MORE METAL THAN A KISS KOFFIN: HAVE YOUR ASHES PRESSED INTO VINYL

Monday, September 20th, 2010 at 4:00pm by

Do you love vinyl? I mean, really love vinyl? Like, you’re super-pissed that CDs, cassettes, 8-tracks, mp3s, and whatever the fuck ever came along? If you’re that obsessed, we have some good news for you — when you die, this company called And Vinyly (clever!) will press your ashes into a vinyl.

Seriously.

From the company’s website:

Needless to say, it’s not a super-cheap way to leave something behind for you loved ones, although I think it’s probably still less money than a “proper” burial; I know my folks pay a shitload of money every year just upkeeps on their parents’ graves, and if we’d just had them made into a record, those costs would certainly be diminished.

Some other interesting facts about And Vinyly:

  • They also do pets, although, kind of mysteriously, there’s no discount for dog/cat/whatever vinyls.
  • They’ll help you distribute your record “through reputable vinyl stores worldwide.” I’m heading over to Generation Records right now to see if they’d consider stocking some of my remains.
  • They’ll help arrange your funeral (or “FUNeral,” as they call it) if you want; of course, your record will played at the service.
  • If you still wanna be buried, they’ll also make you a vinyl from an individual body part or parts (“cremated please!”), although, as with the pets, it’s the same price as just doing a whole person.

So in conclusion: If there’s a way to make money, someone will think of it.

-AR

Thanks to Martin Brooks for the tip!

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  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shaun-Reeves/100000774753955 Shaun Reeves

    This is possibly the creepiest thing I have ever heard of.

  • Cladgemeister

    I hope I’m somewhere near America when I die.

  • Kasper Maigaard

    want.

  • LoGs the shit

    I’m not sure whether to be impressed or very disturbed

  • El Peras

    That’s really and “All that Remains” album…

    • AetherJake

      Gottem!

    • http://www.twistedcritic.wordpress.com Chris

      Is there an additional charge for auto-tune?

  • BC

    Is it weird that this fascinates me and I can picture myself being played to all the mourners at my funeral?

  • dakotahowe

    Okay..now I feel really fucking ignorant. And vinyly? Explain please.

    • big p

      I believe its suppose to sound like “and finally”

  • Gaia

    Old

  • akimboma

    do they do multiple people for the price of one? could I get a chorus of ashes to go out with?

  • sylvesterlowery

    I’ll have my ashes pressed on some funeral doom!
    Of course, it would only be two songs as you are allowed 24 minutes (12 each side).

  • Mitch K

    this really seems like the only thing id really want to happen to my body after i die.

  • SGforce

    Sweet, I thought you guys might like the idea :P

  • http://slowlyweblog.wordpress.com Cody

    *cough* TNOTB *cough*

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Sterner/1335958279 Andrew Sterner

      Nah, I read about this on woot.com last week, and seen it about on the internets long before.

      Considering the cost of a coffin these days, their rates aren’t much. and i know I want to be decapitated at death anyways, so having my head turned into “blood fire death” would make the afterlife so much more comforting a thought.

    • Monochrome Sound

      Actually, I saw this on Invisible Oranges a week or two ago…

    • http://thenumberoftheblog.com DemiGodRaven

      Be careful with comments like these. The blog-o-sphere winds up recycling a lot of information across a bunch of different sites so you never really know who saw this first. It’s much easier to just ignore stuff than act like we’re all in competition for scoops.

  • C Frazier

    I heard about this a few weeks ago on NPR and it sounded funny hearing Diane Reem (I know her name has a different spelling) talk about it with her old ass senior voice.

  • Heathens Heretic

    Sweet tits, this kinda sounds like an album collection a serial killer would start

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sara-Petrocelli/519197405 Sara Petrocelli

    That’s my goal when I die. I’m putting it in my will.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Gabriel-Nott/832588640 Gabriel Nott

    thats fucking metal.