SEND EMAIL TO
NEWS [AT]
METALSUCKS
[DOT] NET
OMG U GUISE, Fred Durst has promised that some “huge Limp Bizkit news” is going to be announced in December. (See above tweet for details.) I am, obvs, totes excited.
What do you think it could possibly be????????? Here are some thoughts I had:
As much as I love (most) hair metal and loathe (most) nu-metal, I do have to admit that there seems to be some unspoken ongoing competition between the two genres – not to see which one can sell the most records (I suspect that hair metal wins in that regard, given that those bands’ reign lasted longer, and occurred in a purely pre-internet error), but, rather, which genre can ultimately embarrass itself more. And while you’d think that any genre that routinely invited DJs in the fold would pretty much win in a cakewalk, some days I really do think that, nope, hair metal has more idiots.
For example: remember when some former members of Snot tried to re-form that group even though Lynn Strait is dead, and then, when that didn’t work out, they decided to reform under the name “Tons,” which, all you Einsteins will surely notice, is just “Snot” spelled backwards? That was pretty dumb, right? It would be hard to imagine a stupider scenario in which former members of a famous band try to re-form under a different name, but are sure to choose one that lets everyone know their point of origin.
But if you can’t imagine a stupider scenario, it’s not because you’re lacking in creativity; it’s simply because you’re not stupid enough. But Chris Holmes is stupid enough. He some other former members of W.A.S.P. have formed Where Angels Suffer, or – yep yep! – W.A.S.
They named their band “W.A.S.” Just let that sink in for a minute.
I almost feel bad for these dudes who are so desperately clinging to the glories of their past just to put food on the table, but then again, this:
-AR
It was just yesterday that I couldn’t get Jesse Leach to comment on the Killswitch Engage singer situation. And now, after weeks and weeks of speculation, KSE have just released a statement, officially announcing Howard Jones’ departure from the band “due to personal reasons.” No further details are given.
That’s a bummer, but given all the recent rumors of Jones’ permanent departure, it’s not exactly shocking news. What is shocking is that the band has chosen not to bring original front man Jesse Leach back into the fold, or even Phil LaBonte, who covered for Jones on KSE’s most recent tour. So guess who got the gig instead?
FORMER DIVINE HERESY/SNOT VOCALIST TOMMY VEXT.
Yes… we’re as surprised as you are.
Read the complete statement from Tommy and KSE after the jump…
A reader known only as “Jonas” sent us the below video of 55 Escape, a Norwegian band whose biggest influences seem to be Korn and Linkin Park, not Enslaved and Immortal.
Here’s why I find this band kind of interesting. (And moving forward, please be aware that “interesting” and “good” are not the same word.) When you think about it for a second, nu-metal seems to be a predominantly American phenomenon. Off the top of my head, I’m having a hard time even naming a nu-metal band from any part of Europe, never mind Norway. Jeff Killed John were British, but they didn’t get famous ’til they swapped the nu for core and rechristened themselves Bullet for My Valentine. Am I forgetting a really, really obvious band? Korn, Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, Disturbed, Godsmack, Evanescence, Staind, Static-X, Creed, Hed P.E., Snot, P.O.D., Puddle of Mudd, Drowning Pool, Saliva, Coal Chamber, Methods of Mayhem, 40 Below Summer, Sevendust, Ill Nino, Dope, Papa Roach, Soil, The Union Undergound… ALL AMERICAN. What the hell? No wonder the terrorists hate us.
Anyway, thanks to these sperm clots for doing their part in making America look good. Hoo-rah.
-AR
With the Snot semi-reunion basically falling apart before it ever really got off the ground, the band’s remaining members -Mike Doling, John Fahnestock and Jamie Miller – needed to find another meal ticket. But rather than try and re-re-jigger Snot, they’ve decided to move forward under a new name: Tons.
Yes, you read that correctly. They just spelled “Snot” backwards and decided that this would be a good band name. Morons.
As ’90s nu-metal nostalgia reaches its peak (I FUCKING CALLED IT!), the parade of cash-grab nu-metal reunions continues. Joining the ranks of Limp Bizkit, E-Town Concrete, Crazytown, Snot, Cold, Slaves on Dope, and other terrible ear-raping bands I’m surely forgetting, TuneLab.com is reporting that Adema are reuniting and releasing a new DVD. Adema was never really known for much other from a) sucking, b) lead singer Marky Chavez being the half-brother of Korn’s Jonathan Davis. A guy I know once referred to Adema as “Pop-Korn” in casual conversation, and that’s pretty much the most hilarious / accurate thing that could ever be uttered about the band. Not to imply that Korn are genre-bending revolutionaries or anything… but, ya know.
Here’s Adema’s music video for “The Way You Like It” in case you need to be reminded of just how awful they were. I’d completely forgotten about this song… for the better.
At least American Head Charge just called it quits.
-VN
And the Band Played On is a HBO movie about AIDS. “The Band Plays On” is a new song by Snot, and the first ever to feature Tommy Vext on vocals.
Just wanted to get that out there.
Ponder the Freudian nature of Metallica’s new album artwork as you grill hot dogs this weekend. I know I will. Here are the key headlines from the week:
Back in April, I bemoaned the inevitably of a Snot reunion, and a whole bunch of you came to the group’s defense. So while I weep, you can all rejoice: guitarists Mikey Doling and Sonny Mayo (who is in need of some cash after getting his Sevendust pink slip), drummer Jamie Miller and bassist John “Tumor” Fahnestock (worst nickname this side of “Shit Stain”) are reuniting under the Snot moniker for two shows later this year, presumably with more to follow. I’d tell you about those two announced shows, but I don’t want you to go. I’m petty like that. Click to read more…
Sonny Mayo’s sudden expulsion from Sevendust makes me worried that Snot might reunite – I mean, fuck, it almost happened once already just about a year ago.
For those of you lucky enough not to be familiar with Snot, they’re a band that holds a legendary place in the minds of kids who actually like nu metal, since they were poised to join Limp Bizkit as one of their generation’s most annoying bands when front man Lynn Strait died in a car accident in 1998 (I’m not speaking ill of the dead, mind you; I’m just speaking ill of the dead’s shitty music). After Snot disbanded, its various members went on to such craptastic acts as Amen, Invitro, Godsmack, and Hed PE. Hell Mayo’s replacement, Mike Smith, even usurped Wes Borland for the one Limp Suckit album that even Fred Durst’s most ardent supporters seem to think sucks.
ANYWAY, in this day and age when bands like Blind Melon aren’t gonna let a little thing like a dead front man stop them from living their rock n’ roll dreams, I would be in no way surprised if some re-jiggered version of this band tried to figure out a way to cash in. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Here’s Snot’s video for “Stoopid.” Apt description if ever there was one.
[kml_flashembed movie="http://youtube.com/v/6VjJeKoVVM4" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]
Cute dog, right? Yeah. He died in the car crash, too.
-AR
