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Kingdom of Sorrow Sucks

KIRK WINDSTEIN’S FIVE BEST FOODS TO TRY IN NEW ORLEANS

Tuesday, June 8th, 2010 at 11:00am by

New Orleans isn’t just known for it’s metal and sludge music — it’s also a hot bed for good eats! If you’re planning on traveling here, give these dishes a whirl, and wash ‘em down with a daiquiri!

(YES, the picture is real. You can actually go to a DRIVE THROUGH and buy booze here in Louisiana!)

#5 – Shrimp, Oysters, Crawfish

Despite the recent environmental issues with the aftermath of Katrina and now the horrendous oil spill, you can still get some really good local and farm-raised shellfish. When Jasta comes to town, I take him to the Harbor, where we destroy about fifteen pounds of Crawfish. I like to suck the face off!

#4 – Po Boy Sandwich from Mother’s (Crawfish, Shrimp or Oyster)

You haven’t lived until you’ve had a Po Boy in Nola.

#3 – Char Grill Oysters from Drago’s

It’s said that Mel Gibson loves this place… lots of celebs go there to enjoy these bad boys. I’ll suck down thirty-six in one sitting!

#2 – Muffaletta sandwich from Central Grocery

Muffaletta is a round, “Italian” sandwich piled with more meat than Carnie Wilson giving Mo’nique a piggy back ride! However, the defining and best quality of a mufaletta is the olive salad.


#1 – Gumbo from Acme’s Oyster House

People wait in line for a long time just to get a bowl or cup of this goodness!

After you try this you shall thank the old one by buying me a cold one!

Since I took the time to write this you should take the time to check out this bad ass shirt!

And for the truly daring, try the turtle soup at Commander’s or the blackened gator at The Harbor.

Gator tastes good, don’t be scared!

I also advise on trying a BEIGNET (pronounced ben-YAY) — it’s a light, flaky, hollow doughnut covered with powdered sugar. You can get real good ones Cafe Du Monde.

So next time you’re in Nola, give it a whirl and lemme know whatchya think!

-KW

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  • Spanky

    Yummy

  • Seanicus

    I concur on all account, though I don’t know how you don’t get the ham poyboy at Mothers. Their ham is astounding.

    I recently drove almost three hours to get my hands on Central Grocery’s Olive Salad, at $17 a quart, because nothing else is as good.

    • battleid

      Ive got to say the Mothers best poboy is the Roast Beef Debri Poboy, but all other times i say shrimp or fish poboys.

      thankfully im at the alabama coast now so i can go eat some seafood……now!

      i do have to buy Central Grocery olive salad next time im in town….down to a third of a jar.

  • Genial Gentile

    Essential Grub. Gator is delicious.
    For those who care: Dax Riggs is playing a show a week all this month at One Eyed Jacks in NOLA.

  • WowWee!

    Now I know where to eat if I go to New Orleans, thanks Old One!

  • http://heavystreet.com Sat

    Kirk…..wheres the vegan, vegetarian, low calorie spots in New Orleans?!?!?

    • http://www.myspace.com/trials Mark Sugar

      hahaha…i went to NOLA once with two vegans. They nearly starved to death. I remember them asking a waiter, “Do you have anything without meat in it?” And he said “Well, there’s chicken!” Fucking awesome.

      • Genial Gentile

        Haha! That’s classic.

    • DemonicLemming

      Vegans in the south…now that’s funny right there.

      • TXHellbilly

        Is that so hard to believe? And you say people in the South are closed-minded…

        • DemonicLemming

          I just find it ironic, is all.

          I’m from the south, arguably, so I’m not really calling anyone closed-minded, just the idea of a group of vegans wandering around the birthplace of some of the best barbecue in the world is sort of funny.

  • Phil

    Detroits got drive thru liquor stores everywhere cause we’re blue collar lazy fucks remember!

  • Brian Koz

    Gator is the shit. It’s like chicken with a fishy texture.

  • DemonicLemming

    Donuts and crocodile looks good, but goddamn do Cajuns eat some weird-ass shit.

    • Isaac

      Dude, I’m a northerner myself and I would demolish that shit.

  • jackattack

    It’s a life goal of mine to eat the original incarnation of the muffaleta at Central Grocery. I can imagine it being blissful.

  • SourDeez

    Hell yeah, blackened gator. What’s more metal than that?

