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White Collar Criminals

THE [VIRTUAL] REALITY OF MAJOR LABEL A&R

 Thursday, February 18th, 2010 at 4:00pm by

Most of you probably don’t know that I used to work at Atlantic Records. Not back in the heyday of Atlantic metal but during the lifetime of this here metal blog, in fact. Any time I brought up some of the classic metal acts to grace the ranks of Atlantic’s roster — Testament, Skid Row, Saigon Kick, King’s X… P.O.D. [I KID!!] — I was met with blank stares by the label’s higher-ups. They’d rather bob their heads in forced unison to the brand new sappy crappy Staind single that sounds exactly like all the other sappy crappy Staind singles. Oh, the stories I have about those board meetings… for another day.

Don’t worry; I got out of dodge as soon as I could. All is good now that I work safely in the confines of the MS Mansion in pantsless bliss.

I didn’t work in the A&R department at Atlantic, but I sat in on enough meetings and watched enough happen to know that the reality of major label A&R men suggested in this spoof video is frighteningly accurate. Enjoy; and if you’re a budding musician with major label dreams, be frightened. Very frightened.

-VN

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  • http://schenkeltown.blogspot.com SchenkelTown

    i worked for a prominent new york record label for two years, and that video is (unfortunately) very accurate. i especially liked the part about a&r guys living in queens.

    • jibbler

      American arrogance is a myth?

      Queens??? Queen’s Park maybe. Have a listen again. And the “Salisbury pub” (think they made a typo when making the movie cos they pronounce it “Sails Bury”) and “selling out the Shepherd’s Bush Empire” comments not to mention the, albeit pretty poor electronic, English accent didn’t give you any clues?

      • Insomnivore

        I’ve used the programme before and you need to get phonetic on it’s ass sometimes, Salisbury would have to be Sauls Berry or Sauls Bree depending on accent. Christ that was nerdy. Anyway, bonus internet points for fighting cultural imperialism.

  • Double D

    Dude, now you have to post a blog about your A&R days.

    • hikizume

      1

      • http://myspace.com/northwestroyale Blake

        2

        • Anselmowitz

          3

          • fuzzyshan

            4

  • Alex_P

    Another reason why major labels just need to fucking die at the hands of innovative minor and semi-minor labels.

    Here’s two great labels: Pelagic Records and Denovali records. Pelagic is owned by members of the Ocean, and mostly functions to facilitate their own releases. They also sign bands which they personally lie: so far they’ve got the Swiss instrumetalists Nebra, and they’ve re-released God is an Astronaut’s All is Violent… on vinyl. Their focus is more or less on packaging releases properly, to entice you to buy the album, and to maintain quality control over what gets released rather than flooding the market. Denovali from France are the record label who distribute Celeste releases, and they also focus on packaging (which seems to be a very European phenomenon). They also give out free downloads (at least for Celeste) legally as Win-zip files, which basically increases the audience for their releases.

    Another good strategy is Relapse, who let you stream full albums. They will survive. Companies like Atlantic? They’ll be cut down.

    • Alex_P

      Note that I doubt the majors will fully disappear, despite my wishes. There are always people who feel Coldplay deserve to make as much from album sales as Revocation. Still, my basic argument is that traditional strategies don’t work like they did in the 90s.

    • http://www.metalinsider.net Dan Metal Insider

      You guys realize that while some major labels can act really sleazy, indie labels can be just as (if not moreso) sleazy, right?

      • Natsquatch

        It’s true, just look at Victory and Trustkill.

  • Facebook User

    I’m very interested in hearing these stories.

  • toddski

    lol fucking hilarious.

  • Goolash

    I have heard a few stories about Victory having there bands on tour like 250-300 days a year. That doesnt sound that enticing to me to want to be signed by them. basically, you do the work and the name of the label behind you and thats it

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-Lekberg/779008102 Jason Lekberg

    Lets start a list of industries that everyone who doesn’t work in thinks they are an expert at. I’ll start:
    1) Music

    For the record though, that video is frighteningly close to how it can be.

  • brandonmetal

    ‘you do all the work and initial investment, and we will gladly take the profits’
    wow, what a good deal!

  • Thenightlighter

    Yeah….thats on point. I was signed to a major label for 7 years, now i produce and manage…and essentially do everything an a&r is supposed to do…but better….lol

    but thats so seriously on point all the way down to everytime i left the office i was told to raid the cd draws and take every album i wanted…..that ended up being 1/2 my pay after 7 yrs.