Someone Maxed Out Ozzy’s Credit Card

  • Axl Rosenberg

Stars — they’re just like us! Their hair goes gray — just like us! They hurt themselves when they get up to pee in the middle of the night — just like us! And they’re the victims of credit card fraud — just like us!

Yes, it’s true: someone went off the rails on Ozzy’s credit train. This according to Sharon Osbourne, who shared the story on Tuesday’s (October 27) episode of The Talk. She also revealed that her card was maxed out as well:

“It’s my [daughter] Kelly’s birthday today. I went out last night to pick up her gift. I give my credit card, and they come back and they say, ‘Do you have another credit card? It didn’t go through.’ And I say, ‘Well, just try it again, put it through again.’ It still didn’t go through. ‘Do you have another one?’ I said, ‘Yes, of course I do.’ I hand them Ozzy’s. And then they come back and they go, ‘Do you have another one? It didn’t go through.’ I’m, like, ‘What’s going on?’”

She continued:

“Someone rang up charges and maxed out Ozzy’s card and my card. I called through to the credit card company, and they go, ‘No, no, no. You’re maxed out. So is Ozzy, on this account.’ I’m like, ‘I don’t go to that store, or to that store.’”

First of all, since I know you’re all SUPER worried about it: Sharon was able to get Kelly a birthday present in time. So. PHEW!

Second of all, this makes me wonder, for the first time in my life, if the name on Ozzy Osbourne’s credit card is Ozzy Osbourne or John Osbourne (his real name). If it’s Ozzy, I assume that either all of these purchases were made online, or all of these purchases were made by a very good Ozzy Osbourne impersonator, or all of these purchases were made a store in Bumfuck run by an senior citizen who doesn’t know who Ozzy Osbourne is.

Third of all, the reason this made me wonder, for the first time in my life, what name is on Ozzy Osbourne’s credit card is because I have never before imagined Ozzy Osbourne has a credit card. With all due respect, Ozzy frequently only kinda-sorta seems to know where he is, and besides, he’s been rich and famous for approximately fifty years. I’ve always assumed Sharon forbids him from ever carrying cash, credit cards, or keys.

Thanks for tuning in to another fun edition of Axl Rosenberg Overthinks Wholly Irrelevant Shit.

You can watch Sharon tell the story herself below.


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