PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST: WIN A VALIENT THORR STRANGER VINYL AND T-SHIRT

Thursday, September 23rd, 2010 at 5:00pm by

Last week we offered up four limited edition colored vinyls of 36 Crazyfists’ latest Collisions & Castaways. I gotta say, the entries were pretty weak, both in number and quality, but we had to chose four winners anyway so here they are:

  • chainchomp: “No really dude, you have a neon caterpillar on your junk! No homo.”
  • Robb: “Harold and Kumar go to White Chapel.”
  • Sacajawea: “As they stumbled out of the venue going on and on about how great the concert was, the opening band prepared to do their first song of the night.”
  • Fish: “Just a little further Frodo.  You must destroy the ring.”

This week we’re offering one lucky winner a vinyl copy of Valient Thorr’s latest banger Stranger (reviewed by our own Urbandale Grimes) along with a VT t-shirt. Be sure to read my fascinating interview with Valient Himself and check them out on tour in the U.S. right this very moment. To win, just come up with the funniest caption to the below photo, and remember to use a real email address (or post it with your comment if you’re using FB Connect)!


  • aj lucas

    its called crowd surfing you stupid bitch

    • aj lucas

      well youve heard it girls why you never date a man like tommy vext, he doesnt know what he wants, screaming at you, then singing, then throwing stuff, punching and roid rage. the guys fucked for life and you will be too, that is if you like SBC(side effects of steroids)

    • YUKKIMEY

      hey nice to mt y

    • http://www.capssupplier.com MonsterEnergycap

      http://www.capssupplier.com

      Sharing with us!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mike-Taco-Bozzacco/678620036 Mike Taco Bozzacco

      Way number 138 to abort the little guy growing in her bastard tube

    • CRAZYD

      Lol!
      You mean ” Wrong place to surf”

    • Dave Sorensen

      Uh honey …. Um the bartender said you’re cut off .

  • doom

    do you still like brutal slamz?

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nick-Briggs/1133730038 Nick Briggs

      win

    • http://www.heavyblogisheavy.com/ Alkahest

      Looks more like bridal slams to me.

  • Genial Gentile

    Hammered Smash Face

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Roger-Prindle/518661975 Roger Prindle

      This is so full of win ^^^

    • Bayon3twork

      “Slam-her” Smashed Face

  • Dropped on my head as a child

    Touchdown

    • Bayon3twork

      As I Lay Dying

      • Krowte Noyab

        NoChildren MyBride

  • http://deathmetalbaboon.com/ byrd36

    When leap-frog goes wrong

  • DK0

    His interest piqued by the article in which Hockey was named the most metal sport in existence, Bob attempts to use a hip-check in every day life.

  • Dirtman73

    Protestants and Bad Brains just don’t mix.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Rodney-Wilder-Jr/42003558 Rodney Wilder Jr.

    “Five Finger Face Plant”

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Rodney-Wilder-Jr/42003558 Rodney Wilder Jr.
      • Dude…

        1

    • Tryfon

      + 1

  • Timbodini

    Wedder Slam

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/JT-OBrien/568906438 JT OBrien
  • Kuranes

    Following the release of “Breakdancing Bridesmaid” Meg Ryan slipped into obscurity.

  • Brock Sterns

    As the wedding drew to a merry ending, the bride softly– ehh fuck it,
    GROUNDCORE SLAMCORE FLOORCORE

  • justinmorse

    Kama Sutra in all of its metal glory.

    youareyouronlyhelp@live.com

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alejandro-Aldana/683878171 Alejandro Aldana

    Anvil’s newest fan base post Anvil: The Story of Anvil

    VerrucktsAl@aol.com

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dre-Toledo/628955415 Dre Toledo

    “The Faceless”

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dre-Toledo/628955415 Dre Toledo
    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Neil-Forrest-Nalley/1396964302 Neil Forrest Nalley

      win

      • Bayon3twork

        “Slam-her” Smashed Face

        • Bayon3twork

          sorry, replied to the wrong comment

  • wha?

    Dancefloor Smashed Face

  • http://Gnartallica.wordpress.com Ross Gnarly

    Cameron Diaz at Elijah Allman’s birthday.

  • http://www.heavyblogisheavy.com/ Alkahest

    That isn’t what I meant when I said we needed to have a throwdown.

  • Sacajawea

    This is why they only do a reception after the wedding, not after the divorce.

  • chainchomp

    After a full night of pretending he gave a shit about the bridesmaid’s past and future, having to participate in the Chicken Dance, and listening to every shit eating love song imaginable, Blaine had no idea how fast the roofie would actually take effect.

