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Motionless in White are Still a Band, Still Really Popular; Sign with Roadrunner Records

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Dudes, this is a serious question: am I out of touch? Or, more aptly, how out of touch am I?

Generic, mid-’00s metalcore is alive and well! And Motionless in White are living proof.

Last time I checked in with Motionless in White they sounded like an Atreyu cover band straight out of 2002. I just listened to their new single “570”… and they still sound like an Atreyu cover band straight out of 2002.

This kind of music is still popular? Fuck me naked with a spoon. I thought the whole good cop / bad cop vocal thing was done. I also thought it wasn’t possible for bands to continue ripping off Swedish death metal riffs from 1995 any more than they already have. Are the members of Motionless in White even aware they’re ripping off Swedish death metal riffs from 1995 or do they just live in a bubble consisting entirely of “edgy” makeup and generic breakdowns?

But I digress. Apparently this kind of music is still a thing, and what’s more it’s apparently still big business: the brass at Roadrunner thought there was enough of a market for it to sign Motionless in White, probably for big bucks. And I’m going to assume Roadrunner knows what they’re doing here, and that this band has oodles of fans, based on their millions of YouTube views.

I’m out of touch. I give up.

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