HASID IN THE MOSHPIT!
Friday, April 24th, 2009 at 12:45pm by Vince Neilstein
When @AlishaThrashion tweeted from the Music As a Weapon tour stop in New Jersey on Wednesday that there was a Hasid in the moshpit, I responded with what any skeptical Jew like myself would: “pics or it didn’t happen.” And within a few minutes, I had the above in my inbox.
Pretty awesome (moshpit dude, if you’re reading this — you rule). Metal knows no religious boundaries! So I got to thinkin’… what are some funny Music As A Weapon-related puns we can connect to Jewish themes? (For those who don’t know, your editors are Jewish, so we can make these jokes guilt-free). Bands on the tour are Disturbed, Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira. Examples:
Gifiltefish Engage
The Impossibility of Kvetching
Alice or Just Shvitzing
Down With the 10 Plagues
Winner gets some cool posters and stickers in the mail. Go!
Killschmutz Engaged
As Shabbas Ends
Chimtorah
Lacuna Tallis
Lacuna Coil- “Shvamped”
The Impossibility of Shvitzing
David Drainmanaschevitz
Lacuna Oy!-il?
“Gifiltefish Engage”!! I’m a gentile, but I always (respectfully) switched up lyrics from the Geto Boys’ “My Mind is Playing Tricks on me” — “This year, Chaunukkah fell on a weekend / Me and Geto Boys went trick or treatin’ / Robbin’ little kids for Gifiltefish.”
The End Of Hannukah
Lacuna Goyim
Shiksas In The Gold Room
Matzacode
As Daylight Ryes
Ten Thousand Shvitzes
Power Bris
The Circumsizing Process
Briskets Of The Dead
A Blintz Farewell
Droppin’ Bagels
wtf am i supposed to be looking at.
I was thinking the same thing.
Same here.
here too
This.
i guess your powers of jew-duction aren’t as well trained as Metalsucks. But in all fairness, I can’t see a fucking thing either.
And oh yeah
Heschel and Hell
Bagel Decapitation
Matzodon
The Bitter Dist-Herbs
Music as a Hamantashen
A Bid Shalom
10,000 Goyem
Holy Goyem
pure hatred of bagels
the jew inside
as christ dies
Bristurbed
Torahcode
Ten-thousand Shvitz
Music as a Whippin’
Woody Allen Engage
Chimatzoh
Lacuna Moyle!
David Dreidel
Down With the Shvitzness
be back later with more.
david dreidel was mine fucker!!
my bad. that’s what i get for not looking. it is genius tho!
nono i meant i was gunna say it but you got it first
Kosher Corpse
The above comment has nothing to do with the bands on the tour but I always wanted to write this.
shit, i didn’t understand the rules either. oh well.
I’m sorry, who was in the pit and where exactly is he/she/it located?
“Pics or it didn’t happen?” Ah. See what you did there.
Anyways, a good setlist for Killschvitz Engage would be:
My Last Shalom
Fixation on the Matzoh
A Bid Farewell (to Egypt)
Rose of Moses
The Arms of Seder
The End of Hannukah
Distreisand.
Ten Thousand Bris’s
Shvitztina Scabbia
40 Years in the Desert.
I’m running out of ideas here.
Lajewna Coil
Matzos as a Weapon
MoishaHead
Yarmaluketallica
Matzodeth
Ohvey Malmsteen
Judas Bris
Zimmermans Hole
i vote moishahead for the win
This is a load of bubbkis. Someone get me a Knish Engage from LaYonah SchCoil.
Ah, So what if I didn’t read the whole post, Big deal, You wanna fight about it!
Dreidel of Filth
ur are Disturbed, Killswitch Engage, Lacuna Coil and Chimaira. Examples:
Presenting: The Kvetching as a Blessing Tour
Featuring:
Disturbed that you’re eating shellfish!
Kvetch-shvitz’n Goyim
Lacuna Moyl
Chametz
All four bands will be covering “Creeping Death”.
theose chassidim are my friends
dave draimin gave them a shoutout in middle of the gig
Yo, I was one of the Hasidim in the pit!!! There were actually a couple of us there. We were even surfin’, ‘Twas awesome!!!!!
P.S. And yes, there are Hasidim that listen to metal!
yo Josh! it’s Nate. Sorry I couldn’t attend, sucks for me hu? had I know’n Dave had a shoutout in mind you would have had another CHASSID in the crowd!!!!! :))
Oh, I’ll give some too,
David Draikup
Techina Voil
Killshmitz Engage
Chimairen
Music as I’m Shleppen
here is the video where David Draiman gives a shout out to the Hasidic Jews packed into the front row.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmA7pvyDlu0
i was one of the chasidim in the pit and itfukin rocked