IRON MAIDEN DRUMMER’S SPANK-BANK IS NOW FULL
When word reached Lady Gaga last year that she’d been described by Ozzy Osbourne as “very clever, very interesting,” “wacky,” and in possession of a likable zaniness, the pop singer expressed her joy by calling herself Black Sabbath’s biggest fan “in the world.” Um, yeah that’s a patent and insulting falsehood, but shit, no worries cuz flattery from an icon like Ozzy might lead to excited overstatement in response. Shit, I’d be fuckin’ pumped if Bill Ward and I liked the same cereal. So yeah.
And really it’d even be spazworthy for most if similar praise came from somebody like Monster Magnet maestro Dave Wyndorf, as it did for Lady Gaga on MetalSucks back in November. Though hmm I doubt she was similarly flattered by an aged metal drummer fop’s invite to a groping, which occured this weekend when the Iron Maiden tour shared a venue with Lady Gaga’s in Tampa, Florida. A few days before that, McBrain told an about-to-be totally nauseated interviewer:
[Lady Gaga] is absolutely adorable! I threw out an invite. If she wants to learn to play drums, she could sit on my knee and we could talk …
Gross. The happy news is that Lady Gaga was happy to trade profitable exposure to open-minded metal people (there’s this pic too) for a squeamish moment with a pervy old stick-grabber. That’s just good sense. So bam we have the photo above. Judging from his expression, I’d say we”re lucky that she talked McBrain down from ‘sitting on his knee’ to ‘standing on his foot.’
Iron Maiden is on tour now and successfully adapting to Nicko McBrain’s constant and conspicuous boner.