Dude, I dunno WHAT the fuck is going on today. I overslept, which is really unlike me; it’s, like, “Moses go build an ark!” raining; Sacha the Death Metal Puppy is going nuts, growling at something I can’t even see; and I can hear a crazy amount of sirens outside, plus some dude barking orders on a megaphone. If I was a paranoid person, I’d say that 5-0 was about to break down my door any second; instead, I’ll just chalk it up to the fact that there’s gonna be a full moon tonight.

At least when shit is going crazy, we’ll have some new Woe of Tyrants to act as the soundtrack by which we burn this fucker down. The band’s latest, Threnody, comes out two weeks from today, and the band is now streaming a new song, “Singing Surrender,” here. It would be awesome if the song were about doing Cheap Trick at the karaoke bar, but, alas, I think vocalist Chris Catanzaro probably had something else on his mind. Still a good song, though. I’m digging the “Epic”-like piano outro.

Threnody comes out April 14 on Metal Blade.

-AR

I’m really, really disappointed in you, male MetalSucksians. After reader Ashley sent in some epic photos of herself in a MetalSucks hoodie and not very much else, I predicted we’d get an identical pic from a wise-ass dude by the end of the week. Nope. Either no one thought of it, or no one had the balls to do it. For shame. And now what are the three ladies who actually read this site to look at? Pics of Lars Ulrich’s dick?

Oh well. Here are some other things that happened this week:

• We debuted new music by Daughters, Woe of Tyrants, Stigma and Nails.
• As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa wondered “Who is coming to the island on L O S T?”, while Eyal pondered whether it’s better to burn out or fade away.
• We listened to the God of War EP and new releases by Shining, Burzum, and H.I.M.
• Antonin Skullia taught us about the law of Metalocalypse.
• Did this shitty Matthew Fox show steal The Haunted’s logo?

And next week I expect you, our beloved readers, to be back up to your usual level of witty repartee.

-AR

Woe Of Tyrants’ new album Threnody will be in the hands of fans by April 14th, but today you can get a taste of the shredtacular madness here.

Comments Woe of Tyrants vocalist Chris Catanzaro of the new song “Tempting the Wretch”:

This song was written to describe a point in Threnody in which our traveler is within a dream, a dream that is one of the few points in his journey where he experiences any semblance of peace and serenity. The walls begins to crumble around him, pieces of his true hellish reality breaking through in the form of fiendish and wiley beasts poised to torment and destroy him. As he is wrestling with morality, and whispers from those who mean to cause him harm, he ends up dancing amongst the dead and damned under a burning sky of sulfur rain. That part of the song is him momentarily “embracing the filth”, and joining in with the torment. The song describes the fear of completely abandoning God, as well as the temptation to do so. At the end of the song he awakens from the dream, with only a cold and cryptic sense of disarray remaining.

Yes, I know, there is a tiny bit of clean singing. I meant to avoid it on this record, but the part didn’t work any other way to fit the message and mood I was going for. Hate on it all you want, but I assure you that we made the rest of this song chaotic and disgusting enough to not have a chance of making us millions. Much love, and we appreciate MetalSucks as always for supporting our group.

Pre-order Threnody for only $12 and listen to another new song, “Creatures of the Mire.” We haven’t heard the full album yet but the two new songs posted so far have us excited.

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Everyone in the goddman motherfucking world e-mailed me about this yesterday so I’m sure you know, but just in case: perennial MetalSucks faves Woe of Tyrants have released a crushing new song, “Creatures of the Mire,” which you can listen to here. It features all manner of awesomeness.

“Creatures of the Mire”comes off of Woe of Tyrants’ third album overall/second for Metal Blade, Threnody, which on April 13. And even though metal bands need to stop using the word “threnody,” I’m still fairly certain that this record is going to rule.

-AR

We loved the last tour blog that Bison B.C.’s Dan And did for us so much, we’re only all-too-happy to present another! Below, please enjoy part 1; check back tomorrow for part 2!

Sep 11 ’09 (Vancouver BC @ Commodore)

I always love kicking off a tour with a show in Vancouver. It’s great to have one last chance to get completely loser pissed with our friends before we hit the road for however long. This time we were fortunate enough to finally share the stage with local good ‘ol boys The Golers and old pals 3 Inches of Blood. The Golers have been around forever and everyone should fucking hear them. They’re basically Vancouver’s Venomous Concept: relentless, break-neck speed pummeling. Is grind-punk a genre?

