Enlarge

Please Stop: Tommy Lee Posts His Old Man Balls Again

0

It’s been six months since he last flashed the world on his Twitter page, so I guess the world was due for yet another unsolicited look at Mötley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee‘s 60 year-old junk. Let that sink in — the dude’s 60 years old and he can’t stop himself from sharing a photo of his old, saggy balls on the internet.

I’m not willing to spend too much time on this post, because forced nudes from an elderly man at this point are apparently the new norm now, but he also found the worst, least flattering way you’d want to share a photo of your aging sack. The dude had to have forced someone else to take the photo for him, since it’s from behind and down low, so you get some ass cheeks in the shot as well.

Tommy — no one wants to see that. Jesus fucking Christ, man. And whatever happened to your OnlyFans? Why give this shit away for free when you should apparently be making $40 a month from each of your subscribers. If I was enough of a sucker to drop that much cash to see an aging rock star’s nudes, I’d be a little salty that the whole world got to peep them pendulous clackers for free.

Oh and I didn’t even talk about the apparent “joke” attached to this photo. He directed the tweet at Planters — you know, the company whose mascot is Mr. Peanut and sells nuts to the world. Get it? Testicles. Nuts. Har har fucking har.

If you really want to see the photo in question, it’s still up on his account. Who knows how long it’ll be around before Elon Musk acts, so get your looks in before it comes down. Though knowing Musk and his apparent boner for free speech as long as you don’t make fun of him, we might get Tommy Lee’s balls on Twitter in perpetuity. And that’s the sort of apocalyptic hellscape we all deserve, really.

Show Comments
Metal Sucks Greatest Hits