WIN A CHANCE TO LET THE OSBOURNES SHOVE A CAMERA UP YOUR ASS
It will be romantic, they swear.
“Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne, along with ‘The Late Show With David Letterman’ announcer Alan Kalter, have teamed up with CBS and NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital to create the CBS Cares Colonoscopy Sweepstakes. One lucky person will win a colonoscopy, along with a trip to New York City, including airfare, hotel and $500 spending cash.”
I know that colonoscopies are a really important aspect of modern healthcare and I don’t mean to make light of something so serious, but… I mean, come ON. This HAS to be the weirdest contest in the history of ever, right? Like, can you imagine winning this contest and being on the plane, and making friendly chit-chat with the person in the seat next to you?
“So what brings you to New York?”
“Oh, I won a free trip and colonoscopy.”
“Y’know. From Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne.”
If a MetalSucks winner happens to win this contest, please, please, PLEASE let us know. We’re located in New York, and might even be willing to chip in for a bonus gynecological exam, too.