Green Eggs and Slam

HOT TOPIC HAUL

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It used to be that if you wanted to know what you should buy, you would see what famous people liked, and buy whatever they said was cool — like how I originally got into Suicide Silence after I heard Demi Lovato talking about them. But now there is another way to find out what you should buy: shopping haul videos. A haul video is where someone goes shopping, then makes a YouTube video where they tell you about all the stuff that they bought. Usually they are really long, and made by young girls who like to talk about themselves. I don’t have a video camera, so I can’t make a video, but I thought it might be cool for you to see some of the stuff I bought at Hot Topic the other day in case you are thinking about doing any shopping and and wondering what is cool right now.

HOT TOPIC HAUL

I like Job For A Cowboy because they’re not really metal, but their logo kind of looks they are — kind of cool how they are so good at copying the look of a metal band

HOT TOPIC HAUL

Not really sure who Egg Nog are, but I think my uncle likes them so I got this for his birthday

HOT TOPIC HAUL

This was a really good deal because it’s almost like getting a Stone Sour shirt and an Affliction shirt at the same time

I was hoping to get some ideas from this “BACK TO SCHOOL WITH HOT TOPIC VIDEO,” but it wasn’t very helpful- just looks like a bunch of losers hanging out by the train tracks near the Burbank airport :(

HOT TOPIC HAULSometimes I will wear a shirt with an urban artist on it just to stand out from all my friends who mostly listen to rock — just a small way of showing that I have my own identity and that I don’t want to be labeled by society

HOT TOPIC HAUL

This is from some old movie called Gooneys, it looks like it’s pretty funny

HOT TOPIC HAUL

My girlfriend loves Halloween because she can dress really slutty. I got her this sexy cat costume because I thought it would put her in the mood for knockin boots

HOT TOPIC HAUL

As soon as I turn 18 I want to get all tatted up — this could be a cool design, only instead of “Nickelback” mine would have my last name in old english

HOT TOPIC HAUL

How come all of those bands who sound like pop punk with breakdowns have stupid cartoons on their shirts? I think it would be cooler if they had some kind of controversial slogan or whatever in really big letters.

HOT TOPIC HAUL

I’m not really into The Nightmare Before Christmas, but a lot of the fat girls in my class are. I guess it helps them imagine that there is a world where you can be accepted no more how weird/unattractive/annoying you are.

HOT TOPIC HAUL

Their Hellyeah shirts come in 4XL. I bet they will sell a lot of them.

HOT TOPIC HAULI don’t even know what this is supposed to be a picture of — it just looks like a bunch of triangles and lines to me. Not sure why anybody would pay money for this when you could probably make it yourself in like 5 minutes.

What have you bought at Hot Topic? Do you get mad at Hot Topic because they don’t have any “real metal” shirts there and you’re like “YO I HATE YOU FOR SELLING OUT MY CULTURE!!!”?? Have you ever been to that store TORRID that is Hot Topic for fat people? Did you get made fun of for wearing metal shirts in high school???

-Sergeant D.

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