MetalSucks

In honor of Alaskan metalcore band 36 Crazyfists’ new DVD, Under a Northern Sky (in stores October 27), a list of 35 other famous, metal, heavy, and/or crazy fists:

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For a horribly misguided, washed-up hair-metal star who compared Barack Obama to Hitler, it turns out that Blackie Lawless can still kick out the jams. Not only is Blackie Lawless still alive but apparently W.A.S.P have a new album called Babylon coming out on October 12th. Here’s the new single, “Crazy,” sent in by longtime MS Maniac Steve Stamopoulos. And you know what? It ain’t bad.

-VN

I’m usually anti-cover album – what’s the point, really? – but I have to admit that I’m more than a little curious to hear Children of Bodom’s Skeletons in the Closet… but mostly for non-metal or not-really-metal reasons. I mean, I’m sure that COB can pull off Slayer and Sepultura songs without breaking a sweat, but what’s it gonna sound like when Alexi and company do Creedence? Kenny Rogers? Pat Benatar? Their Brit-Brit cover (which will be on the new disc) sounded surprisingly Bodom-like, as though the Reigning White Trash Queen of Pop had never even existed. And can you think of another melodeathrash band more suited to do hair metal covers of Poison and W.A.S.P.?

So. Skeletons in the Closet comes out September 23 on Spinefarm. The band is now streaming two new re-makes, of Suicidal Tendencies’ “War Inside My Head” and Billy Idol’s “Rebel Yell,” on their MySpace page. Throw back a few shots and play ‘em loud. That’s how COB would want it, motherfuckers.

-AR

This is Blackie Lawless talking about Barack Obama in Classic Rock magazine (via Blabbermouth):

“He’s one of these old-time 60s radicals from way back. He thinks he’s going to change the world and he’s hell-bent on doing that. When he stood there the night of the nomination and he said that he intended on ‘fundamentally changing’ America – a chill ran down my back. Thousands of people were just standing there, wildly applauding, and it reminded me of Hitler standing on the steps of the Reichstag.”

Here’s what went through my mind imediately after I read this:

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Thanks to our bro-bros at Metal Injection for bringing to our attention that one of the greatest metal documentaries of all time, Penelope Spheeris’  The Decline of Western Civilization Part II: The Metal Years, is now available online, in its entirety, absolutely free (And FYI, in case ya didn’t know – Spheeris would go on to direct another classic of cinemetal, the original Wayne’s World.).

For some reason this 1988 classic – which includes amazing interviews with Ozzy Osbourne, Lemmy, Steven Tyler, Taime Down, Riki Rachtman, Bill Gazzarri, members of Poison, Kiss, and Armored Saint, and, most infamously, a very, very, very drunk Chris Holmes of W.A.S.P. – isn’t available on DVD, and I honestly don’t even know anyone who owns a VHS player anymore. So if for some reason you’ve never seen this film, you MUST watch it now – especially since I’m fairly certain that this is not a legal rip. Watch it now before the lawyers take it down.

-AR

Former buzzsaw cod-piece wearing, red meat slinging, naked woman whipping, beast fucker Blackie Lawless of 80’s second-tier hair metal has-beens W.A.S.P. is currently frothing rabid saliva in the mouth over the latest threat to the U.S. of A.: Barack Obama.

Last week, Lawless displayed his current addiction to rabid right-wing talking points when he posted an anti-Obama screed on W.A.S.P.’s website here. Apparently, Blackie has been hiding out in his Topanga Canyon mansion near the Pacific Ocean, in the den of liberalism, with four televisions turned to Fox News, seven stereos blaring out Rush Limbaugh, and four computers and two laptops with The Drudge Report on his screens

Here are some red meaty chunks provided by Lawless in his rant:

This man is a product of that Extreme Leftist – Marxist movement that has been building in this country for over 40 years. He is a product of the Harvard far left. He is the face and mouthpiece of a movement that is Hell Bent on breaking up the U. S. Constitution and reassembling it to conform to their vision. He is a lawyer, the Democratic Johnny Cochran, in which every time he speaks gives a closing argument. He is the embodiment of the New Democratic Machine.

and this:

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