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Editorials

UNCLE KRACKER GETS READY FOR AN ASS POUNDING

 Friday, August 17th, 2007 at 1:39pm by

capt24d53f966f994781ab006f05d31c10bbpeople_uncle_kracker_wxs101.jpgKarma continues to be a bitch for all those who unleashed nu metal on the world: Uncle Kracker (né Matthew Shafer), the former DJ/hype man/nut swinger for rap metal schmuck Kid Suck, was arrested this morning in Raleigh, NC for a second-degree sex offense charge, according to The Associate Press.

But here’s the best part: when the news outlet tried to call Kracker’s manager for comment, they found that they were unable to – because his phone was disconnected. So things are clearly on the up and up for this douche.

Kracker (mugshot above) joins ex-Dope/ex-Murderdolls/ex-Static-X guitarist Tripp Eisen in the “Nu Metal Shitheads-turned-Rapists” club. We hope Kracker and his new husband, Bubba, have a real nice honeymoon together in Cellblock C.

-AR

  • NuMallCore Pwns YoMama

    I know that there’s a “follow me and everything will be alright” joke in here somewhere. I just know it!

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  • http://www.nemrosim.blogspot.com/ AWB

    Drat! I just heard about this today – 1 year, 2 months and 6 days later.

    So this is old and probably no one will read this, but I wonder, they said it was “a second-degree sex offense charge” which isn’t likely to be actual rape – more likely statutory or something else…Far less.

    Nevertheless, I only listened to Kid Rock once like a decade ago – I’m more of a Black Metal guy, but “Bawitdaba” sounded retarded enough to make sense to everyone around me at the time…That and perhaps “American Badass” which basically had it’s music sampled from a Metallica song “Sad But True”…Way to repackage something for money…Oddly enough it’s this sorta shit that works.

  • Pingback: HOW THE FUCK IS UNCLE KRACKER NOT IN PRISON RIGHT NOW? | MetalSucks