VERY LIKELY THE WORST METALLICA COVER I’VE EVER HEARD
Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009 at 11:30am by Axl RosenbergI don’t know who you are, Stefanie Heinzmann, but give yourself a big ol’ pat on the back. You’ve managed to make Avril Lavigne look like Chuck Schulinder. I’d rather listen to Attack Attack! cover Katy Perry, fer Chrissakes.
I’m saying this sucks.
MS Maniac Charlie Famer sent this to us, and claims that it was a big hit in Switzerland last year. Assuming that’s true, I’d just like to take this moment to say suck it, Switzerland.
-AR
FUCK.
turrrible
Well, they get a +1 for trying to do something different with the song, and a -1000 on the execution. That sucked.
Seconded.
I would venture to say this is the worst ive ever heard
…chicks hot though Ide boink that
Nah, she’s not hot, you’ll do better.
long as she keeps her fucking mouth shut
When it kicked in, it felt like I was suffering from a stroke.
I really wasn’t expecting it to kick in like that! Got to say, it made me laugh…
Do not use Chucks name in vain.
That’s right, Chuckdamnit.
Wow, that was bad.
Only a little better than the original.
+1
I think I just contracted swine flu from watching that.
isn’t it Chuck Schuldiner not Schulinder?
Yes it is.
I think they were trying to “Jewize” his name.
Pretty sure Schuldiner already is a Jewish name…
Exactly.
the only chuck that matters is the one with the last name Norris
Better than Unforgiven II
And Unforgiven III.
Weird
Why the fuck is there a band in the video??? This must be a remix of the original remake, or something… or… just, fuck Switzerland. Or fuck this skank, fuck it, fuck both.
According to Metallica their suit against Napster wasn’t about money but rather control of their own music. I specifically recall Lars saying he didn’t want to wind up hearing Enter Sandman in a toothbrush commercial. So, if fear of having your music bastardized was the great motivator why not stop garbage like this?
Because you can’t stop someone doing their own version of your song. You can stop samples, but not new recordings. Sure Hetfield and Ulrich won’t object to publishing income however…
the song’s not as bad as the video.
I kind of liked it. I felt like I was watching Scooby Doo.
I lol’d.
this fucking rules. I’d rather listen to this amy winehouse rip off than the real song any day.
Switzerland brought us Eluveitie though, so I’ll let them off this time…
Damn right
Probably would do better covering other songs. Not a bad voice. Goofy video.
She’s also got the hot librarian thing going on with the glasses.
“She’s also got the hot librarian thing going on with the glasses.”
Yep, that’s about the only good thing. The Unforgiven is far from my favorite Metallica tune, but jezus… that was horrible.
yep this was pretty big in all of northern europe.
just found another reason to Cobain myself!
I liked it. Very much
Actually this really isn’t that bad, anyway.
With the first 5 seconds of intro, it sounded like it might stay somewhat true to the original. But then the poppy, sorta syncopated funk-pop guitar caused a reaction deep within my bowels.
amen, brother.
I love it
And a great touch with the phantom guitars. Sorry to see Hetfield has really let himself go….
For some reason the link doesn’t show up on the page so I found it myself. Errr…that’s 45 seconds of my life I’ll never get back.
Most metal non-metal video ever. Couldn’t you feel the emotion when she kicked the chair over?
thanks for ruining my month.
Hmm – this is making me rethink doing a jazz-funk version of Immortal’s “Pure Holocaust”.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Her voice sounds really close to Katy Perry’s. Your reference seemed appropriate.
Is this the Swiss equivalent of Miley Cyrus? Cuz I’d be pretty pissed if someone like that did something like this?
by the way, this shit comes straight outta kartoffelland (read: germany) so don’t blame switzerland.
The girl is from Switzerland, she got famous in Germany.
Didn’t Krokus also come from Switzerland? And Swiss Beats, too.
Swiss Miss does, too. Although NOBODY fucks with the Swiss Miss.
