As you probably know by now, Jucifer live on the road — literally! A truly mobile unit, the savage sludge metal duo are North American nomads who rest their head nightly in the same RV that gets them from show to show. So I was surprised to learn that Jucifer were crossing the pond for a headlining tour of Europe and Russia, which, unless they plan on hopping a ferry, implies that they’d be leaving their trusty vehicle behind. That’s probably as close to a vacation as Jucifer ever get!

The full list of dates are below, and most are supported by Italian metallers The Orange Man Theory, whose latest record was produced by Today Is The Day figurehead Steve Austin. There are a few festivals in the mix as well, including Wroclaw, Poland’s Asymmetry Fest (with Electric Wizard and the reunited Godflesh) and the Belgian Durbuy Rock Festival (with Korpiklaani and Triptykon). If you’re lucky enough to live close to any of these cities, here’s a super-duper rare opportunity to catch one of the noisiest bands around. Buy some merch from them as well, so they can buy souvenirs and finance a forthcoming re-release of the 1994 cassette-only Nadir EP, re-mastered by Scott Hull.

Now how are they gonna get all those amps overseas? Hmmm…

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So hopefully you remember the incredibly awesome “Create Your Own Conspiracy” Contest we hosted with Nevermore last year, in which reader Ben Robson ultimately got to stand on stage with the band in front of a real live paying audience and sing his own version of the title track from The Obsidian Conspiracy. When Ben won that contest, his buddy, film student Kyle Heider, made a killer little mini-documentary chronicling Ben’s entire experience, which you can and should watch here. And since that time, Ben has proven that his winning was no fluke — he’s a really, really talented dude.

Well, as it turns out, Kyle ain’t no slouch either.

Via e-mail, Kyle tells me:

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So, I don’t like all the Celtic Frost albums I’m supposed to as much as I should. I mean, don’t get me wrong: To Mega Therion? Awesome. Monotheist? Excellent return to form. Triptykon’s debut? Motherfucker’s still got it, gym pants, eyeliner and all. But they don’t hit me like a great album’s supposed to hit you. What does, though, is Morbid Tales. Raw and primitive but not apathetic and sloppy, it rides that line between doom, black metal, and thrash on a fleet of mammoths (well, mostly because none of those things really existed in earnest yet). So while they would go on to do more interesting things as well as hilarious things (Cold Lake, of course), to my ears, none of what the band did (and, who are we kidding, are doing with Triptykon) is nearly as fierce or, arguably, as satisfying as Morbid Tales.

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MetalSucks is oh-so-very happy to be teaming up with RED Distribution to bring you, our most beloved readers, the MetalSucks Fan Pack, which will be available exclusively at all FYE stores starting this Tuesday, April 12. Not only does this limited edition box full o’ metal come with a CD featuring twenty brootal tunes by twenty brootal bands (including Kvelertak, Trap Them, Believer, Napalm Death, TesseracT, Thomas Giles, Deicide and a bunch more) but it also comes with that HOLY SHIT THAT IS SO KILLER t-shirt you see above, which was designed by our friend Rodney Githens from Vertebrae 33 (you might also recognize his work from this sexy t-shirt and this Louvre-worthy poster that he did for us).

How much would you expect to pay for this incredible package? Twenty bucks? Fifteen bucks? Try $9.99. That’s right, gang — twenty songs from twenty bands and that guaranteed-to-get-you-laid t-shirt for under ten bucks.

But wait! There’s more! If you act now and head over to the official MetalSucks Fan Pack web page, you can get a coupon for 30%, which brings the price down to a mere seven dollars. Holy crap, that’s a metsieh if ever there was one.

So go here to get a complete track list of all the bands on the comp, and to use the nifty store-finder to locate the f.y.e. nearest to you. And, oh yeah, you can also enter to win this custom guitar:

So, yeah, that’s pretty fuckin’ bad-assed.

-Axl & Vince

Even this little kid can’t believe this shit.

Ever since The Deciblog started their weekly “Justify Your Shitty Taste” column — in which writers and musicians attempt to defend the indefensible — we’ve been joking that it was only a matter of time until someone stood up for Celtic Frost’s Cold Lake.

Ladies and germs, that time has arrived.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

This week’s question was once again suggested by “Hipsters Out of Metal!” columnist Anso DF, and even though the Grammy nominations were actually announced last week, it still seemed like a fun debate to have. So:

WHAT ARE YOUR NOMINATIONS FOR BEST METAL GRAMMY?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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This simple-yet-visceral guitar solo makes me its bitch every time I hear it.

