MetalSucks

All this talk about Slash’s upcoming solo album has got me playing “Fantasy Velvet Revolver” in my head once again. Though I still hold out hope that Axl’s idea of having Perry Farrell front the band comes to fruition, I know in my heart that there’s probably a better chance of Scott Weiland rejoining the band, which is admittedly a pretty remote possibility. Remote like Siberia.

So looking through the list of vocalists purportedly gracing the axeman’s new record, I see a number of qualified albeit unlikely candidates to fill Weiland’s still-vacant spot. Yeah, it would be a heavy music lover’s dream to have Ozzy Osbourne sing for the band, considering the craptastic nature of his last few solo albums. Realistically, that would be an unholy managerial nightmare with the potential capacity to yield a catastrophic clusterfuck to put the legal woes of Black Sabbath and Guns N’ Roses to shame. Dave Grohl’s too busy counting his money and playing geriatric rock with his idols to commit to yet another band. These days, Alice Cooper and Lemmy Kilmister have the commercial drawing power of, well, Alice Cooper and Lemmy Kilmister, and maybe would shift a few more units than a Velvet Revolver fronted by an unknown (anyone remember Eric Dover or Rod Jackson?) or that dude from Spacehog. Don’t even get me started on Fergie.

One other name on that list, however, actually makes sense…

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This might be the least metal thing Boris has ever done. It sounds more like a Sigur Ros record! Still, this got me thinking perhaps I should have picked Wata over Atsuo in Reign In Blonde’s Hottest Chicks In Metal bracket.

If you’re still interested – and I’ll understand if you’re not - Japanese Heavy Rock Hits Vol. 3 releases in vinyl and digital formats on Tuesday November 24 via Southern Lord.

-GS

[Gary Suarez can't read your poker face. He usually manages WHOLLY DIVER (a Dio tribute site) and the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

Some people are talented. Some people are awesome. An even rarer breed happens to be both talented and awesome. Photographer Justina Villanueva is one of those people. If you go to metal shows in New York or New Jersey, you may have noticed this diminutive young lady snapping pics of some of your favorite acts. You may have seen her work on websites like ours (ex. Alice In Chains at Irving Plaza) and BrooklynVegan (ex. Converge at Europa).

Now’s a great time to acquaint yourself with Ms. Villanueva’s work, as she has just released the premiere issue of her self-titled zine. Issue 1: Basements, Blood and Noise features spectacular shots of bands like Black Anvil, Burnt By The Sun, Marduk, Municipal Waste, and Poison The Well, as well as the aforementioned AIC. Whether you’re an old fucker like me or a youngster that has never so much as seen a zine, I strongly recommend that you buy yourself a copy.

-GS

[Gary Suarez is a lover of fine art. He usually manages Wholly Diver (a Dio tribute site) and the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

Believe it or not, Doro is one of my guiltiest metal pleasures. Ever since I first saw the video for Warlock’s “All We Are”, I’ve been quite the fan. And though America hasn’t been particularly receptive to Doro’s charms since the 1980s, you gotta admit that MILF-y frontwoman Doro Pesch is the hardest working woman in the European metal scene, the foxier female equivalent of U.D.O’s Udo Dirkschneider. So it didn’t exactly surprise me that this morning, while seeking out lineup information for next year’s Wacken Open Air festival, I chanced upon this tasty newsworthy morsel:

Germanys rocklady nr. 1 will celebrate her 2500 show on 03/13/2010 in Düsseldorf – and YOU have the chance to be there.

You can get your tickets at the following link

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…because if you do, I’d really like this Dio denim jacket. That would be fucking rad.

-GS

[Gary Suarez is like a rainbow in the dark. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

Twitter is arguably the most powerful tool available to musicians today, its micro-blogging mechanism allowing for real-time dissemination of information as well as a venue for direct communication open discussion with fans. Sadly, too many bands focus so heavily on the first of these benefits (Shadows Fall are a prime example of Twitter fan abuse, their profile replete with repeat tweets) that they squander any chance of actually connecting with their supporters. Interestingly, one musician who actually “gets” Twitter comes from a generation of rockers you’d expect to not “get” Twitter. His name is Glenn Hughes.