    • Metal Fuckin’ Dave

      Oh man I laughed.

  • TonyT

    Why isn’t ths damn mop working?

  • inhumanrampager

    Headbanging:
    You’re doing it wrong.

  • Bryan P.

    This is how you break dance when you’re retarded.

  • AetherJake

    This is what happens when you listen to Valient Thorr.

    vjjones2@ncsu.edu

  • MoshUntilPanic

    this doesnt even need a caption, its hilarious.

  • Drewtastic

    A new breakdancing group: The Drunk Steady Crew

  • http://ultraliskmetal Jonathan Tennant

    Enthusiastic fans at the Fozzy show attempt to imitate Chris Jericho’s other profession.

  • Stiggs

    Dump her ass, bro; she’s not hardcore enough for you.

  • Howie

    Megadeth’s “Headcrusher” video shoot.

  • Fuckin Eh

    Alice in Pain

  • VoP

    How Kurt Cobain really died.

    • Sacajawea

      Awesome.

  • Jerry

    Methods of Mayhem presents “The Cougar Dance”

  • Astraea

    looks like Gold Cobra’s sales are gonna fall flat on its face

  • JPayne

    I Know My Dicks Big But Seriously….I Didnt Wanna Have To Degrade You In Public

  • Robert Escue

    A couple trying to impress their friends with their br00tal slam skillz based on watching their kids at crabcore shows while not taking into account the finer points of breakdowns.

    MILFCORE = Epic Fail!

  • MetalMeatHammer666

    Remember when Valient Thorr played our wedding? Didn’t think so….

  • Thestormmaster

    Let the bodies hit the floor!

  • Dingas McCloud

    VALIENT FLORR

    • DJ Deuce Grunt

      Please let this one win

      • J-Rod

        Dingas for the win

  • GKIII

    New dance move “Comatose Worm” is sweeping the nation.

  • Douchebro

    The open bar was closed after Kate Gosselin started a hate mosh.

  • MetalMeatHammer666

    Power-bomb, cobra clutch, Chocolate fountain, flying dragon, pile-driver, DDT, D.J. T, Figure Four, Hammerlock, Dinette Set, Perfect circle, Body Slam, Chopped tofu, a chop to face, a chop to neck, break dance with Beth.

  • Vasteburai

    After finally giving up on rock n roll, Courtney Love finally follows her dream to Be in the jabberwockies.

  • spot

    He regrets wishing that a hot girl would replace his left hand

    • >_>

      This guy just won.

    • The Lotus Eater

      Best comment ever!
      Win!

    • EJ666

      There you go. win.

  • Hoodrat

    hardcore dancing in heals? i think not

  • jeff

    bitch whatchu thinkin, u can’t crowd surf at weddings!

  • Vlygar

    “You OK, bro?”

    vdeogmrlr@msn.com

  • Spike

    Twister.

  • http://www.myspace.com/signorojoswe Kaffebaggel

    Shit R2D2, C3PO really can’t handle the mosh!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/RonaldReagan-GeorgeWashington/1347964651 RonaldReagan GeorgeWashington

    Face Down Ass Up That’s The Way We Like To Fuck

  • Kirk

    I told you what would happen, sweetheart, if Rob Zombie directed another film.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Cody-Graves/100000804200114 Cody Graves

    Guess she didn’t recognize that was Vince Neil walking by.
    metalhead1109@yahoo.com

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Amelia-Rupp/1269821017 Amelia Rupp

      nice one

  • misanthrowup

    dude, I told you, the Mayan calander said that at 10:00pm exactly, you need to be standing on a brown square . . . asshole

  • Matt S

    But honey! I thought you said you liked The Wedding Crashers

  • Dwarfskeet

    SLAUGHTER FACE!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Little/606193179 Mark Little

    And like that, Bobby Feldman Break Dance Bar Mitzvah was over.

  • Matthew Grant Anson

    Clearly this is what Testament meant by “Into the Pit.”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Joseph-Schafer/40902026 Joseph Schafer

    Wedding Dancing to “Jane Doe”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/TOm-Saunders/660453371 TOm Saunders

    “What have I told you about breakdancing in heels?”

    thomas20035@hotmail.com

  • Serj

    That tumor on his arm looks just like aunt Kathy!

    serjyousillyfool@gmail.com

  • basslogic

    Wedding Wormcore

  • canea

    Dawn’s early light revealed mystery bruises from the night before. And sadly, it was all for naught. Though they were delivered with enthusiasm, Tonya’s drunken interpretation of “The Worm” and Matthew’s “Elephant Walk” had failed to impress the new inlaws.

