Alright. These three albums have little in common besides the fact that a) they’re all death-y and b) I’ve been meaning to tell you all to check them out. So here we go…

  1. LANDMINE MARATON, RUSTED EYES AWAKE (LEVEL PLANE): You know what this album makes me think about? Raw hamburger meat. I don’t know why, it just does. ANYWAY, this album is crazy short – eight songs in thirty-two minutes flat – but that’s fine ’cause it leaves you wanting more and its short length lends itself to a silly amount of repeat listens, Reign in Blood style. Speaking of Slayer, I imagine Kerry King would fucking love this band – it seems pretty clear that Seasons in the Abyss is this outfit’s Bible. There’s nothing groundbreaking here, just a seemingly endless supply of monstrous, evil-sounding riffs. It sounds like front woman Grace Perry’s throat is bleeding with every screech she makes. There’s some sick fucking drumming on here, too. And the production is raw as fuck. I bet this band’s shows are fucking crazy places. I can’t wait to see them live.
  2. MISERY INDEX, TRAITORS (RELAPSE): If you wanna know what modern American death metal would sound like in 2008 if had never incorporated a single element of the “core” scene, this is the album for you. Misery Index don’t sound like they’re doing the same old shit Obituary and Deicide have already been doing for two decades, but there’s nothing trendy about them. Furious music to murder by, chock of full of tasty riffs and excellent musicianship – that’s what Traitors is all about. If I ever get to fulfill my life long dream of getting to stomp off to war atop an elephant, this is the kind of music I’m going to want to announce to my would-be victims the arrival of their doom. And, oh yeah, it’s political, instead of just using the same old “Fuck Her with a Knife”-style gore lyrics.
  3. BLOODBATH, THE FATHOMLESS MASTERY (PEACEVILLE): Alright, so earlier this year, I felt a little let down by Bloodbath’s EP, Unblessing the Purity. It wasn’t a bad album, it just seemed like when guitarist Dan Swano split, he took some of his mojo with him. But The Fathomless Mastery would seem to say, “Fuck Dan Swano and everyone who misses him.” This ain’t your Opeth’s Mikael Akerfedlt. Nothing pretty here; just ugliness, ugly fucking ugliness as far as the eye can see. This album is so fucking HUGE, so fucking angry, so fucking fucking fucking, it just lays everything in its path to waste. FUCK, it just makes me wanna do really fucked up torture porn shit. I wanna slam a screwdriver into the side of someone’s skull right fucking now. I know that can’t really be good for the poor souls who actually have to deal with me on a day to day basis, but it sure does make me happy as fuck.

Fuck. Making my year end list just got that much harder.

All three albums:

(four out of five horns)


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