SERIOUSLY, SOMEBODY SMACK TOMMY LEE IN THE MOUTH

Look: Tommy Lee’s gotta be one my favorite metal drummers of all time. But he’s also a trend-chaser. Anyone who denies it is willfully forgetting his oh-so-special Methods of Mayhem rap-metal project from a few years back (a project that, at least for a time, he actually left Motley Crue to pursue).

These days, Tommy chases the ghost of his fading stardom as a celebrity DJ – not spinning rock tunes the way, say, ex-Murderdolls guitarist/current Trashlight Vision frontman Acey Slade does, but spinning trance or jungle or trip-hop or whatever the fuck the kids are calling it these days. And in a recent interivew with ClubPlanet.com to promote his mad beatz skillz, he crossed the line, even of his own idiocy, to come off as nothing less than a poseur who needs to be shot in the knee caps.

In the interview, Lee states:

“I can’t believe it’s such a shock that I like dance music, because any time I’ve done anything with drums, I’ve always incorporated electro shit, always, always, always! When I’m at home, dance music is all I listen to! I’m actually kinda over rock music…”

I’m all for listening to non-metal music, I’m all for experimenting, but seriously, I have two huge problems with this statemnt:

1. To say you’re “over rock music” when you’re known primarily as a rock musician (well, actually, primarily as a well-hung accidental pornstar/punchline, but secondarily as a rock musician for sure) strikes me as pretty dumb. How the fuck are you gonna convincingly promote the inevitable umpteenth Crue reunion tour now that you’ve said that? Or are you not planning on ever going back to the Crue? ‘Cause, Tommy, baby, I know this DJing thing is really gonna take off any second now, just the same way Methods of Mayhem and your solo album really took off, but doncha think maybe you should have something to fall back on – just in case?
2. “Anytime” you’ve done something with drums you’ve “incorporated electro shit?” Really? ‘Cause I don’t remember any “electro shit” on any Motley Crue albums before Generation Swine. Unless you don’t count being the drummer for Motley Crue as “doing something with drums.”

Seriously: this jack-ass needs a publicist, and that publicist needs to tell him to shut the fuck up.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go “Get-g-get naked.”

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-AR