I’m going to put approximately as much work into this introduction as Osama bin Laden did to constantly changing locations so the American military couldn’t find him. Here’s a bunch of clips that aren’t as good as the new Red Fang video.

To being today we have Steven Tyler’s first-ever solo video, for the song “(It) Feels So Good.” And by the way, if anyone can explain (to) me why the word “it” is (in) parenthesis, (I) would grateful. Because (it) seems pretty fucking random, doesn’t (it)? And also, the song really isn’t that great, although it’s not terrible or anything. The video, on the other hand, is about as exciting as being stuck in traffic in a venue parking lot after a concert lets out. That Red Fang took what looks to me like a very small budget and made something so awesome and Steven Tyler hired some big name L.A. fashionista and Christ knows how much money and only came up with this is fucking embarrassing for Steven Tyler and the big name L.A. fashionista. Really all this video has going for it is a scantily clad hot girl, and not to be a dick or anything, but I live in downtown Manhattan and its spring time, so I can see a hot girl anytime I want just by stepping scantily clad hot girl by stepping right outside my door. And I don’t even need to listen to a mediocre song to do it!

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This is how you make a music video for the year 2010! Clear close-ups of all the dudes playing their instruments in a studio — I love it. No warehouse, no stupid CGI, no plot, no choreography — just shred! This does everything it needs to do — namely promote the band to its potential audience — and probably cost literally nothing to make, assuming one of the dudes already had a video camera and some kind of editing suite.

The band is RXYZYXR, a Swedish band about whom we’ve written before; they’re still looking for a vocalist too and are willing to talk with any would-be singer/screamers no matter where in the world they reside. So for all you aspiring metal vocalists out there, this is your big chance… unless you’re the vocal equivalent of this guy.

-VN

Are inter-continental bands the new thing?

Last month I wrote about RXYZYXR, a Swedish band using the power of the Internet to search for a vocalist regardless of location. Just the other day reader Owen W. emailed us to tell us about Slice the Cake, a really talented progressive death metal band whose members span three two continents and three countries. To my knowledge the band hasn’t ever played together in the same room, and even if they wanted to they couldn’t; Jonas Johansson (Sweden) handles guitars, bass and drums on the admittedly awesome-sounding recordings that he produced, so the band hasn’t even got a full lineup in place. But this “band” is undoubtedly quite good, at least on record. Slice the Cake are absolutely worth paying attention to; please check them out.

With stories like this and myriad one-man bedroom projects releasing quality material these days, it begs the question… when is a band actually a band? If a group of guys (or girls) calling themselves a band have never actually played together in the same room are they accurate in calling themselves a band? Should a band who’s never played a note in front of an audience be taken seriously?

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At what point do we get tired of “math-y, downtuned, Meshuggah-worshipping tech metal that gives boners to dudes like this“? Soon. Very soon. But at least for the time being it seems like the saturation point for said bands hasn’t quite been reached and there’s a remarkable amount of variation between these bands that sets (most of) them apart from one another. RXYZYXR aren’t the most original band on the planet but there’s just enough uniqueness to keep their music interesting. In a micro-genre where “bass” is a four letter word, I really dig some of the stuff their bass player is doing here.

Shelby Cobras of Illogical Contraption tells us that RXYZYXR are looking for a vocalist and they’re giving away their entire demo for free to help the process. Smart! Though the band resides in Sweden they promise via a message on their MySpace page that “The most part of work is remote,” which would seem to indicate that any potential vocalist could live anywhere. A band giving away their music for free in search of a remote vocalist… this is the future, my friends.

-VN