Upcoming Bullsh*t

Tool Think They’re Willy Wonka, Might Be Right


Maynard WonkaI had no intention of purchasing Tool’s upcoming reissue of Opiate, since a) I already own that album, and b) let’s be real, that is nobody’s favorite Tool release. But after  reading this on The PRP, I might have to go ahead and buy a copy or twenty:

“Tool’s forthcoming 21st anniversary reissue of their Opiate EP will come with a little something extra—if you’re lucky. Five copies of the commemorative edition will randomly include a ‘Seal Of Xatanitos.’ Ever a band of mystery, the details of that prize will only be disclosed to those who actually manage to win it.”

So it’s possible that the winners will get a cool tour at the end of which one lucky fan will inherit the band, and it’s also possible all you win is a piece of Maynard’s used toilet paper. I have to imagine that whatever the prize is, though, it will be on the cooler side.

The reissue comes out March 26 and can be purchased on the band’s official website… although I don’t see an order link so you’ll have to figure that shit out yourself. I can’t do EVERYTHING for you dopes.

Metal Sucks Greatest Hits