Hair Metal Happy Hour

BRET MICHAELS AND NIKKI SIXX COME TOGETHER TO CURE INSOMNIA

40

You’d think with all the shit talking and back tracking Nikki Sixx has been doing about this whole Motley Crue/Poison tour, putting him in a room with Bret Michaels to do some terrible morning television (because Motley Crue and Poison fans are now so old that the media outlet they are most likely to get their rock news from is a morning show) would an awful idea. And by “awful,” I mean for those poor bastards. You’d think it would be a great idea for us drama enthusiasts.

But no. Sixx and Michaels have been making the morning show rounds, and not only do they appear to be getting along, but they are about as exciting a comedy team as Death and Taxes. I mean, holy shit, are these interviews boring. The only thing even remotely interesting about them is the fact that Michaels is now more media-savvy than Sixx. Sixx’s exploits with Kat Von D. have kept him in the tabloids, but Rock of Love, Celebrity Apprentice, the Tony AwardsMiley Cyrus, and a giant middle finger to the desires of The Almighty have made Michaels famous in a much bigger way — a “Sheesh even my grandmother knows who Bret Michaels is” kinda way — and he’s gotten good at giving these very bland talk show interviews.

ANYWAY, if you do wanna watch these, here’s the video I prefer, if for no other reason than because I thought the lady was saying “Yep, that’s my sexual future” at the beginning, and I was like, “Whuh-huh?” (she’s actually saying “my six year old’s future”). But Metal Insider, who first brought these interviews to my attention, have another one, too.

-AR

Metal Sucks Greatest Hits