CRYPTOPSY KEYBOARDIST EXPLAINS HER DEPARTURE IN PERFECT ENGLISH
Maggy Durand, the keyboardist who had the unfortunate task of being Cryptopsy’s first female member at a time when the band was already under siege for allegedly being “sell-outs,” has left the group. She explains on her MySpace page in a post entitled “Maggy Left Cryptopsy, All the Truth!!!”:
“You guys never saw me on stage, interview and videos with Cryptopsy because, both of us decided that it was better for me to leave the band for many reasons, but the principal one is money problems. Many years ago, I put that little picture on my [Vampire Freaks] profile that says that ‘Every time you steal music, god kills a kitten…’ I WAS THAT FUCKING KITTEN, YOU, STUPID ASSHOLES DOWNLOADERS AND THERE IS NO GOD!!! Yes, I assure you, downloading music unfortunately kills great artists. Everyone in the media/entertainment industries is really worrying about the problem. So, because of it, I didn’t have the luck to experiment what’s a video clip realization, neither what’s a world tour, but my tracks [are] on the [just-released Cryptopsy] album and I still really glad about it: The Unspoken King, SO BUY IT IF YOU LIKE IT. For the orther bands who says in their little monkey mind: OMG! She’s free to be in an other band… Before to get involved as a keyboarder/samplist/back vocal in an other band, I’ll do and wear a five-meter-long necklace made with my own intestines and wear my ex-boyfriend’s bloody nuts as ear buckles before it… So it means I never want to be involved in a band again until I’m classified as music arranger or music composer by contract for them. This adventure doesn’t bored me at all about music, I still working on my company (still very slow, but in progress) and may accept any contract for film/video games music scoring, band intros/arrangements/compositions, piano show (in Quebec province, except if pay is really interesting…) So, I finished my explanation right here, hope you still enjoy my songs and ‘Don’t worry, be happy’ (Did you know that the author of this hit actually kill himself one day after writing it? Paradox…)”
Well, first of all, I’d like to congratulate Maggy on graduating from The Vivian Slaughter School of English. Either that, or she’s like one of those kids in high school who thinks that Babel Fish really will do all their foreign language homework for them (“Oh, boo-hoo, that’s not cool, Axl,” I can just hear you saying. Blow me.).
In all seriousness, though, Maggy makes a valid point about the way illegal downloading harms smaller artists; at this point, nothing could really put a dent in Metallica’s finances, but working class musicians like Maggy are potentially screwed by a lack of album sales.
That being said… I’m not sure how moving units would have helped Maggy in her particular situation. If she was so broke that she couldn’t even stick with the band for their pre-release video shoot, and this band’s record sales were never gonna be super high to begin with, then waiting X amount of days for Y amount of royalties wasn’t gonna help.
That’s my cynical and unsubtle way of suggesting that Maggy was booted from the band because, as I said before, they were coming under lots of fire for a perceived change in sound, and for having a woman in the band. I doubt if we’ll ever know if that’s what really happened or not, but, hey, this is the internet; we can indulge in pointless speculation and rumor mongering ’til the cows come home (or Chinese Democracy is released – whichever happens first).