I still like this better than the black album. The kid in the video pisses me off. I seriously hate him.
what the fuck was his problem? sitting in his chair like that
I would agree that this is one of the worst covers i’ve heard….but i would still rather listen to this then attack attack..
pretty cute.
she is
that was funny as shit
I wish they just quit when Cliff died then we wouldn’t have crap like this
raged @ 0:21
Well, lyric “that old man here is me” suits her the best.
It was catchy.
Now i want Metallica to cover “Never gonna give you up”.
Hetfield would have to add all the yeahs and whoas and hoohahs they could put it on the next cover album and call it Garbage Inc.
Then you get my point.
I wonder when they’re writing their lyrics if they actually write down the “yeahs, whoos, and hoohahs…and even the heys”. That shit is so annoying.
Not exactly what you wanted, but as close as you’ll ever get:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN75im_us4k
Wow, the guitar in the beginning sounds so fucking awful, and digital.
Also, fuck you people. the Black Album is great.
It is if you see it as a new start. No sarcasm, it is.
SCHULDINER YOU FOOLS
Whoa! Where did hell did that come from? the intro was tolerable but them the dance beats kicked in and i felt like stabbing my ears with a knitting needle.
Where’s Tori Amos when you need her?
Stepping back and listening to it with unbiased ears… this wasn’t that bad. If it weren’t a cover, there wouldn’t of been this big stink about it… it’s all because its a cover that no one likes it.
exacta-fucking-ly
The only crossover between metal and something electronic that i found at times pleasing was Infected Mushroom.
i’m still undecided on whether or not this is brilliant or complete shit.
eh… i dunno… Van Canto’s cover of “Battery” is pretty god awful!
Here’s proof, if you guys don’t know what i’m talking about:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEwNrjvNiYs
This isn’t bad actually… it’s just not what you expect from a Metallica cover. I kind of… dare I say it… like it. I mean, it’s not great and it’s not as good as the original but I can’t really shit on it and say it sucks. It’s an interesting take on the song.
Awwwww, c’mon, guys! I’m from germany. We just thought we’ld have gotten rid of this… and now you remind us of this! Gosh!
somebody or something beats this girl….badly…..
When I first read this I was at work, in a PC without an audio output.
Now I saw the 1st minute of this shit………oh my god, this has raised the bar for complete suckiness.
That was a joke right, one of those mash ups. Please god let it be
That was an extremely shitty cover. Really…
This cover is better than any Van canto’s cover
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9LaB9dq4Rw
I prefer that over this; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmKz7_Wb2fQ
At least the Van Canto one is original in some way.
What the fuking this shit !!!!
Please RESPECT MetallicA !
Delete this record !!!!
You know, at this point even Metallica covering Metallica is horrible to listen to. Dave Mustaine can actually sing better than James Hetfield now, which means he’s now 100% more awesome instead of 99%.
Rocktallica wrote his song…how many times do I have to tell you fucks…metallica broke up when cliff died. period. No Cliff No Metal…
Fucking thing SUCKS.
Id hit that, then i would slap the fuck out of it for that shit cover =/
Peanut butter slap! (thanks Dane Cook)
lolwat?
I’d listen to this over Unforgiven II and III
I lol’d hard. Then I wondered what everyone was giving out about. I like this.
This is toe tappin.’
The sad thing is, she can sing better than Hetfield. More attractive too. I honestly thought there was no guitar playing in the entire song until the end.
it’s pretty cheesy but could have been worse.
you can see lars try to suck up to her in an interview (no joke):
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=42892545&searchid=1eedbdad-6505-4e9f-b344-a80009923d2c
I really wanted to slap that fucking kid, trying to look all cute or some shit. No, not slap, kick his fucking nose into his skull…
Obviously this is way better then the original ´cuz Metallica ain´t in the video. I´d rather see a semi hot chick do so so music then Metallica do anyting at all. In my opinion we´ve reached the point in history when the output of shit Metallica has canceled out the releases of legendary Metallica.
Holy FUCK! Don’t ever do that to me again!