As MetalSucks pensman Sammy O’Hagar so eloquently stated in his review of Amon Amarth’s latest album Twilight of the Thunder God (which comes out tomorrow in the U.S.), the kings of Swedish viking death metal have always justified their outward ridiculousness by backing it up with skull-crushing, top-notch metal. And when it comes to making music videos things are no different; with their epic new video for the album’s title track — which has a full Viking battle reenactment and lots of synchronized head-banging, natch — Amon have created one of the most visually striking and cinematically beautiful videos released in ages, at least to these untrained eyes. Even if frontman Johan Hegg isn’t sporting his usual bare-chested metal chub this time around, at least he’s got his own band’s shirt on, the very definition of epic if you ask me. And oh yeah, did I mention Viking battles? Viking battles!

Speaking of Viking battles, time is running out (as in tomorrow is the deadline) for our Amon Amarth Viking Video Contest, co-sponsored by Metal Injection and Metal Blade. Create your own minute-long Viking reenacement, and a giant stash of Amon swag and booty could be yours. Enter and read the rules here.

Lastly, don’t miss the epicness when it rapes and pillages the shores of North America starting October 1st; catch the MetalSucks co-sponsored Amon Amarth tour with the unfuckwithable lineup of Ensiferum, Belphegor, and The Absence in tow. Dates after the jump. See you there, beer steins in hand. This might actually be the night where I finally where my viking helmet.

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Don’t let the post-weekend hangover get you down; start your week off right by listening a new track from Sweden’s kings of viking metal, Amon Amarth. “Guardians of Asgaard” comes from their new album Twilight of the Thunder God due September 30th on Metal Blade, and the band will kick off a massive North American tour the very next day, which MetalSucks is proud to be sponsoring. Ensiferum, Belphegor, and The Absence will be opening – so ready your beer steins and viking helmets, and check out the full tour routing after the jump. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to enter our Amon Amarth Viking Video Contest to win a huge prize package of Amon Amarth swag.

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After fellating Protest the Hero’s incredible early-2008 release Fortress for two months solid (culminating in my first ever 5 of 5 horns review), I was immediately let down by successive announcements that the band would be touring with shit emo bands through the entire summer. Finally someone in the band’s camp has come to their senses and packaged them with a lineup that will put them in front of the metal audience that NEEDS to know about this band. And finally, I will be able to go see them live. Lambgoat is reporting a fall tour with Protest playing direct support for Unearth, with The Acacia Strain, Whitechapel and Gwen Stacy also on the bill.

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As if this summer’s touring season isn’t already shaping up to be an excellent one — whatwith the likes of Metal Masters (Priest / Heaven and Hell / Motorhead / Testament), the At the Gates reunion, Boris/Torche, and a whole shitload of other great shows — this fall is already shaping up really fuckin’ nicely. This is terrible news for the rest of my social life, but fuck, how can I miss out on these awesome shows?

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We are incredibly bummed to announce that the inaugural run of the MetalSucks-sponsored Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour — which was due to start this week and featured The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean and Rose Funeral — has been canceled. The official explanation we’ve been given is “due to a handful of personal and other issues.”

So, um, this sucks. No ill will towards Metal Blade or any of the fine bands on the tour, as I’m sure whatever reasons got in the way of this tour happening were good ones. But this still blows.

Ah well. Next time. Sorry.

The MetalSucks sponsored Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour, featuring the cream of the crop of Metal Blade Records’ young and upcoming bands, hits the road next week for its inaugural 14-date run. The tour features The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean and Rose Funeral. Are you guys fuckin’ excited for this yet? We’re bummed the tour isn’t coming to NYC, but we’ll have to live vicariously through you guys. Full tour dates are posted after the fold.

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Lucky for you, more dates have been added to this Spring’s Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour, sponsored by MetalSucks, featuring The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean and Rose Funeral. In case you’re a fool and still don’t know about these bands, read Axl’s recent pieces about them, linked above.

