BORN OF OSIRIS’ CRIBS: A CHILL SPOT FOR BROS WHO LIKE N64 AND BREAKDOWNS
Monday, June 20th, 2011 at 11:00am by Sergeant DIt’s no secret that playing in a real metal band is a one-way, express ticket to poverty, obscurity and involuntary abstinence. I mean, if a legend like poor Lemmy is relegated to a shitty apartment in Hollywood, surrounded by a lifetime’s worth of dinosaur-metal detritus, I shudder to think how depressing the lives of lesser metal losers must be.
On the other hand, bands like Asking Alexandria, Suiside Silence, and Bring Me The Horizon are getting laid, paid and laughing all the way to the bank, much to the chagrin of metal purists. The handwriting is on the wall, and it couldn’t be any more clear: playing anything other than metalcore/deathcore is career suicide.
If you don’t believe me, check out this guided tour of BORN OF OSIRIS’ posh pad in Wheaton, Illinois (AKA The Temple Of Osiris AKA The House That Sumeriancore Built [or leases, at least]).
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