  • Jacob Neiss

    Apparently they were thinking two different things when he asked her to “go down”

  • Jason

    Susan quickly became sick of Mike’s overdone “picking up change” move, and decided to debut her own hardcore dance move at the God Forbid Gala

  • mike

    that’s why floories are better than rufies. there’s no way she’ll wake up.

  • Kael

    Surprise sex; now at a wedding near you.

  • Chuckles

    You don’t fuck around in Slayer Pits man. Seriously

  • !!!

    Don’t let the fall distract you from the obvious mankles in the top left. Incidentally, I do like Gaahl’s choice of dress.

  • http://ciarlino.blogspot.com/ Top

    “White people can dance too”

  • Mark Neville

    “nah … over here, this bit – i swear it smells like fruit tingles …”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andy-Perkovich/1533571718 Andy Perkovich

    Fed up with In this Moment, Bill finally taught Maria Brink the true meaning of a beautiful tragedy…
    AndyP4415@gmail.com

  • Shaman

    ‘Bent Backwards and Broken’ wasn’t a popular first dance choice for the newlyweds.

    shamanphair@gmail.com

  • LoomeyTunes

    Courtney Loves really gone down hill again

  • Inept Kid

    Kate Plus H8.

  • headnuts

    Video footage soon to be on jersey shore season 2

  • Evil Weevil

    Guess she didn’t recognize Vince Neil…

  • brutalbrutus

    Try that west coast two-step again, bitch. I dare you. *continues picking up the change*

  • Romaould the Loquacious

    I’m Rick James, beeyitch!

  • LeatherSnake

    Stage Diving 101:

    1-Get on STAGE.
    2-DIVE into crowd.
    3-Know what a “crowd” is.
    ***Caution-May be Dangerous if Blonde

    crowd—/kraʊd/–noun
    a large number of persons gathered closely together; throng: a crowd of VALIENT THORR FANS.

  • hexbasher

    moshing at weddings is always a bad (awesome) scene

  • TanyaRocksMe

    At least I’m not the only who punches out the Emo chick when she does windmills in the pit.

  • Hugh

    “Look at those calve muscles and the hair! I’m telling you that is totally a dude in the blue dress!”

    “There has to be a better way to do this…”

  • Jordan

    Women: Nature’s Punching Bag

  • Adam

    Taking the term breakdown too literally.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/David-Adam-Meredith/1463830541 David Adam Meredith

    pop n lock mo fo

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christian-Varg-Voltaggio/1409575074 Christian Varg Voltaggio

    Fitted Hats and Ed Hardy door prizes bring out the tuff in eveyrone.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Samuel-Wroblewski/1174376685 Samuel Wroblewski

    and thats what you fucking get for fucking blowing the best man!

  • http://Gnartallica.wordpress.com Ross Gnarly

    Fucking Courtney Love… I told that bitch not
    to throw a party next to a meth lab…

  • http://slowlyweblog.wordpress.com Cody

    Why you should stop trying to invent “Mosh moves”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Joe-Maheux/682872935 Joe Maheux

    Fist pumping and weddings don’t mix.

  • http://~ B. Ewing

    that chick sucks at dancing

    • http://~ B. Ewing

      the first comment had my old email…not that i think ill win

  • TBird

    Man: See? Behind Chuck Norris’ beard IS another fist!

  • tsniagaesir

    Ohhh, you’re supposed to catch her after you slip a rufie in her drink?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shaun-Reeves/100000774753955 Shaun Reeves

    Face Destroyer

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Truitt/1822133913 Michael Truitt

    “STOP! Hammer time!”

    OR

    “aww dude, crack kills”

    captain-truitt@live.com

  • Nooger

    Head Over Heels in facefucked. They must have played the Faceless. Guess she’s gonna need An Autopsy.

  • http://www.myspace.com/poimusic Tits n dix

    SLAM dancing

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alex-Ward/1369047987 Alex Ward

    Ozzy Osbourne Circa 1982.

  • Wildman

    Maria Brink needs dancing lessons.

  • C Frazier

    Hey!, on craigslist you said you were a BBW.

    -frazier.colin@gmail.com

  • seasonswithered

    Brides of Destruction!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Roger-Prindle/518661975 Roger Prindle

    Best wedding photographer ever.