MetalSucks.net presents Metal Blade’s Fresh Meat Tour w/ THE ABSENCE, The Destro, Epicurean, and Rose Funeral:
06/19 Richland, NJ Memories Lounge
06/20 Baltimore, MD Sonar
06/21 Albany, NY Valentines
06/22 Niagra Falls, ON The 4555
06/23 Toronto, ON Sneaky Dee’s 19+
06/24 Brampton, ON Spot One
06/25 Sarnia, ON The Polish Alliance Hall
06/26 LaPorte, IN The Next Level
06/27 Troy, OH Staunton Garage
06/28 Detroit, MI Fischer Hall
06/29 Chicago, IL Mojoes Rock House
07/01 Des Moines, IA Vaudeville Mews no Rose Funeral
07/02 St. Louis, MO Rockstar Nightclub no Rose Funeral
07/03 Tulsa, OK The Pinkeye no Rose Funeral
07/06 McAllen, TX Smokin Aces no Rose Funeral

I don’t think there’s anything I could say about Epicurean that would be more elegant than what Kevin Stewart-Panko wrote in the June ’08 issue of Decibel when reviewing the band’s latest album, A Consequence of Design. So I’m just gonna reprint a portion of that review here:

“While every step Epicurean take is drenched in copious melody, it would appear they’re having a hard time deciding whether they want to be Emperor, Dream Theater, Shadows Fall, Children of Bodom or Kalmah. Not that this is a bad thing—or necessarily confusing—as Epicurean’s synthesis is feted by [John] Laramy’s chameleonic vocals, excellent all-around guitar work and keys that artfully balance skill and widdle, with the result being a heck of a lot more interesting than if they just picked one of those individual outfits to emulate. Their synthesis is made all the more potent by their intelligent use of melodies usually heard in Swedish or Norwegian bands, which drape this album in hooks that are as dark and melancholic as they are life-affirming and triumphant; check out ‘The Author and the Architect’ and ‘Illusion.’ But given that they hail from Minnesota—which, according to census figures, might as well be called Little Scandinavia—we shouldn’t be all that surprised.”

Below, check out a fan made video for “The Author and the Architect;” then check out our interview with Epicurean vocalist John Laramy.

MetalSucks.net presents The Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour w/ The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean, and Rose Funeral (more dates TBA):

06/19 Richland, NJ – Memories Lounge
06/20 Baltimore, MD – Sonar
06/21 Albany, NY – Valentines
06/22 Niagara Falls, ON – The 4555
06/25 Sarnia, ON – Polish Alliance Hall
06/26 Laporte, IN – The Next Level
06/27 Troy, OH – Staunton Garage
06/28 Detroit, MI – Fischer Hall
06/30 Minneapolis, MN – TBA
07/01 Des Moines, IA – Vaudeville Mews
07/02 St. Louis, MO – Rockstar Nightclub
07/03 Tulsa, OK – The Pinkeye
07/05 San Antonio, TX – TBA
07/06 McAllen, TX – Smokin’ Ace

-AR

The MetalSucks-sponsored Metal Blade Fresh Meat tour featuring The Absence, the Destro, Epicurean and Rose Funeral now has an official tour flyer. So take this shit and plaster it up on your bathroom stalls, MySpace pages, or wherever. Because this is not a tour to miss!

In case you missed the announcement, all of the bands on this bill fuckin’ destroy. Check out Axl’s pieces on The Absence and The Destro from last week.

-VN

Here’s what I wrote about The Destro back in August, in a piece cleverly entitled “The Destro are Fuckin’ Metal”:

“How fuckin’ metal? So fuckin’ metal that in bar fights they can only bitch slap their opponents, because hitting them with a closed fist is the legal equivalent of beating someone with an aluminum baseball bat. So fuckin’ metal that they piss hot molten lead and shit lug nuts. So fuckin’ metal that the first thing they do every morning is lather themselves in WD-40. So fuckin’ metal that if they go out in the rain, they rust. So fuckin’ metal that if they go to the beach, they can’t go into the ocean because they’ll sink right to the bottom. So fuckin’ metal that Unearth frontman Trevor Phipps signed them to his Ironclad label after he discovered them during a mining expedition. So fuckin’ metal that they readily loses electrons to form positive ions, and if you put them in a room with a non-metal band, they’d form an ionic bond.”

