Rumor: Tim Lambesis Re-Launching As I Lay Dying with All New Members

It is truly remarkable how fast you can turn your life around after trying to hire someone to murder the mother of your children. Not only is Tim Lambesis out of jail already, but he’s getting re-married and, earlier this summer, teased activity — literally — on As I Lay Dying’s social network accounts, suggesting he might try to re-launch some form of the band.

Which, “a source familiar with the situation” tells Rock Feed, is exactly what Lambesis is planning to do:

“We’re told that the previous members of the band will not be involved in the proposed As I Lay Dying revival, and instead, new members will be in place at the time of a return. The identities of those members are not known, but we’re told that the band has new material in the works.”

Not shocking news given the previous tease. And yet, somehow, still repulsive. You have to wonder how desperate for any version of “success” a musician would have to be to agree to join the new As I Lay Dying. The AILD brand may not have been broken when Lambesis was first arrested, but his oddly unrepentant attitude about his crime nailed that coffin shut. At best, he is now a punchline. At best.

Speaking of punchlines: remember how Lambesis was suing a prison medical team for $35 million on account of them allegedly being responsible for his growing moobs while he was in the clink? Remember what Lambesis said when he filed that suit?

“As I am a stage performer by profession, much of my act is based upon the visual stimulus of audience perception — i.e., as a front man of leading rockstardom, my continued success is contingent upon my projecting a favorable physical image, Now, with the advent of these unsightly breasts, my music career shall undoubtedly suffer monetarily.”

So I guess he was either able to get rids of his sweater puppies, or otherwise decided to keep them as a possible scapegoat should the AILD re-launch crash and burn (please, Dio who art in Heaven, let it crash and burn)? Really, to me, this is the most interesting thing about a potential Lambesis comeback: finding out what happened with his bitch tits.