Moppet Metal

This Baby Sure Does Love Maximum the Hormone

  • Axl Rosenberg

PARENTS: having a hard time getting your baby to stop crying? Does the lil’ tyke not respond to lullabies, cutesy voices, stuffed animals, warm milk, rides in the car, sessions atop the washing machine, or chloroform?

Fret not! The gloriously weird Maximum the Hormone, Japan’s #1 endorser of artificial vaginas, are here to help! Their music instantly soothes even the most inconsolable child! Don’t believe us? Just watch!

See? It works perfectly! And best of all, you now have assurances that your baby will someday practice safe sex. Because it’s very hard to get an STD from a plastic pussy.

Thanks: Zeeshan

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