Everyone's Replaceable

BREAKING: Tom Araya to Sit Out Slayer’s Summer Tour, Leaving Kerry King as Sole Original Member; Jason Newsted Announced as Temporary Replacement

  • Axl Rosenberg

Slayer Quotes

Well ain’t this a kick in the nards?

Tom Araya will not be able to particpate in Slayer’s previously-announced summer tour dates in Europe, because he needs to undergo further surgery for the back problems that have plagued him since at least 2010. With Dave Lombardo still on the sidelines due to a financial dispute and Jeff Hanneman still on the sidelines due to a near-fatal spider bite, you would think that cancelling the trek would be a no-brainer, since any version of Slayer that played the shows would feature just one original member — namely, guitarist Kerry King.

But no! King isn’t gonna allow a little hiccup like having no band to stop him from touring! The band will proceed with their summer tour… with Jason Newsted filling-in for Araya on bass and vocals, while Gary Holt continues to fill-in for Hanneman, and Jon Dette continues to occupy Dave Lombardo’s seat behind the drum kit.

What… the… fucking… fuck???????

Says King via a press release:

“It started to become apparent when we were in Australia in February that Tom’s back was acting up again. He went to see the doctor the moment we returned to the U.S. and, sure enough, he needs more back surgery. Neither of us wanted to see the European shows be just totally scrapped. Can you imagine how shitty that would have been?So I did what I thought was best, and called up Newsted. He was game for it, and here we are. I think we’re gonna deliver something really special for the fans all summer long.”

Newsted added:

“I’m honored to play with one of the finest metal bands in history! Look out Europe, Slayer and Jason Newsted are coming to kick yer ass!!!”

As a result, all of Newsted’s upcoming tour dates have been postponed until further notice, to the disappointment, I’m sure, of tens of people.

Okay so here’s the thing about this: a band with Jason Newsted, Kerry King, Gary Holt, and Jon Dette actually MIGHT be good. I mean, they’d have to let Holt write most, if not all, of the music — I’m just saying, I wouldn’t necessarily dismiss such a band right from the get-go.

But they shouldn’t be calling it “Slayer.” Because it’s not Slayer. It’s Kerry King pulling an Axl Rose. I suspect if King tried to tour this band under a different name, he’d have to give up the sure-to-be terrific guarantees Slayer gets, and he ain’t about to do that. And thus, this summer, fans across Europe will be seeing “Slayer” instead of Slayer or a new band.

This is just… I don’t even know what to say. It’s fucking ridiculous is what it is. I guess if there’s a silver lining, it’s that King didn’t hire David Draiman?

You can get all upcoming “Slayer” tour dates here.

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