Seven Drummers We’d Be Happy to See Join Morbid Angel

  • Axl Rosenberg

morbid angel need a new drummerThe David Vincent/Morbid Angel situation is sad. Not because I’m particularly invested in Vincent being or not being in the band, but because even if “Evil D.” is out, Steve Tucker is in. In other words: there’s no fun to be had with fantasy casting a new frontman for the band.  BOO!!!

On the other hand, with Tim Yeung now out of the picture and no successor to his drum throne yet announced, we can do plenty of “Let’s play make believe!” YAY!!!

And so…

#1 – Dave LombardoDave Lombardo Re-Tweets

As promised, we are going to continue to suggest Lombardo for every decent metal band that needs a new drummer until someone finally hires him, or he dies, or we die, whichever comes first.

#2 – Pete SandovalPete_Sandoval

This is obviously the no-brainer pick, and the one about which fans would be most excited (probably — I imagine everyone would piss themselves and cry with excitement if Morbid Angel did somehow actually land Dave Lombardo). Sure, he’s a Christian now and it seems like he hates his former bandmates, but other bands have managed to see past such issues in order to reunite and make some coin, so…

#3 – Phil DuboisPhil Dubois-Coyne Drummer List

He just so happens to be available right now, and kids who only know Morbid Angel from the disastrous Wellud Neverum Livethisdownus or as one of the bands they didn’t see at Summer Slaughter 2014 because they left after The Faceless might be be encouraged to check ’em out.

#4 – Chris VrennaSeven Drummers We’d Be Happy to See Join Morbid Angel

Imagine if Trey Azagthoth was just, like, “Well, fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke,” and decided to actually continue to pursue the creative direction of Ileum Divinum Inanus? That would be kind of amazing, wouldn’t it? And if that were to actually happen, hey, why not lean into it and hire the dude who used to play drums for Nine Inch Nails and Marilyn Manson, right?

#5 – Meytal Cohenmeytal

This would be a total win-win, ’cause it would be a really progressive choice AND it would make so many Morbid Angel fanboys so incredibly angry that their only source of comfort would be listening to Altars of Madness while jerking off and crying themselves to sleep. Delicious!

#6 – Joey Jordisonjoey-jordison-new

Remember this guy? Where the hell did he go? It’s been a year-and-a-half since he was fired from Slipknot and even longer since the first Scar the Martyr album. He needs to do something, like, yesterday. That something might as well be Morbid Angel.

And finally, of course, there’s always…

#7 – Scott Hull’s Drum MachineHULL STUDIO 1

Although that’s a ridiculous suggestion — Morbid Angel could never afford him.

Who would YOU like to see replace Yeung in Morbid Angel? Make suggestions in the comments section below!

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