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All That Remains’ Phil Labonte: “The Only People that Have a Legit Grievance when it Comes to Any Racial Slurs is the Black Community”

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phil labonte loves cockOkay okay okay, I promise this is the last time I write about Phil Labonte for a good, long while. It’s just that his latest bout of verbal diarrhea is SO wet and brown that it just demanded something be said.

Okay, ready? Here are the Hershey squirts, from an upcoming issue of Revolver (by way of The PRP):

“In 2005, on the Sounds Of The Underground DVD I said, ‘PC is for faggots.’ That was the first time people went, ‘Whoa, what did he say?’ I have nothing against gay people. It’s just a word. Honestly, I think the only people that have a legit grievance when it comes to any racial slurs is the black community. I know the homosexual community has problems with it and I understand their hurt feelings.

“But homosexuals were never property. They’ve had a rough time and I’m not trying to minimize that, but I think the black community has a whole lot more room to be upset about a word than the LGBT community. It’s one thing to say, ‘This guy said something and it hurt my feelings and it bummed me out and it sucks.’ Okay, that’s a good perspective. But I don’t know that you need a whole social movement.

“When it comes to the shit that black people have gone through I think it’s okay to be like, ‘Well you know, that was seriously fucked up.’ We need to do something about this.”

Ignoring the fact that, as Metal Injection has pointed out, “faggot” isn’t a racial slur, this is still one of the most ignorant things I’ve ever heard anyone say. Not that the world needs a pissing contest over which race, religion, or nationality has suffered the most, but…

I would love to see Phil go tell some Chinese people whose ancestors built the United States railroads under horrible conditions that they shouldn’t be offended by the use of the word “chink.” Then he can go find a nice, middle-aged Japanese couple whose parents were interred during World War II despite being American citizens and tell them that the phrase “slant” is really not such a big deal.

Then he can go to a Native American reservation and tell those people to shut the hell about the Redskins already, before reminding them that if they’d just been smart enough to have a flag, the Europeans would never have stolen their land, so they really have no one to blame but themselves.

(Yes I know that clip is about Indians, not Native Americans, but the point stands.)

He can also take some time out of his busy schedule to throw rocks at Irish and Italian Americans while calling them “dumb micks” and “stupid wops,” so they can relive the laugh riot that was being an immigrant in the 19th century. Then he can tell some Mexicans and Cubans that the famous declaration on the Statue of Liberty — “Give me your tired, your poor/Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free” — doesn’t apply them, so they can relive the laugh riot that was is being an immigrant in the 21st century.

After that, he can fly to Israel and tell my cousin who was born in a displaced persons camp that he ought not to be so touchy about the word “kike,” and that he shouldn’t fret about the recent rise of anti-semitism in Europe, either. And while he’s in the Middle East, he might as well stop to call any man wearing a turban a “towel head” and see how that goes.

And assuming he’s survived that encounter, he can fly back to the U.S. and visit the home of Judy and Dennis Shepard, whose gay, teenage son, Matthew, was beaten, tortured, tied to a fence and left to die in 1998. I’m sure they’d be thrilled to hear what the modern day Martin Luther King has to say about gay rights.

Then Phil can come back to good ol’ New York City, walk up to some random women on the street, and tell those bitches to stop being so sensitive about rape and get back in the kitchen where they belong.

I will then personally pick Phil up and give him a ride over to the very public and seemingly very safe spot in Greenwich Village where a gay man was shot and killed by some homophobic asswipe in the summer of 2013, before taking a stroll to the nearby Stonewall Inn, where the oh-so-sensitive homosexuals, I assure you, do not take the word “faggot” lightly. I’ll do my best to make sure that none of those gay men and women are also African-American, though, because I wouldn’t want him to be confused as to why twenty or thirty men and women and a Liza Manelli impersonator are now all eyeing him the way a lion eyes a gazelle just before it pounces.

No joke: Labonte’s comments are SO INCREDIBLY STUPID that there are only two logical explanations as to how the words could leave his mouth without his brain going, “Uh, what?”:

  1. The public school system has failed once again, and Phil has absolutely no knowledge whatsoever of history. In this instance, I guess, he overheard someone talking about slavery once, or maybe saw 12 Years a Slave on a flight while on tour or something, which explains why he knows about the plight of African-Americans despite having no idea that plenty of other races, religions, and nationalities have also suffered an unbearable amount of persecution.
  2. He is going to incredible lengths to hide his love of cock and has a very deep fear that people will figure out he’s a total closet case if he ever stops using gay slurs.

Either way, fuck this moron.

All That Remains have a new album out next month. I’ve heard it. Even if Labonte were president of his local MENSA chapter, it would still be a fucking embarrassment to sound. Review coming soon!

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