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Cinemetal

SYNCHRONIZED NUTSACK-SWINGING, WITH YOUR HOSTS, GERMAN METAL SUPERSTARS ACCEPT!

 Tuesday, July 15th, 2008 at 9:54am by

acceptSo I was listening to Accept’s landmark Balls to the Wall last night, and I decided to head on over to YouTube to enjoy the video fruits of the five leather-clad German men. Which is when I was reminded of the question I’ve always had about Accept… what the fuck is that singer doing in the band?? He looks nothing like the rest of them. It’s almost like their real singer was absent the day of the video shoot and the grip on the set was the best replacement they could come up with. Seriously. What UP with that dude?? And on top of that, his voice, though awesome, is completely different from any other singer at the time this side of Kevin DuBrow. Don’t get me wrong, I love Accept. Including this video. But man… what the fuck? I suppose the last laugh’s on him, because here I am playing their video 20 some odd years later.

Anyway, this video is a classic. Because NOTHING screams metal more than synchronized choreographed guitar routines. NOTHING. EXCEPT FOR WRECKING BALLS KNOCKING SHIT DOWN AND DUDES HEADBANGING INTO A WALL! My inner Beavis just came a little.

[Thanks to the asshats at SonyBMG who don’t seem to understand that I’d be giving them free advertising by embedding the video here, you’ll have to click here to watch it. They are losing views by making me link out. I’ve linked to the unofficial version just to smite them. Update: thanks to MetalSucks reader Pick-Axe Bobby who let us know about Roxwel, who have the video and allow embeds. Thanks!

-VN

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  • Elync

    I saw this video several months ago and made a couple of observances. In the beginning, watch the bassist. He holds his guitar in the most awesome way I’ve ever seen! The at 1:19, the weirdest thing happens: one of the guitarists puts his ax on Udo’s head. It seems so random, but simply adds to the awesomeness that is heavy metal. \m/

    ~Elync

  • Jim

    Dissing on Udo? Bad choice, he’s short, he’s camoflouged, and he’s got heavy balls at his command, he’ll fuck your shit up good. Plus he’s German, which just leads to all kinds of scat play and genocide. I pity you your few short hours that you have left. Udo will abide until it is time to pull a miniature blitzkrieg on you, then it is all over.

  • Maidenjoemama

    Udo in Accept = Paul Di’Anno in Iron Maiden

  • Ben

    Just to SPITE them…just saying. And Udo does sound like the perfect combination of Bon Scott and Brian Johnson.

  • catsaremetal

    Who cares if Udo has short hair? Accept wasn’t that great when he went solo.

  • http://countshockula.blogspot.com ezra

    Udo rules, And, Udo Dirkschneider (or however you spell it) is probably the most metal name ever.
    And he’s the Patton Oswalt of metal.

  • http://www.roxwel.com Pick-Axe Bobby

    He’s the GAY Patton Oswalt of metal.

  • http://www.roxwel.com Pick-Axe Bobby

    Honestly, I have no idea what that means.

  • Elync

    LAWL @ That.

  • Joe A.

    This post is an example of how this site occasionally redeems itself from certain mediocre metalcore to nu-metal worship. False prophets and their idols be damned, hail glorious METAL!

  • http://www.sithomeandrot.com/celebs/ manny

    Udo is the one who founded Accept so you should be asking why everyone else looks out of place.

    Udo Dirkschneider = METAL

  • http://countshockula.blogspot.com ezra

    Is Oswalt all that straight? Besides, my girlfriend always calls Oswalt the Udo Dirkschneider of comedy, after all, he did come first.
    Remember, not only does he have heavy balls at his command, and his odd little head fits perfectly in the crotch of a flying V. He’s also “Fast as a Shark” a pretty dangerous combo if you ask me.

  • Sammy

    OMG Pick-Axe! That’s fucking awesome. The gay Patten Oswalt. Fucking rules, man.

    Udo is unique, that’s for sure.

  • bob

    If you refer to Udo as “that singer”, you should’nt be writing about metal. Simple as that.

  • Dude Manbro

    “BTTW” was a pretty decent record but man oh man, the cover art & the poster that came w/ the album was gayer than 10 men blowing 11 men.

  • Iron Argy

    Worst post ever. Dissing UDO? There is no one more metal than him.