The Inessentials: Stream Halestorm’s New Covers EP

It seems inevitable that a Pat Benetar song appears on Halestorm’s new covers EP. I mean, if you have half an ear, you can hear that singer Lzzy Hale is a laboratory-spawned non-artist whose boring vocals could’ve been fitted to alt-rock, country, or pop. But her vanilla ilk gets trampled among the big-money herd, so Hale and her management find their best shot in heavy rock where she might garner a few second looks. Too bad even horny metal bros go comatose before managing a third look at a flattened out Benetar sweatily coloring by numbers.

So let’s all turn away until Hale gets real, pomps her hair up, and launches her second act as a DJ/diva/troubadour of some kind; alternately, we might kinda like her band’s flavorless-rock-by-hired-guns vibe (like we might like In This Moment, Evanescence, or Drill). That’s fine too. If the latter, you go listen to Halestorm’s second covers EP, OnE SoNg For EaCh TyPe Of RocK RadIo StaTiOn here.