As the end of the year draws closer and closer, we’ve been spending an increasing amount of time debating which metal albums were the best of 2010; indeed, the staff of MetalSucks will all post our “Best Of” lists next Thursday, December 16, right before we shut down for the holidays. (And don’t worry, there’ll be a reader’s poll, too.) But while that argument flames on, Listmaster General Carlos Ramirez has stirred up some shit of a whole different color over at Noisecreep, posting that site’s list of 10 best songs of 2010.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, which means we’re taking off early today and won’t be back ’til Monday. We’re sorry to leave non-American readers high n’ dry, but PLUS ONE FOR FREEDOM, MOTHERFUCKERS.

ANYWAY, in honor of the holiday, we decided to do a special Turkey Day-themed QOTW designed to make you feel all warm and cuddly inside:

WHAT (IN METAL) ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

This week, inspired by Axl’s current ailment, we asked our writers:

WHAT IS THE BEST METAL TO LISTEN TO WHEN YOU’RE SICK?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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BADABOOM! We promised you more awesomeness from Triptykon today, and here it is: an exclusive stream of Shatter: Eparistera Daimones Accompanied, the new EP from the legendary Tom G. Warrior’s incredible new band, a full week before its October 26 release via Century Media. Featuring three previously-unreleased songs from the Eparistera Daimones studio sessions, plus two covers of classic Celtic Frost tracks recorded live during the band’s headlining set at The Netherlands’ Roadburn Festival this past April, Shatter is just more proof that Triptykon are now a major creative force in the metal world.

Stream the EP below, and then go pre-order yourself a copy. You can also check out the killer video for the title track here. And don’t forget that Triptykon are continuing their U.S. tour with 1349 and Yakuza through the end of the month; get remaining dates here.

[this streaming promotion has ended]

Hey, it’s time for another edition of “Cinemetal Round-Up,” in which I lump a bunch of new metal videos together rather than write individual posts for each one! YYYYAAAAAYYYYY!!!!

First up today we have Triptykon’s video for “Shatter,” the title track from their new, five-song EP, which comes out next week. I don’t know what to say about about this video other than “It looks really, really cool.” Tom G. Warrior apparently came up with the concept himself, which shouldn’t surpirse anyone, and director Philipp Hirsch did an awesome job with the execution. It’s a great song, too! If you love it as much as we do, check back later today for more extra-special Triptykonian goodness, exclusively here at MetalSucks.

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Photo by Chris Roo

Back in August, I got a chance to talk with Yakuza front man Bruce Lamont about all things Yakuza, his band’s stellar new album, Of Seismic Consequence (which is a contender for this curmudgeon’s year-end “Best Of” list), his upcoming side projects and collaborations, his other fellow musicians from the Windy City, and Yakuza’s then not-yet-announced tour with Triptykon and 1349 — a tour that is now under way.

Unfortunately, then the Bob Cock penchant for procrastination kicked in. But whilst Yakuza are still in the midst of the aforementioned tour (get dates here), I present you with the always charming Mr. Lamont’s take on…well, just about anything he’s involved in nowadays – including an upcoming solo album.

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Video by popas7

After Celtic Frost disbanded and Tom G. Warrior announced the formation of Triptykon, he assured fans that his new project  ”will sound as close to Celtic Frost as is humanly possible.” That wasn’t just self-serving hype: Triptykon is not Celtic Frost in name only.

Seeing Triptykon live highlights this fact: Their set last Thursday evening here in Manhattan (with co-headliners 1349, who, unfortunately, I missed) was dominated by songs spanning the entire spectrum of Celtic Frost’s catalog, including Morbid Tales (“Circle of Tyrants,” “Dethroned Emperor”), Into the Pandemonium (“Babylon Fell”), and Monotheist (“Synagoga Satanae”). Triptykon might have new members, but they’re not a new band; they’re Celtic Frost with a very intense-looking woman, Vanja Slajh, playing bass instead of a very intense-looking man, Martin Eric Ain.

And will due respect to Ain, you probably won’t miss him.

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You should all know who the artist Vincent Castiglia is. Earlier this year, he collaborated with no less a legend than H.R. Giger on the album art for Triptykon’s Eparistera Daimones, and anyone who has the approval of Giger and Tom G. Warrior should be aces in your book. But in case that’s not enough proof of Castiglia’s metal cred for you, check this out: dude paints exclusively in his own blood. I can’t think of anything more metal.

Of course, Castiglia’s choice of materials would just be a gimmick if he wasn’t also really, really talented. Castiglia’s work is insanely detailed — you have to get right up close to really appreciate it — really beautiful, and really, really fucked up. And I mean that as high praise.