Still apples, dude. Still applies.

Here’s their video for “Beast Burden.”

MetalSucks.net presents The Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour w/ The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean, and Rose Funeral (more dates TBA):

06/19 Richland, NJ – Memories Lounge
06/20 Baltimore, MD – Sonar
06/21 Albany, NY – Valentines
06/22 Niagara Falls, ON – The 4555
06/25 Sarnia, ON – Polish Alliance Hall
06/26 Laporte, IN – The Next Level
06/27 Troy, OH – Staunton Garage
06/28 Detroit, MI – Fischer Hall
06/30 Minneapolis, MN – TBA
07/01 Des Moines, IA – Vaudeville Mews
07/02 St. Louis, MO – Rockstar Nightclub
07/03 Tulsa, OK – The Pinkeye
07/05 San Antonio, TX – TBA
07/06 McAllen, TX – Smokin’ Ace

-AR

Are you guys seriously not excited about the MetalSucks sponsored Metal Blade Fresh Meat tour? If that’s the case, then I’m fairly sure it’s just because you’re not down with The Absence, and by “down with,” I mean “have heard at least one of their songs.” ‘Cause if you’ve ever heard a song by The Absence, then you’d know that, in the words of MetalSucks reader attackmole, the band is “tiiiiiiiiiiight.”

So below is the video for the title track from their Erik Rutan-produced 2005 Metal Blade debut, From Your Grave. Produced by the legendary Erik Rutan, it is one of the best European melodic death metal albums I’ve ever heard by a band not actually from Europe. ‘Cause this band is actually from Florida, where they recorded this album with producer Erik Rutan. Also, did I mention it was produced by ERIK FUCKING RUTAN?

MetalSucks.net presents The Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour w/ The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean, and Rose Funeral (more dates TBA):

06/19 Richland, NJ – Memories Lounge
06/20 Baltimore, MD – Sonar
06/21 Albany, NY – Valentines
06/22 Niagara Falls, ON – The 4555
06/25 Sarnia, ON – Polish Alliance Hall
06/26 Laporte, IN – The Next Level
06/27 Troy, OH – Staunton Garage
06/28 Detroit, MI – Fischer Hall
06/30 Minneapolis, MN – TBA
07/01 Des Moines, IA – Vaudeville Mews
07/02 St. Louis, MO – Rockstar Nightclub
07/03 Tulsa, OK – The Pinkeye
07/05 San Antonio, TX – TBA
07/06 McAllen, TX – Smokin’ Ace

-AR

We didn’t lead you astray with the MetalSucks co-sponsored Paganfest, and we certainly wouldn’t dare do so with any other tour we put our name on. We are extremely proud to announce that MetalSucks will be sponsoring this Spring’s ‘Metal Blade Fresh Meat’ tour, featuring Metal Blade young guns The Absence, Ironclad Recordings’ The Destro, as well as Epicurean and Rose Funeral! Get pumped. And get ready to get sick of hearing us talk about this tour.

MetalSucks.net presents The Metal Blade Fresh Meat Tour w/ The Absence, The Destro, Epicurean, and Rose Funeral (more dates TBA):

06/19 Richland, NJ – Memories Lounge
06/20 Baltimore, MD – Sonar
06/21 Albany, NY – Valentines
06/22 Niagara Falls, ON – The 4555
06/25 Sarnia, ON – Polish Alliance Hall
06/26 Laporte, IN – The Next Level
06/27 Troy, OH – Staunton Garage
06/28 Detroit, MI – Fischer Hall
06/30 Minneapolis, MN – TBA
07/01 Des Moines, IA – Vaudeville Mews
07/02 St. Louis, MO – Rockstar Nightclub
07/03 Tulsa, OK – The Pinkeye
07/05 San Antonio, TX – TBA
07/06 McAllen, TX – Smokin’ Ace