Van Halen’s Tour Rider Proves That DLR and EVH Are Doin’ It for the Art


Only, not really.

Lest there was any doubt that Diamond Dave and the Super Van Halen Bros. kissed and made up for the love of the Benjamins, the 2008 tour rider unearthed by The Smoking Gun proves otherwise.

Most of the crap required by the band is pretty typical to the riders I’ve seen in the past – certain types of food and drinks, air conditioners and heaters, etc., and, in this case, an “education room” for Fatty Ding Dongs Van Halen and his tutor – but the really interesting aspect is the band’s requirement for each musician to receive his own dressing room. Actually, that in and of itself isn’t that fascinating – but the fact that David Lee Roth’s dressing room is specifically required to be “AS FAR AWAY FROM [the] DRESSING ROOMS” of the Van Halen family as possible does seem pretty telling (And, for the record, the all-caps demand for space comes from the rider itself, which is otherwise written in perfectly normal type.).

So, there ya have it. DLR and the Van Halens can’t even be near one another while in completely separate rooms. Which raises the question: how the fuck does this band travel from show to show? Do they need to take separate flights? I always liked to believe that David Lee Roth was just shot out of a cannon from one city to the next anyway, but now you really gotta wonder.


Metal Sucks Greatest Hits