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Sure, Craig Goldy, you didn’t play guitar on Dio’s classic albums (Holy Diver, The Last In Line, Sacred Heart), and even decades later you remain in the shadow of Vivian Campbell. And yeah “I Could Have Been A Dreamer” doesn’t hold a candle to “Rainbow In The Dark”, but today is your birthday, Big Guy, and on behalf of all the MetalSucks maniacs I wish you a super duper day!

Don’t forget to send Craig some birthday tweets!

-GS

[Gary Suarez is a ward of the state. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

Back in 1996, I was an angst-ridden young buck, and the only kind of music I truly cared about was industrial rock. Indeed, it was at the tail of a gilded age for the subgenre, the door to commercial success having been opened a few years earlier by major-label breakthrough artists like Nine Inch Nails and Ministry as well as notable independent label acts like long-slogging innovators KMFDM. If you have ever owned music from bands like God Lives Underwater or Gravity Kills, you know exactly what I’m talking about, brother.

That same year also saw the major release of a self-titled debut from SKOLD, a dark electronic project from a former member of glammy metal act Shotgun Messiah, a group that had toyed with industrial rock on their final album Violent New Breed. Though there wasn’t a bad song in the bunch, the highlights included machinist’s slog “Dust To Dust” and soaring dystopian anthem “Neverland.” Though mastermind Mr. Tim Skold would move on to lengthy stints with Marilyn Manson (refer to: The Golden Age Of Grotesque, arguably the band’s finest record) and the aforementioned KMFDM, this now woefully out-of-print album–and occasionally accompanying promo VHS cassette–has always held a special plate in my withered heart. This is is why I am so pleased to report that after thirteen (13!) long years, Mr. Skold has revived this long dormant solo act.

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Yes, my fellow connoisseurs of all things heavy, today is the day you’ve been waiting for: NIRVANA DAY! As you all well know, November 3rd sees the release of several Nirvana and Nirvana-related releases. For those of you who haven’t already created your NIRVANA DAY CHECKLIST, here’s a handy cheat sheet of the day’s releases:

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Some months back, Chris Cornell took the first step to undo the self-inflicted damage caused by his god-awful Timbaland-produced solo album Scream: he re-recorded one of its songs as a straightforward soft rock tune. Since then, the former Soundgarden and Audioslave frontman has taken some considerable steps towards restoring his rocker reputation, including performing John Lennon’s “Imagine” on the September 11th episode of The Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien and unexpectedly reuniting grunge rock one-off Temple Of The Dog at a recent Pearl Jam concert.

Now comes news that the much maligned Scream will receive a full-blown “rework” to better reflect the rest of Cornell’s easily digested radio-friendly solo discography. Though, Cornell has yet to make any public statement about this, the existence of another re-recorded Scream cut says it all. Listen to this new version of “Never Far Away” and imagine just how positively banal Scream (Naked) will ultimately sound.

-GS

[Gary Suarez is simply irresistible. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

Upon first hearing that Eyehategod would be performing a New York City show on a boat, my immediate thought was, “That fucker is gonna sink.” My subsequent thought was, “I want to go to this.” And so I did. With a considerably steep $40 ticket price, one might think that attendees paid for the novelty of the experience, and to an extent, they’d be right. Yet coupled with headliner-quality openers like Pig Destroyer and Goatwhore, it was actually quite a bargain.

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Yeah, tomorrow is Halloween. And sure, you’re all excited to dress up as that dude from Watchmen or a slutty nurse/secretary/schoolgirl/turd and probably not thinking about Christmas just yet. Since it’s less than two months away, I can’t think of a more miserable way to honor/desecrate Jesus’ birthday than with some good ol’ fashioned holiday music performed by Judas Priest’s Rob Halford. That’s right: ROB HALFORD HAS A FUCKING CHRISTMAS ALBUM OUT. Here’s the single “Christmas Comes For Everyone”:

God, this is awful. If you’re a masochist, then go ahead and download the single for free at Halford’s website.

