Mushroomhead Defend Their Use of the Confederate Flag, May Be Even Dumber Than We Thought

Despite the fact that a) it is a sad sybol of a bygone era and b) they’re from Ohio, which was part of the Union during the Civil War, Mushroomhead have decided to prominently feature the Confederate flag on their t-shirts. The band has now attempted to justify this moronic decision via a Facebook post which is about as intelligent as the anatomical feature to which their name refers.

Here’s a screen cap of that post (it also includes the image at the top of this article), in the event the band decides to pretend it never happened:Well, it’s good to know that the dudes in Mushroomhead will have jobs waiting for them writing copy for Levi’s commercials when the band finally goes under.

Now let’s dissect this pathetic attempt to imbue a racist symbol with profound meaning line by line, shall we?

“A rebel is a person who stands up for their own personal opinions despite what anyone else says.”

Okay. Despite what you say, many of us are going to continue to stand up for our own personal opinion that waving the Confederate flag around is like waving a Nazi flag around. I suspect you, in turn, will continue to stand up for your opinion that we are wrong. So are we all rebels? Or does your fortune cookie wisdom fall apart the moment one thinks about it for even a passing second?

“A true rebel stands up for what they believe is right, not against what’s right.”

Okay. Some of us are standing up for human rights. You’re standing up for a racist emblem of our country’s most deplorable chapter. But, sure, you’re standing up for what’s right and we’re standing against what’s right. Whatever you say fellas.

“It’s not about smoking crack, drinking till you’re rendered unconsious, or beating the crap out of anyone that crosses your path.”

Holy shit, your fans are either knuckle dragging animals, or you believe them to be knuckle dragging animals. Is crack smoking a commonplace hobby in the Mushroomhead fan community? It would explain how anyone tolerates your shitty music, that’s for sure.

“It’s all about being an individual and refusing to follow a crowd that forces you to think the same way they do even if it means becoming an outcast to society.”

It is at this point that it may occur to the reader that this entire argument is based on the assumption that the word “rebel” has positive connotations. This is an understandable error, but an error nonetheless — the word has neither automatic positive nor negative connotations. The dictionary definition of “rebel” is as follows:

noun
1. a person who refuses allegiance to, resists, or rises in arms against the government or ruler of his or her country.
2. a person who resists any authority, control, or tradition.

So, yes, technically, I guess, Mushroomhead are describing a rebel. But that doesn’t negate the fact that they’re arguing in favor of bigotry and bigoted symbolism. Being a rebel does not mean being ignorant, even if being ignorant makes you “an outcast to society.”

They’re also doing that Conservative thing where they posit that anyone who argues against them is arguing against freedom of speech. The fact that the paradox of this assertion is always completely lost on the people making it never ceases to astound me. “We can say whatever we want, but if you say whatever you want, that’s impeding our freedom of speech!”

But the thing is — we can ALL say WHATEVER we want! That’s what freedom of speech means. No one is denying your right to use the Confederate flag if it’s really so important to you — we’re just saying that if you do use the Confederate flag, we are going to assume that you are horrible people, and, oh hey, freedom of speech allows us to say as much. If you’re a rebel who values being an outcast from blah blah blah, this really ought not to bother you so much.

“True rebels know who they are and do not compromise their individuality or personal opinion for anyone.”

People need cut it right the fuck out with this assertion that the Confederate flag is a symbol of individuality. When literally millions of people utilize something for ideological and/or fashion purposes, it no longer represents being unique.

“They’re straightforward and honest and they will sure as hell tell it like it is.”

“Tell it like it is” is another one of those phrases which sounds good but is actually pretty dumb, because “like it is” suggests objectivity regarding topics which are almost purely subjective. You can “tell it like it is” with regards to, say, color — red is red and blue is blue no matter what — but you can’t “tell it like it is” with regards to which color is superior, because that’s a matter of opinion. You thinking the Confederate flag is some mighty symbol of rebellion is your opinion; my opinion is that it’s a symbol of hatred and cruelty.

Oh, wow, look. I was straightforward and honest with you and I “told it like it is.” I’m such a rebel!