Show was fucking fun as all hell. It was 3 Inches record release show for Here Waits Thy Doom (which may or may not feature all of us doing backups on the song “Preacher’s Daughter”) and the place was packed! The cap of the Commodore is somewhere between 950 and 1000 and apparently it was like 15 tickets away from being sold out. Jesse from local grinders Zuckuss pointed out how fucking crazy it is that three local bands brought that many metal heads out of the woodwork. The night was bitter sweet though because not only was our good friend Ian unable to be there because of surgery but that night would also be my last chance to ever set foot in local punk/metal institution the Cobalt. I can’t even describe how awesome that bar and the staff are. The thought that it’s getting shut down by the fucking slum lords that own the building so they can cash in on Olympic fever makes me wanna tear someone’s head off. I’m consoled by the fact that I know bar legend/honcho Wendy 13 will soon enough have a new venue I can crawl out of at 5am reeking of Jager bombs. COBALT FOREVER!
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Hey, lookit that! After their last, incredibly silly video, for “Drowning in Mud,” God Dethroned have returned with a new video “Poison Fog,” that kicks all kinds of ass. It’s not just a dude running around in a field! Hoo-ray!

And just in time for their MetalSucks co-sponsored tour with Augury, Woe of Tyrants and Abigail Williams! SCORE!

God Dethroned’s Passiondale is out now on Metal Blade. It’s killer. Go check it out.

-AR

God Dethroned will be assaulting North America for the first time since 2007 on the headlining War Propaganda World Tour 2009 in support of their newest album, Passiondale (recipient of four-out-of-five horns on MetalSucks!). Vocalist/guitarist Henri Sattler and co. will embark on the coast to coast campaign starting on September 30th. Joining the MetalSucks, SMNnews.com and MetalInjection.net-sponsored march will be Abigail Williams, Augury and labelmates Woe Of Tyrants. MetalSucks and SMNnews will be giving away tickets to shows and MetalInjection will be posting video updates from God Dethroned as they tour across the US. Stay tuned for details as they become available.

Sattler comments on the tour: “The second leg of the tour [the first leg was in Europe] starts on September 30th in Tucson, Arizona with Abigail Williams, Augury and label mates Woe of Tyrants and leads us through the States up to Canada. We are really excited to tour the U.S. again and to promote our latest album “Passiondale”, which was released last April. Our last show in the U.S. was in 2007 so we can’t wait to see many of our fans again soon!

Full list of tour dates after the jump.

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Now the nausea’s
In my guts
And I’m wrestling with doubt
The kind you get when your heroes
Sell you out
And as I watch the drawbridge come down
There’s mass extinction
On my mind
Human cruelty stains my thoughts jet black
I’ve got this feeling
Like things have gone too far and now we can’t get back

Here’s more fun shit that happened in the world of metal this week:

• We debuted new videos from Cradle of Filth and Arsonists Get All the Girls.
• We got exclusive tour blogs from Bison B.C.’s Dan And and Woe of Tyrants’ Chris Catanzaro.
• We spoke to members of Winds of Plague, Decrepit Birth and Born of Osiris.
• I counted down 50 things I love about Pig Destroyer, and then added a 51st.
• Ulrich Vs. Mustaine Vs. Ian and Zakk Vs. Ozzy made us laugh with glee.
• Kerry King Vs. Killswitch Engage was pretty funny, too.
• Dallas Coyle answered more of your questions.

Vince gets back from vacation tonight right around the time Repulsion take the stage, and then tomorrow, hopefully, Craig’s List will lead us to some Tool tickets. See ya Monday!

-AR

Due to an unfortunate accident in which guitarist/vocalist Dan Gapen broke his hand, Lazarus A.D. will be forced to miss the final few dates of the MetalSucks co-sponsored Baptized in Beer tour.

We wish Dan a speedy recovery, and hopefully we’ll see him out on the road in the not-too-distant future.

And while this sucks, it shouldn’t discourage anyone from going to the shows, ’cause you just know that Bison B.C. and Woe of Tyrants are gonna continue to murder it.

