ADRENALINE MOB: MIKE PORTNOY’S IFFY NEW BAND
When I heard about the Dream Theater-shaped hole in the life of drummer Mike Portnoy back in September, I wanted to pitch him on my long-gestating idea to form a killer Jellyfish cover band. I bet he’d be into it cuz of his Jellyfish super-fandom (he has cited 1993’s Spilt Milk as a top ten favorite album); and he’s a pro at pulling together all-star jams, like his awesomely fun tributes to The Who, The Beatles, and Led Zeppelin with guys like Paul Gilbert, Jason McMaster, and Dave LaRue; and lastly, The Ghosts At Number One (that’s my vote for our band name) could serve as a totally non-cynical tribute to another hardcore Jellyfish fan, the late Dimebag Darrell Abbott. And what better way to hip headbangers to irresistible non-metal jams? How could Mike say no to that? Can I call him Mike?
But, shit, while I was dicking around, gobbling drugs, and failing to corner, pressure, and/or threaten Portnoy about the Jellyfish idea, he teamed with qualified musicians he knows who actually, like, realize their ideas. Even if those ideas aren’t so great. Symphony X singer Russell Allen talks about Adrenaline Mob, one of Portnoy’s new bands:
[Adrenaline Mob is] a straight-up rock band with just rock songs — kind of like an edgy, modern kind of sound… almost like Rob Zombie meets Black Label Society meets Disturbed, with Dio singing. So it’s definitely different and it’s cool.
Different? Sure. Cool? Uh, dude, I don’t know. It seems like good marketing to name-drop three popular bands and the most respected man in metal, but, no offense, is that description appealing to anyone over the age of fifteen? When old guys aim for “edgy” and “modern,” it sets off alarm bells, right?
And it all might be a waste of Portnoy-level skills, though it’s equally possible that he’s just the dude to pump life into those three moribund styles. Ditto for Ad-Mob guitarist Rich Ward of Fozzy, aka the dude who teamed with producer Devin Townsend for the only rap-rock record I’ve ever rubbed my ballz on, Pigwalk by Stuck Mojo. Could go either way, really. Hey if it doesn’t work out, I have just the project for Portnoy!
-ADF