  • loganarchy

    What does turtle taste like? Gator is amazing

  • soy el niño más bonito

    fuck me i gotta head down to NOLA

  • orbital

    that t-shirt’s fucking baaws.

    We have drive through beer stores here. Too bad the selection isn’t worth taking advantage of that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-P-Stine/1314021455 Anthony P Stine

    That pic of a drive through bar makes me not want to visit Louisiana.

  • djabthrash

    nom nom nom

  • KC

    I was going to comment on how you didn’t include beignetts in the list, but you added them in there late. Cafe Du Monde makes me want to move to NOLA. So glad my wife has family down there though, gives me a reason to visit once a year.

    • paganheart

      Spent my honeymoon in NOLA, gained back every one of the 5 pounds I lost (plus a couple more) the week before my wedding…LOL…probably my fondest memory is having coffee and beignets at Cafe Du Monde every morning of that week. Amazing food everywhere we went, we braved the lines to get muffalettas at Central Grocery and gumbo at Acme, I don’t eat oysters but my husband still raves about the ones he had there. We had dinner at Commander’s Palace, probably the most expensive meal I’ve ever had but definitely one of the very best, turtle soup was different but very good! And don’t forget about pralines, pralines are everywhere in New Orleans and somehow they taste better there than the ones you get anywhere else…and DAMN, it doesn’t matter what drink you order or where you order it, they mix em STRONG in Louisiana!!! Okay, I’m hungry now, I gotta get me back to NOLA and soon!

  • Future Ruins

    Good call Kirk! Being from NOLA, I’d suggest the Ferdi sandwich with debris at Mother’s. Also Bozo’s in Metairie has the best fried oysters I’ve ever had.

    • Genial Gentile

      Gotta have the debris! Good call.

      • Future Ruins

        Jeez I am seriously craving that shit now. Gonna have to take a trip down and get one along with a overstuffed shrimp poboy.

    • ABdozen

      Mother’s is soooooo good

  • http://www.heavyblogisheavy.com/ Alkahest

    I live in Kentucky and there’s a local liquor store that has a drive through.

  • Viking_xxx

    Last time I ate a Po Boy I got massive diarrhea!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Peter-Tomis/621582836 Peter Tomis

    Gator is delicious. My girlfriend works at a restaurant here in California called Bon Temp’s creole cafe where they serve most of the stuff listed here. My personal favorite is the muffaletta however the one pictured looks like it trumps the ones i have enjoyed by a long shot.

  • http://thenumberoftheblog.com Snagon

    muffaletta is great I eat it up here in NJ. But I would love the authentic one down in NOLA

  • Deathexplosion

    i’m adding Kirk to next year’s Death Pool.already got 2 so far(John Wooden & Dio).

  • GoingDeaf?

    Man, this just proves that the 2 days I spent in NOLA were a colossal FAIL. Lesson learned… don’t go on road trips with people who aren’t interested in anything interesting.

  • Primateforever

    I need crawfish ASAFuckingP.

  • Sandman

    The Muffaletta from central grocery is fucking awesome. It’s the one thing I crave from my last trip to NOLA 2 years ago almost. It’s a shame true Muffaletta don’t exist anywhere else.

  • Jessi

    I miss drive through daquairi’s, LA is awesome just for that alone!! Molther’s..never been able to stand the line. New Orleans food is the best!!

  • dave

    Boudin deserves a place on this list.

    In addition to some of the already noted awesome things to get at mothers, the etoufee and turtle soup are the shit.

  • Bonnie

    Smackin’ my lips! Katrina tore me away from my N’awlins roots…been stuck in Chicago since then, anyone out there wanna sponsor me a trip back home??
    Lived in Lakeview just 2 doors Down from Phil Anselmo…I was driving home one
    day and Phil was standin’ outside his house —we had a “moment’ …lol… our eyes
    locked as I passed by, always wonder if he remembers this….yea, I’m a hopeless
    romantic! Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans?? Could sure eat me
    some great N’awlins food right now! C’mon sponsor me!!

  • FongChung

    ACME OYSTER HOUSE!!!! HOLY SHIT!!! Awesome fucking joint in Nola. If you also want to spend the bucks, go to KPauls for some amazing Cajun food! Not to mention Mothers is awesome as well. Ahhhh man I need some Crawfish!