If you live in or near Toronto, Castiglia is getting his first Canadian exhibition, Sacrifices For The Sanguinary Age, from September 10 through October 10 at Meta Gallery. He’ll also be giving a talk at the gallery this Saturday, September 11, from 1 – 3 pm. Like I said, the guy’s work is really stellar, so if you’re in a position to go, you totally should. This is a rare moment when I wished I lived in Toronto.

To be put on the preview list for this exhibition or for further information, email Jody Polishchuk at jp@metagallery.com.

-AR

Triptykon’s debut, Eparistera Daimones, just came out earlier this year, and I imagine it will end up near the top of many year-end lists (including my own); but the band is doing a U.S. tour in October, and I guess in the name of having something brand-spankin’ new to promote (’cause some people can’t be bothered to remember what came out in February), they’ve announced that they’ll release a new EP, Shatter, via Century on October 26. It will consist of three previously unreleased tracks from the Eparistera Daimones recording sessions, plus live covers of the Celtic Frost classics “Circle of the Tyrants” and “Dethroned Emperor.”

And I’m sure the live covers will be great and all — I mean, Tom G. Warrior did write ‘em in the first place, so unless he went all Slash on us and added a rap section, it’s hard for me to see Triptykon fucking those up — but honestly, I’m just really, really super-stoked for the new original material. (Although I hated the demo version of one of those songs, “Crucifixus,” having heard how awesome the group ended up being, I’m willing to give the final recording of the track another chance.) I still listen to ED constantly, and the chorus of “A Thousand Lies”  (“DDDDDDDDDDIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!”) has become my strangle-a-hooker-to-death anthem of the year (not to be confused with my barfight anthem of the year, Lair of the Minotaur’s “Let’s Kill These Motherfuckers”). So, yeah, I will happily take three more songs… thanks!

-AR

So that rumored North American tour with Triptykon, 1349 and Yakuza is no longer a rumor — it’s a really real thing with confirmed dates. Which is sweet! It’s a great line-up. And they’re all touring behind strong albums. Also, hopefully I’ll now get to live out my fantasy of screaming “DDDDDDDDIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!” along with a few hundred other metal fans when Triptykon play “A Thousand Lies.”

Here are dates:

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I woke up this morning to see a post on Crustcake celebrating the news that Triptykon will tour with 1349 and Yakuza later this year — and that said tour will include a handful of U.S. dates. This would obviously be a terrific tour — Eparistera Daimones is still one of the best albums of 2010.

The only thing is — and I don’t mean to cast dispersions on Crustcake, a site I love — I’m not sure where the heck this info is coming from. As I write this, we haven’t received any press release here at the MetalSucks Mansion, I haven’t seen the news reported anywhere else, and the MySpace pages for Triptykon, 1349, and Yakuza all lack the American tour dates in question.

So did Crustcake get an inside scoop? It’s entirely possible. We’ll wait (and pray!) for official confirmation from the band before we get too excited… but in the meantime, here are the dates Crustcake is reporting:

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The walls of Duff’s in Brooklyn are literally covered from floor to ceiling in various metal memorabilia and not-necessarily-metal-per-se-but-still-awesome artwork; there’s everything from signed Slayer shit to a vintage Alien poster to pictures of titties to tons of H.R. Giger art. (Including an incredible table made by Giger, which was so beautiful that I was kind of horrified that we were all putting our drinks on it. I mean, I know that’s what it’s there for, but come ON – it’s Giger, people!) And at least one of the prints we were all admiring last night was by the New York artist Vincent Castiglia, who has become a protégé of Giger’s (the two worked on the incredible art for Triptykon’s Epsasjsdf Daimonosasjkasd or whatever it’s called together) and who – get this – paints with his own blood. Which immediately qualifies him as one of the most metal artists ever.

Now our bro-bros at Metal Injection have launched a new series, entitled “Spotlight,” which intends to “put the focus on some our favorite people within the scene that aren’t necessarily in a band, but contribute to other aspects of the scene.” The inaugural episode is about Castiglia, who’s as interesting a character as you’d expect. Check it out below.

-AR

It doesn’t feel like spring out today – it feels like summer. The sun has been going down later and later and the weather has been getting nicer and nicer, and now, all of sudden, it’s 90 (!) degrees out. I don’t think it will last all that long – the East Coast often gets one last snowstorm in April before the nice weather begins in earnest – but it has made for some very relaxing, long walks as of late. (Not hurting: that the ladies of NYC have wasted no time adjusting their wardrobes appropriately. It’s like a Rock of Love casting call out there, except, mercifully, with fewer surgical “enhancements.”)

The problem is, when the doom n’ gloom of metal is your music of choice, it can be hard to find an appropriate soundtrack for such a beautiful day.

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