always love kicking off a tour with a show in Vancouver. It’s great to have one last chance to get completely loser pissed with our friends before we hit the road for however long. This time we were fortunate enough to finally share the stage with local good ‘ol boys The Golers and old pals 3 Inches of Blood. The Golers have been around forever and everyone should fucking hear them. They’re basically Vancouver’s Venomous Concept: relentless, break-neck speed pummeling. Is grind-punk a genre?

Show was fucking fun as all hell. It was 3 Inches record release show for Here Waits Thy Doom (which may or may not feature all of us doing backups on the song “Preacher’s Daughter”) and the place was packed! The cap of the Commodore is somewhere between 950 and 1000 and apparently it was like 15 tickets away from being sold out. Jesse from local grinders Zuckuss pointed out how fucking crazy it is that three local bands brought that many metal heads out of the woodwork. The night was bitter sweet though because not only was our good friend Ian unable to be there because of surgery but that night would also be my last chance to ever set foot in local punk/metal institution the Cobalt. I can’t even describe how awesome that bar and the staff are. The thought that it’s getting shut down by the fucking slum lords that own the building so they can cash in on Olympic fever makes me wanna tear someone’s head off. I’m consoled by the fact that I know bar legend/honcho Wendy 13 will soon enough have a new venue I can crawl out of at 5am reeking of Jager bombs. COBALT FOREVER!
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Wow, can this really be twentieth anniversary of Helmet? Well, yeah, the classic core of Henry Bogdan, Page Hamilton, and John Stanier disbanded in 1998. And sure, the reconstituted line-up that Hamilton unilaterally pulled together for 2004’s better-than-expected Size Matters has degenerated entirely into an unrecognizable cast of hired guns spilling in and out of a literal revolving door. But, uhhh, barring that, technically the band did form in 1989, so even though there’s only one original member and his last album Monochrome was fucking awful, I guess Hamilton is allowed to celebrate this moment.

But not like this.

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I became a fan of The Smashing Pumpkins the minute I heard “Drown” (or was it, “Cherub Rock?”), and as such I have followed the work of Billy Corgan throughout the lifespan of that band, not to mention his endeavors both with Zwan and on his own. Though I scoffed at the irrational backlash that accompanied the 2005 reunion sans James Iha and D’arcy Wretzky, I still have to concede that 2007’s Zeitgeist was the weakest Pumpkins release ever, and perhaps the worst album of Corgan’s career to date. The commercial failure of that record and the recent departure of longtime drummer Jimmy Chamberlin raised questions regarding the band’s future, though Corgan seems to have pulled a Page Hamilton (or perhaps an Axl Rose), carrying on with hired guns and invited guests. For you see, he now intends to release 44 new Smashing Pumpkins songs online for free. In the words of my beloved Internets: DO NOT WANT.

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Tonight, Gavin Rossdale will be playing New York’s Gramercy Theatre as part of a May/June U.S. tour supporting his 2008 solo effort Wanderlust. Those of you familiar with this record or its corresponding singles know that the former Bush frontman has departed significantly from the raucous yet melodic post-grunge of his old band, opting for a softer, essentially adult contemporary sound not entirely dissimilar to Chris Cornell’s post-Audioslave offering Carry On. While this description likely wont appeal to you metal maniacs (I sure as hell didn’t buy it), here are a few reasons why you should load up on alcohol and catch one of the upcoming dates.
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Page Hamilton’s latest batch of hired guns masquerading as “Helmet” is about to embark on a month-long European jaunt that will hit up cities in Belgium, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Italy, Spain, and The Netherlands. Kicking off January 13 in Helsinki, the tour includes opening act support on most if not all dates from Totimoshi, whose 2008 record Milagrosa was produced by Mr. Hamilton and engineered by Deaf Nephew Toshi Kasai (of Altamont and Big Business). Details can be found here.

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Just because it’s simple don’t mean it ain’t good. In fact, 16’s brand of stripped-down sludge is strikingly simple and raw but so, so brutal in its agitated energy. A press release we received yesterday declares 16 “Legendary sludge misanthropes” — I can’t argue for “legendary” ’cause I’ve never heard of ‘em (there go my precious scene points) but I’ll take the press release’s word for it; I can’t argue for “misanthropes” because I’m not focusing on the lyrics (not that I ever really do); but 16 are most certainly swampy, dirty, murky, muddy and sludged the fuck out. If Page Hamilton had taken a few more bong hits he just might have formed 1 instead of Helmet.

I just listened to all five songs on their MySpace page twice through (my favorite: “Born To Lose”) and I still want more; guess I’m gonna have to pick up their new (reunion!) album Bridges to Burn when it drops January 20th on Relapse Records.

-VN

[Read about 16's history on the Relapse website.]

Ever had really good foreplay followed by really mediocre sex? It sucks, doesn’t it?

During “Vipers, Snakes and Actors,” the opening track from Norma Jean’s new album The Anti-Mother, I actually became optimistic that I was hear the band return to form after the steaming pile of failure that was their last album, Redeemer. Don’t get me wrong – Norma Jean was never a great band by any stretch of the imagination – but on their Convergian O’ God, the Aftermath and especially Bless the Martyr, Kiss the Child, the Christian rockers made music that was loud, raw, and chaotic; it kept you on your toes because you never knew quite where it was going. “Vipers” promises more of the same, a complete one-eighty from the polished, bland, by-the-numbers pseudo-punk of Redeemer.

And then the second song on the album kicks in.

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