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Br00tal-lists

HASID IN THE MOSHPIT!

 Friday, April 24th, 2009 at 12:45pm by

kse moshpit hasidWhen @AlishaThrashion tweeted from the Music As a Weapon tour stop in New Jersey on Wednesday that there was a Hasid in the moshpit, I responded with what any skeptical Jew like myself would: “pics or it didn’t happen.” And within a few minutes, I had the above in my inbox.

Pretty awesome (moshpit dude, if you’re reading this — you rule). Metal knows no religious boundaries! So I got to thinkin’… what are some funny Music As A Weapon-related puns we can connect to Jewish themes? (For those who don’t know, your editors are Jewish, so we can make these jokes guilt-free). Bands on the tour are Disturbed, Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira. Examples:

Gifiltefish Engage
The Impossibility of Kvetching
Alice or Just Shvitzing
Down With the 10 Plagues

Winner gets some cool posters and stickers in the mail. Go!

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  • metalgf

    Killschmutz Engaged
    As Shabbas Ends
    Chimtorah
    Lacuna Tallis

  • Mike

    Lacuna Coil- “Shvamped”
    The Impossibility of Shvitzing
    David Drainmanaschevitz

  • ferris

    Lacuna Oy!-il?

    “Gifiltefish Engage”!! I’m a gentile, but I always (respectfully) switched up lyrics from the Geto Boys’ “My Mind is Playing Tricks on me” — “This year, Chaunukkah fell on a weekend / Me and Geto Boys went trick or treatin’ / Robbin’ little kids for Gifiltefish.”

  • d.o.g.o.b.g.y.n.

    The End Of Hannukah
    Lacuna Goyim
    Shiksas In The Gold Room
    Matzacode
    As Daylight Ryes
    Ten Thousand Shvitzes
    Power Bris
    The Circumsizing Process
    Briskets Of The Dead
    A Blintz Farewell
    Droppin’ Bagels

  • john

    wtf am i supposed to be looking at.

    • TWOAF

      I was thinking the same thing.

      • Beered

        Same here.

        • metalguy

          here too

          • groverXIII

            This.

          • Joe

            i guess your powers of jew-duction aren’t as well trained as Metalsucks. But in all fairness, I can’t see a fucking thing either.

            And oh yeah

            Heschel and Hell
            Bagel Decapitation
            Matzodon

  • http://www.myspace.com/orchids Daisy May Tinklepants

    The Bitter Dist-Herbs
    Music as a Hamantashen
    A Bid Shalom
    10,000 Goyem

  • Bam

    Holy Goyem

  • metalstinks

    pure hatred of bagels
    the jew inside
    as christ dies

  • Sacajawea

    Bristurbed
    Torahcode
    Ten-thousand Shvitz
    Music as a Whippin’
    Woody Allen Engage

  • http://www.metalinsider.net Bram

    Chimatzoh
    Lacuna Moyle!
    David Dreidel
    Down With the Shvitzness

    be back later with more.

    • metalguy

      david dreidel was mine fucker!!

      • http://www.metalinsider.net Bram

        my bad. that’s what i get for not looking. it is genius tho!

        • metalguy

          nono i meant i was gunna say it but you got it first

  • Patton

    Kosher Corpse

    • Patton

      The above comment has nothing to do with the bands on the tour but I always wanted to write this.

      • Joe

        shit, i didn’t understand the rules either. oh well.

  • jamie

    I’m sorry, who was in the pit and where exactly is he/she/it located?

  • Z

    “Pics or it didn’t happen?” Ah. See what you did there.
    Anyways, a good setlist for Killschvitz Engage would be:

    My Last Shalom
    Fixation on the Matzoh
    A Bid Farewell (to Egypt)
    Rose of Moses
    The Arms of Seder
    The End of Hannukah

  • PrayForPlagues

    Distreisand.

    • PrayForPlagues

      Ten Thousand Bris’s

  • Mike

    Shvitztina Scabbia
    40 Years in the Desert.

    I’m running out of ideas here.

  • Malacoda

    Lajewna Coil
    Matzos as a Weapon

  • Austin Millbarge

    MoishaHead
    Yarmaluketallica
    Matzodeth
    Ohvey Malmsteen
    Judas Bris
    Zimmermans Hole

    • bradican

      i vote moishahead for the win

  • http://www.burgerconquest.com Rev

    This is a load of bubbkis. Someone get me a Knish Engage from LaYonah SchCoil.

  • Austin Millbarge

    Ah, So what if I didn’t read the whole post, Big deal, You wanna fight about it!

  • thehumanthumb

    Dreidel of Filth

  • http://nyghtowl.livejournal.com Paul

    ur are Disturbed, Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira. Examples:

    Presenting: The Kvetching as a Blessing Tour
    Featuring:
    Disturbed that you’re eating shellfish!
    Kvetch-shvitz’n Goyim
    Lacuna Moyl
    Chametz

    All four bands will be covering “Creeping Death”.

  • yanky

    theose chassidim are my friends
    dave draimin gave them a shoutout in middle of the gig

  • josh

    Yo, I was one of the Hasidim in the pit!!! There were actually a couple of us there. We were even surfin’, ‘Twas awesome!!!!!

    P.S. And yes, there are Hasidim that listen to metal!

    • Nate

      yo Josh! it’s Nate. Sorry I couldn’t attend, sucks for me hu? had I know’n Dave had a shoutout in mind you would have had another CHASSID in the crowd!!!!! :))

  • josh

    Oh, I’ll give some too,

    David Draikup
    Techina Voil
    Killshmitz Engage
    Chimairen
    Music as I’m Shleppen

  • josh

    here is the video where David Draiman gives a shout out to the Hasidic Jews packed into the front row.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmA7pvyDlu0

  • steve

    i was one of the chasidim in the pit and itfukin rocked