I’m buying this album for all of my MetalSucks colleagues for Hannukah, because I hate them.

-GS

[Gary Suarez is baking you a fruitcake. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

The title of this post is intentionally sarcastic, so please don’t get cranky or confused! Still, I think we all can agree that the traditional single has become ever rarer with the rise of digital downloads. Though still in circulation, 7″ singles maintain a tenuous, uncertain existence even in the punk and hardcore scene. Clearly the demand for vinyl exists in the metal community, as savvy indies large and small produce (sometimes limited) wax versions of their releases. This, then, is why I anticipate at least some of you will be happy to hear that The End Records will release a 7″ of brand-new music from Brooklyn noise rockers Goes Cube.

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With Converge’s critically acclaimed Axe To Fall still commanding the attention of the metallic hardcore faithful, this week’s release of a new album from Belgium’s Rise And Fall could naturally be overlooked. However, that would be to the detriment of those currently enjoying that higher-profile record. An intelligent, intense burst of recorded vehemence, Our Circle Is Vicious–which you can and should buy now–was (like so many Deathwish Inc. albums) produced by Converge’s Kurt Ballou and stands as a considerable improvement on 2005’s Into Oblivion. Listen to “Built On Graves” and “In Circles” at the band’s MySpace page.

The band play a few U.S. shows this week before heading back to Europe for a month-long tour with Iron Age, whose recent album The Sleeping Eye we streamed back in August and is on Vince’s “Best Of 2009″ shortlist. That tour culminates in Rise And Fall’s hometown of Gent, with a final show that also features Goatwhore, Skeletonwitch and Toxic Holocaust. The band will wrap up 2009 with a December tour through Australia, only to kick of the new year with a few gigs with labelmates The Hope Conspiracy. All dates are below.

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Since 1993, the furious duo of Amber Valentine and Edgar Livengood have been confounding and entertaining with their eclectic musical mix that frequently and wantonly crosses the boundaries between metal and rock. Jucifer’s unrestrained artistry has led to some pretty impressive albums, including two for Relapse Records: 2006’s If Thine Enemy Hunger and last year’s L’Autrichienne. As the band wraps up the latest round of its unending tour, I recently took the chance to pry a few answers out of the loquacious Mrs. Valentine.

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Dead on arrival.

(1 ½ out of 5 horns)

-GS

[Gary Suarez welcomes your constructive criticism. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

(special thanks to Erika for this awesome image)

Thank you for allowing me into your homes, your offices, your myriad mobile devices, and, most importantly, your hearts. This has been a truly blessed day and one that I will never forget. I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!

I’m back, bitches.

-GS

[Gary Suarez thinks you're the best reader of all. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

By now, it should be crystal clear to everyone just how I feel about Oceano. Considering the response to my 5/5 review of the Chicago band’s debut Depths, it seems only fitting that the day I take over MetalSucks is the day I get to share with you my interview with guitarist Andrew Mikhail, who opens up about illegal downloading, being labeled “deathcore”, and CDs as art.

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How could I take over this stupid-website-for-jerks for an entire day without doing a Melvins post?! Well, I guess the answer is “I can’t” because this is a Melvins post.

Amphetamine Reptile doesn’t actively sign or release just about anything anymore, which is a damn shame considering the number of amazing acts it unleashed upon the music world in its heyday. Thankfully, one of the few acts still affiliated with the Minneapolis-based label is The Melvins, who discreetly release a preposterously limited 7″ through AmRep roughly once a year to satisfy fanatical completists. (One such release featured a rendition of “The Star Spangled Banner” on the A-side and an unflinchingly true-to-the-original cover of Kiss’ “Detroit Rock City.” Yeah.)

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A little over a week ago, I still felt so very excited about Them Crooked Vultures, the supergroup featuring such rock stars Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters, Nirvana), Josh Homme (Kyuss, Queens Of The Stone Age), and John Paul Jones (some obscure 60s/70s band). With Grohl back behind the drums again and Homme as frontman, this somewhat clandestinely publicized grouping swelled with potential and promise.

Then, I saw them live.

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