  • B-dizzle

    It seems Sergeant D has forgot that he listens slam, not enacts it on the dance floor

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    Due to declining ticket sales, people were forced to see Limp Bizkit at Bar Mitzvhas.

    eddievanclaylen@yahoo.com

  • noah marable

    Damn it Donna.. You’re gettin’ whooped in there.
    Reach out and slap your partners hand!

    A Chop to the gut!
    A chop to the face!
    A chop to the neck!
    Whoooooooo!!
    -no holds barred- VT

  • Chuck

    Sandy’s first break dance lesson went horribly wrong

  • Lex Vegas

    This is why you don’t reveal the pregnancy to the father in public.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jordan-Oates/1476540021 Jordan Oates

    Teach me how to dougie

    jco5055@psu.edu

  • Bayon3twork

    Dethklok’s “Face Fisted” guido style

  • Jeff S

    At least the groom can make that Devin Townsend show that was scheduled during his honeymoon.

  • Foz

    No, you gotta get down like this… HRMPH. I’m telling you, I can see all the way up that lady’s dress from this angle.

  • twistedfreak

    Down on the upside

  • Foz

    A SNIPER, SHI -.

  • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com/ amelia

    “I SAID kill I Killed the Prom Queen, not kill the prom queen!”

    • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com/ amelia

      a Bride on the Dance Floor can put a crimp in the evening, but Blood on the Dance Floor will ruin your whole fucking week.

  • T-Money

    A lifetime My Dying Bride fan, Bryan never quite imagined it ending like this.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jesse-Potter/154000893 Jesse Potter

    I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may Razor’s Edge the bride.

  • EyeHateJuggalos

    And so it was with a powerbomb that the couple realized that “Raining Blood” may not have been the best choice for a first dance.

  • poopy

    never bring your drunk transgender friend to a silent auction

  • Munk

    Do you see what happens when you leave the kitchen?!?!?!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

      haha, oh man

  • Edika

    This is what happens when the grooms bachelor takes place in a WWF and Ultimate Fighting shows instead of the good old fashion striptease shows. Women don’t be all high and mighty, help keep strip joints alive…for your sake.

  • emetal

    a failed frog-leap in a moshpit at an emmure wedding

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Fritz-Pettersen/536945538 Fritz Pettersen

    To drunk to fuck

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ian-Smith/507358528 Ian Smith

    Tr00 Slam Dancing.

  • Rob

    Perhaps we should ask Oderus what happened?

  • BruisedMetal

    were gonna turn this shit into breakin 2 electric boogaloo! seriously

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alex-Whiskeycore-Beercore/707673007 Alex Whiskeycore Beercore

    Ken Shamrock made the Non Sammich Maker tap out with a furious Ankle lock

  • Tyler Critzman

    See? I told you Hardcore Dancing Is Stupid!

  • TIM

    “YOU RECKON THIS IS BAD, WAIT TILL THE HONEYMOON”

  • TimFlames

    Is that Owen Hart’s wife?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Tommy-Smith/536128956 Tommy Smith

    My Dying Bride

  • keaur

    See I told you it was real tile.

  • AY

    Everybody’s doing the Toxic Waltz, if you hit the floor you can always crawl…

  • Cryzthormagnusian

    When “You Got Served” moves go wrong.

  • Mercyful_Kris

    …And the new genre Receptioncore was born.

  • Doc

    That’s the problem with the huge ventriloquist dolls – you can only get your arm in so far and, dammit, they’re top-heavy when not seated.

  • K. Ramirez

    Next time…those dishes better be done.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Rowan/531575311 Christopher Rowan

    Honet, I siad Smell The Glove not smell the floor!

    crowan83@gmail.com

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Rowan/531575311 Christopher Rowan

      oops, it’s still early…

      Honey, I siad Smell The Glove not the floor!

  • Dingas McCloud

    That’s not what I meant when I requested Twisted Sister

  • Tyler Adelsperger

    But babe… You said you wanted Slayer to play our wedding.

  • http://www.myspace.com/giantofthemountain Giantofthemountain

    BITCH I SAID NO MAYONNAISE

  • christian

    Does your date hang low, does she wobble to and fro?

  • http://www.schenkeltown.com Schenkeltown

    wedding core is br00tal

    • http://www.facebook.com/slayerx1x Amir Palma

      haha good one

  • ZOOM

    Breaking III: Whitey’s Revenge

  • Metal Fuckin’ Dave

    I’ll bet you a hundred dollars that by the end of this dance, I will have convinced you to get plastic surgery.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Casey-Carnage/1021412523 Casey Carnage

    Man to woman: “So THIS is a front face nose grind?!?!?!”

    casey@carnagecrew.net

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christian-Varg-Voltaggio/1409575074 Christian Varg Voltaggio

    And thus the one man table top was born…

  • Boogyman

    ….Damn….Where did the mosh pit go !!!

