Scraping Genius Off The Wheel

THE AUTOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION

  • Gary Suarez
30

THE AUTOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION

Two Saturdays ago, I, along with less than 100 onlookers, caught Bailter Space’s reunion show at Bowery Ballroom. This past Monday, I witnessed Knot Feeder (ex- Don Caballero), supported by the youthful and tuneful Tropic Of Nelson and the atonal yet bass-driven Gods and Queens, and was dismayed at the low turnout. What’s wrong with you, New York City? I thought we were cool.

Here’s your noise news…

Danny DeVito: Small Man, Big Band
If you’ve ever experienced the organized chaos of Fantomas or the riffgasmic sludge of Melvins in their respective live settings, then brace yourself for the cataclysmic meeting of these two unstoppable behemoths–in the comfort of your living room! Last week, Ipecac released an enticingly low priced DVD of the so-called Fantomas Melvins Big Band in concert at the Kentish Town Forum in London. Recorded on May 1, 2006, the set includes tracks from the collaborative Millennium Monsterwork record alongside instantly
recognizable cuts from both acts, including a few off the classic Houdini album. Players include Mike Patton, Buzz Osbourne, Dale Crover, Dave Lombardo and Trevor Dunn, and the round plastic disc features a commentary track filled out by some of the usual suspects… and, for some bizarre fucking reason, Danny DeVito too!

I Miss You, Captain Caveman
Unga bunga, overgrown grown-ups. Want to satisfy your creepy love for toys and your bloodthirst for acid punk rock – at the same time? Well then, Triclops! has the answer for you with a totally freakin’ neat NOIZE TOY. On the surface, it looks like a plastic version of either a hairless three-eyed caveman or your retarded three-eyed cousin. But deep down inside its handy club lies the band’s entire Out Of Africa album along with bonus videos and extras, all accessible via USB. Even with a limited run of a mere 50 pieces, the $75 price tag is a bit rich for my blood alcohol, but what the hell do I know? As the CD goes the way of the dinosaur, I look forward to more quirky gimmicks like this to promote music.

“Our Band Is Not For Sale”
Justin of The Austerity Program has something to say to those jerks in Russian Circles.
Apparently, they had an agreement, and someone broke it.


Plowed To Death
If you live in or near Madison, WI, I’m so sorry for you. At least, I would be if I didn’t know that Killdozer are playing a hometown reunion gig there on September 20th at the High Noon Saloon. Fortunately for those of us who aren’t Badgers fans, I’ve just learned (nod to Black Bubblegum) that this is part of a mini-tour with shows in Los Angeles, San Francisco, Baltimore, New York, and Austin’s Fun Fun Fun Fest, the latter of which has a lineup so sick that it’s terminally ill and asking for last rites.

Why Haven’t You Heard Of GODS AND QUEENS?
If you’re like me (read: old), then you know that if you’re going to keep going to see concerts, you need to start carrying protection other than that condom decomposing in your wallet. I forget to bring earplugs to gigs about half the time, forcing me to have to buy more at drugstore chains. For Gods and Queens, who
opened for the aforementioned Knot Feeder gig the other day, I realized too late and decided to brace myself for the set. The guitar playing is ugly and brutish; the drums almost savage. But GOD DAMN that bass. Underneath the scraping and howling of Jamie Getz and above the pounding of Robin Fowler was Ben Rosysdon, an unassuming young man who laid down such sinfully melodic (and often complex) basslines. Their MySpace features a scant single song, but a full-length album on Robotic Empire seems imminent this Fall.

Until next time: let your lifestyle determine your deathstyle.

-GS

Gary Suarez is gonna gitcha! He also writes for Brainwashed and just barely manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No.

Show Comments
Metal Sucks Greatest Hits