What the...??


  • Axl Rosenberg


We all know that 99.9% of all Juggalos are idiots (I know one cool one), but are they dangerous? When I think of bad-asses who wear spooky clown make-up, a lot of names come to mind – John Wayne Gacy, The Joker, Tim Curry in It – but Juggalos ain’t any of them.

Well, it looks like certain police officials here in the States disagree with me. Thus spake Noisecreep:

Following the murder last week of a Hazleton, Pa. man by four devotees of rap metal duo Insane Clown Posse, authorities in neighboring Monroe County have classified fans of the band as a gang. The Allentown Morning Call reports that Monroe County joins police in Arizona and Utah as recognizing devotees of the group, or Juggalos as they’re referred to, as gang members. The band themselves are labeled a security threat in Wisconsin.

A security threat? Seriously? The only security I see this “band” threatening is the security of knowing I won’t have to hear any shitty music. And I have to hear shitty music pretty much every time I go into any business. Because somewhere along the way, some rocket scientist decided that a) music should be playing in all stores at all times, and b) Celine Dion and muzak is “inoffensive,” and thus should be the music played in these businesses.

But I’m getting off-topic.

So. Juggalos as a gang. Yeah, I just don’t buy it. Sorry. But I’ve never lived in the Boonies, so maybe I’m way off-base here. Maybe growing up in NYC made me too-afraid of muggers and kidnappers and rapists and mobsters and corrupt cops and serial killers and dudes on the LIRR with guns and hate crimes and planes flying into buildings and, y’know, actual threats to really fear the mighty Juggalo.

So those of you who live in Juggalo Country: am I taking this too lightly? Does the ICP fan base deserve a spot next to the Bloods and Crips? Or am I correct in assuming that they’re about as threatening as your average tax accountant?


Show Comments
Metal Sucks Greatest Hits