  • http://www.myspace.com/thedaisyanthesis martin_rb

    Sharpshooter FAIL.

  • Bill Tallman

    they said it was a hoe down

  • tdwscott

    silly jew, your supposed to smash a GLASS, not your new piece of ass.

  • dan

    The names Chase Malone bitch….

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Cortez/1063430808 Michael Cortez

    i saw this on danicing with the stars…

  • jason stephens

    I told you not to do so many shots at Jr’s reception!

  • andy watson

    When the bitch try to get at ya

    drop it like it’s hot
    drop it like it’s hot
    drop it like it’s hot

  • Chris

    Hmm most people choose a waltz or a simple dance for their first dance as husband and wife. She opted for the Break dance…and you know what she brought a whole new meaning to break dance, and a new move the face spin.

  • Dave B

    WARNING!
    Drunk white people may be attempting “The Worm”.

  • Cody

    It’s “put your HANDS in the air” Honey….btw, people are watching

  • Jaron

    Justin Bieber, in dress, showing off some new dance moves.

  • Christina

    I know you want to be on that dumb ass show “jersey shore’, but I think it’s called a “fist pump” not “face pump” or “floor pump”.

  • mychael_c

    your doing it wrong

  • thehobliks

    brideflip no one cares

  • thehobliks

    brideflip no one cares

    thehobliks@gmail.com

  • MeStee;

    “LOOK HONEY I SHOW U HOW TO FREEZE”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ceil-Matampuhin/100000814423875 Ceil Matampuhin

    “IM OKAY HONEY IM NOT DRUNK! IM…JUST….LOOKIN FOR MY CONTACTS (LENS)”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ceil-Matampuhin/100000814423875 Ceil Matampuhin

    “IM OKAY HONEY IM NOT DRUNK! IM…JUST….LOOKIN FOR MY CONTACTS (LENS)”

    mcagtiamson@yahoo.com

  • Metrognome

    Hardcore dancing at the wedding reception made Sally yearn for the days when knowing the Locomotion and the Bird Dance was sufficient for the party.

  • Matt

    “Hey! I found a penny.”

  • metalmeathammer666

    The Wedding Slammer

  • http://www.twitter.com/davinci4life Jefferson

    “Mom, Can I play the wii now ?? I am not taking NO for answer”

  • LeatherSnake

    Didn’t think turning my Real-Doll into a Hand-Puppet would be this heavy to pick up. Shit’s starting to look awkward here at Grandma&Grandpa’s Anniversary, for my first Ventriloquist gig.
    -signed Jr.

  • http://facebook bryan253

    I’m Alright, Almost Lost My Balance!

  • http://www.ecdj.net Kyle Dennis

    Jersey shore wedding. Call it the head pump.

  • http://www.ecdj.net Kyle Dennis

    Jersey shore wedding. Call it the head pump!

  • http://www.ecdj.net Kyle Dennis

    A Jersey shore wedding. Call it the head pump!

  • http://www.hookinmouth.net EvilivE

    I love an open bar too!

  • http://www.prettydeece.com John Flude

    I dont think this is what his buddies had in mind when they said “Lets bang up some Brides Maids tonight!!”

  • Tom

    a game of musical floor tiles gets out of hand in the race for the last brown tile

    tlbraund@hotmail.com

  • Greg

    I think she’s out cold enough for me to take her home

  • Terry Lodahl

    It’s a WOMENS breakdance contest, get off the floor asshole!!!

  • Paulie

    You said you wanted taupe tiles. Here, look closely and tell me that’s not taupe.

  • BruisedMetal

    “This is totally going on my facebook”

  • Astrid

    Now… eat it! :)

  • eric

    woman gets fisted on the dance floor at local wedding.. the fister quotes “everything was going good until she started twisting around trying to get me on that g-spot”

  • dspang

    Job for Floor Boy

  • this is me

    some Twisted Sister fans just take the name too seriously…

  • MK

    Use brown flagstones!

  • Gary

    welcome to florida where beating and/or faceplanting your wife is still considered a sport.

  • JT Ohlhausen

    And that my friends is why girls shouldnt try to kickflip off the the wedding cake counter while drunk…. or high

  • Isaac

    PILEDRIVER.

