The once-great Zakk Wylde and has recorded a new version of “Iron Man” with William Shatner, the Canadian sex symbol and star of National Lampoon’s Loaded Weapon 1. Wylde had nothing to do with the creation of the original “Iron Man,” of course, but he does know Ozzy Osbourne, so it’s appropriate. It’s a real thing.

ANYWAY, in-the-studio footage of this blessed event has now surfaced (above). You get to hear Wylde do lots of guitar squeals, but that’s about as uncommon as taking a breath, so it’s not really the good part of this video. No no no no no no no. The good part of this video comes around the :58 second mark, when Shatner tries to direct Wylde’s performance thusly:

“Finally, he’s dying… and this is like hell for him… he is dying in hell. Now, if that adds any character to what you’re playing… if it becomes more stark, more hell…”

Wylde initially just “Yes, Dear”s Shatner with a simple “Okay,” then cracks a joke to basically change the topic. In other words, no, Billy, that information will not add any character to Wylde’s playing, it will not make it more stark, it will not make it “more hell.”

Shatner’s other directing credits include Star Trek V, which is the one where they look for God with Spock’s long lost brother, and Groom Lake, a 2002 direct-to-video sci-fi movie co-starring the always-dashing Dick Van Patten. So it’s kind of amazing that he wasn’t able to gently move Wylde towards a more nuanced, profound performance.

-AR

[via Metal Injection]