Metal in the Media

Ted Nugent Was on Piers Morgan, Seemed Very Intelligent

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Ted Nugent went on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight, the subject of discussion being, duh, guns. Please allow me to summarize the segment for you:

First, Piers Morgan proves, with one incredibly scary video of the same weapon used in the last five mass shootings, that semi-automatic weapons are most definitely NOT “just like a musket,” the way Nugenteers such as Fiver Finger Death Punch’s Zoltan Bathory claim. Morgan fires off about twenty-five rounds in approximately seven seconds without ever stopping to re-load.

Ted, subsequently, presents his counter-argument, which includes all of the following points:

  • Guns are fun.
  • People who don’t like guns “will never understand.”
  • Guns statistics are bullshit, because they include “bad guys” shot by the police and home invaders shot by home inhabitants.
  • “99.99% of gun owners in America are wonderful people” will never use these weapons for violent crimes, but our liberal, sissy “Scammer-in-Chief” (that would be President Obama, in case it isn’t obvious) thinks that “to save one life would be worth” banning these weapons anyway, since the few people who do use them for violent crimes will kill a lot of innocent human beings. As if that mattered!
  • “We have a mad man problem in America,” not a gun problem in America.
  • Even though we should figure out whose these mad men are and take care of ’em, we should not enact background checks in order to purchase guns, because “the government doesn’t need to know who’s got what.”
  • The more people own guns and ammo, the safer America will be: “An armed society is a polite society.”
  • Fuck Yemen.
  • Fuck Mexico.
  • Fuck Japan.

By the way, Nugent is the first, and only, member of this two-man debate to ever raise his voice, which I think is pretty telling… dude is just incapable of having a calm, rational discussion.

But if we pretend that he is capable of having a calm, rational discussion, I think his main argument kinda-sorta might boil down to, “This is a mental health issue, not a gun issue.” Which is valid, so long as you don’t consider how many countries with more stringent gun control laws have so many fewer shooting deaths than the U.S.

And, seriously, it is SO GROSS to say the lives of people killed by these weapons aren’t worth taking them off the market. Words cannot express the ways in which that sentiment makes my skin crawl.

Watch if you dare:

Thanks: Billy Bob Hornton

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