  • Dropped on my head as a child

    Thats the last time she’ll make him a bad sandwich

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Tom-Horton/1074905683 Tom Horton

    “Dude , you were suppossed to throw the garter, not her mother ”

    vulgardisplay21@aol.com

  • casey williamson

    Jenny never had a grasp on tradition.
    SOMETHING GOLD, SOMETHING NEW, SOMETHING BORROWED, SOMEONE TURNING BLUE.

  • Kody Coats

    I told you to stay in the TRUCK!! *BAM!*

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Darren--Brink/605203918 Darren ↯ Brink

    ..shortly after she drank the “panty remover” she did a little dance called “the face eraser”.

  • Declan

    She did always say that she’d rather break her face than dance with a dude wearing a purple shirt.

  • Three77

    Ho-down!

  • Danny

    Rachel got hit with a double whammy…She’s a narcoleptic with restless leg syndrome.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ricky-Cali/752885370 Ricky Cali

    SODOMY, DAMN NEAR KILLED ME

  • richard faulkner

    JERSEY FLORR!!!

  • Ade

    Barbara had literally fallen head over heals for gary.

  • http://red5standingby@fsmail.net simon

    “Valiently floorred”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-Santerre/1471627855 Jay Santerre

    I know my keys are in here, somewhere.

  • tim

    “For the last time, NO, I am not the fucking Situation!!”

  • k.p.

    News: Women laid out after she tries to start mosh pit after multiple Budwisers and listening to Valient Thorr’s new Album “Stranger” on repeat at a friend weddng.

  • Dick Banger

    Dammit Kourtney Love he’s not coming back

  • scott roby

    Couple in the background: “She found Satan’s glory hole.”

    Guy in the pink shirt: “Bullshit, lemme see….”

  • scott

    “I swear the chick in the blue dress is a dude, look at those legs.” “Be cool, I’m gonna create a diversion and you look up her dress.”

  • 1_2_3

    “You like that bitch? Next time I tell you to do laundry, don’t turn my shirts pink!”

  • rockaroller

    She broke my heart, so I broke her face.

  • ball kicker

    When Billy found out that all of the girls at the party were cross-dressers, he just started shit-housin’ people.

  • Vinsanity

    Valiant face hammer to the ground!!!!

  • Thorriette

    After he accidently face slammed the hottest bridesmade, by trying to score points with some bad ass Dirty Dancing moves, he knelt down to checkout the damage. He soon realized that he is NO Patrick Swayze and that she is gonna be needing some Jennifer Grey nose work done herself :/

  • der

    Courtney Love’s desperate attempt to rejoin Faith No More by impersonating the fish from ‘Epic’

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ryan-Nelsen/592137871 Ryan Nelsen

    Thats why were listening to the first Metallica album at the wedding.

  • WyldeRhoads

    Too bad “The Corpse Bride” was animated, she would have been a shoe-in.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sheila-Palkoski/789838584 Sheila Palkoski

    ” come on baby! put yr hands up what are you waitin for? ” ~Valient Thorr himself

  • You? Me?

    I guess Krist Novoselic found out Kurt Cobain had a sex change

  • BILL

    Its not his fault, they did say it was a ho-down.

  • ball kicker

    ♪♪You gotta feel it, EPILEPTIC! (Boogee! Woogee! Woogee!) ♪♪

  • 666aeon666

    am….I….am….I Finally out this fucking marriage?

  • Ade

    See a penny pick it up and all that day you’ll have good lu….. oh.

  • william john

    honey… leave dat pygmy alone… for christ’s sake

  • sasha

    no, no..i said BASS DROP

  • Jesse

    Facial La FLOOR!

  • The_Dude

    when jen said she was a headbanger i dont think jim got it entirely

  • Tyler

    NOW GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME A SANDWICH!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Richard-Adragna/18902481 Richard Adragna

    WASPs + Stage Diving = EPIC FAIL!

    adragnarichard@gmail.com

  • Twerp

    John just couldn’t help backin da ass up… Unfortunately… Karin wasn’t ready

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  • argpirate

    You’re gonna tell the doctor you fell into a door knob. I love you. Stop crying.

  • Joseph

    This linoleum should go great with the 13 glasses of Pinot Noir you already had…

  • Oblivion

    No dreams breed in face-plant induced sleep. \m/

  • Geoff

    No, you throw the garter AFTER you take it off!

  • Lee

    Bend over to the front touch your toes
    throw your face to the ground and break your nose

  • Peter

    The Swiffer Wet Jet gentle cleans the floor…

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