Here are the remaining dates of the tour:

July 31 2009 – San Jose CA @ Voodoo Lounge
Aug 1 2009 – Portland OR @ Ash St Saloon
Aug 2 2009 – Seattle WA @ El Corazon

If you haven’t done so already, check out our special Baptized in Beer tour blogs from Bison B.C.’s Dan And and Woe of Tyrants’ Chris Catanzaro.

Bison B.C. are currently out on the road as part of the MetalSucks co-sponsored Baptized in Beer tour with  Lazarus A.D. and Woe of Tyrants. Bison B.C.’s Dan And was cool enough to offer to do a special tour blog for us. Check it out below, and get complete Baptized in Beer tour dates here! And if you haven’t done so already, check out Woe of Tyrants’ Chris Catanzaro Baptized in Beer tour blog here.

Wednesday, July 8th – Vancouver, The Biltmore

The last time we played here at the Biltmore, it ended up getting shut down by no fault of ours. The fire marshal showed up, and not was the show over-sold, but something wasn’t properly sorted out about some renovations that had been done. I’m really not sure on the details and despite how it might have looked or been reported on, it wasn’t our fault. I jokingly said in a mini interview that we were going to top ourselves this time and burn it to the ground. Apparently some fuckin’ pecker head taken me seriously and emailed the owners to protest that they would even let us play there after I said that. I’m pretty sure the one owner, Zach, wasn’t upset because when we meet him in Calgary a few days from now he gets us some free grub at one of his other bars and then gets us firkin hammered on a disgustingly delicious drink he invented… more on that later.

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Woe of Tyrants are currently out on the road as part of the MetalSucks co-sponsored Baptized in Beer tour with Bison B.C. and Lazarus A.D. Woe of Tyrants vocalist Chris Catanzaro was cool enough to offer to do a special tour blog for us. Check it out below, and get complete Baptized in Beer tour dates here!

Hey everyone, just checking in from Gallup, NM where we played Monday night on the Baptized in Beer tour with Bison B.C. and Lazarus A.D. It was our first time playing on a Native American reservation, and I hope it’s not the last because those kids knew how to party and support the tour. Kickass times!

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By all accounts Bison B.C. and Lazarus A.D. are kicking total ass on the MetalSucks-sponsored Baptized in Beer Tour. The bands wrap up the Canadian leg of the tour on July 16th, and from there kick off the U.S. leg in St. Paul, MN, after which they’ll hook up with Woe Of Tyrants a few days later in Raleigh, NC for the duration.

Bison vocalist/guitarists James Gnarwell had this to say: “We have truly been baptized in beer so far… All of our clothes, the van, and every stage thus far has been soaked in our most favorite beverage… Glorious beer. All kinds of beer: from the finest ales and lagers to the dingiest piss you can stomach and we love it all. Can’t wait to slay south of the border and continue our liver olympics. See you in the future.”

Check out the rippin’ footage of Bison B.C. performing “Medication” live at the sold out Vancouver date below, then take a look at the remaining tour dates after the jump so you can get your beer on. This live footage… I mean, like, woah; if this doesn’t make you wish you were at that show rockin’ out up front, might we suggest this?

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MetalSucks is thrilled to premier the brand new music video for Metal Blade Records artists Woe of Tyrants. The track, “Golgotha,” comes from the record Kingdom of Might, released in January of this year. The music video was directed by Jake Beemer of Siege Media.

Says vocalist Chris Catanzaro, “We have worked with Jake and Siege Media twice now, and it’s very exciting for us to see a young company develop between two videos shot in such a close proximity. We feel Jake and the crew captured the mood and excitement that we’d envisioned for this song and we’re excited to premier it with our friends at Metalsucks and Metal Injection for all of you to enjoy as well. Big thanks as always to our friends at Siege Media for tireless efforts and quick turnarounds and also the warehouse in Detroit, MI where the video was shot!”

Check it out below.

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Canadian metalers Bison B.C. and Wisconsin thrashers Lazarus A.D. have teamed up for the MetalSucks and MetalInjection-sponsored 2009 “Baptized in Beer Tour,” which kicks off July 8th in Vancouver, British Columbia. Support on select dates will come from Barnburner and Woe of Tyrants. The coming together of B.C. and A.D. means one of two things will happen when this tour hits the pavement: 1) the birth of Jesus Christ, 2) a giant fucking party. We’re hoping for the latter!

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