Hipsters Out Of Metal!


  • Anso DF

Spurred by a lazy crossword clue in The Onion (36 down, four letters: “Faith No More’s only hit”), MetalSucks contributor Anso DF dedicates every single day in August to celebration and exploration of the San Francisco alt-metal greats. Here we prove that history’s greatest band landed more than one commercial hit (crossword answer: “Epic” natch), we revel in FNM’s embarrassing wealth of winning album tracks (themselves often fit for chart topping), and we dip into the staggering best of the b-sides (ditto). Along the way, we survey the context of FNM’s big break (amid similarly seminal acts Jane’s Addiction, Nine Inch Nails, and Ween) to the post-Nevermind, panic-based recording industry in which the brilliantly versatile, fearless powerhouse band operated until their 1998 demise. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it.


Song “The Real Thing”

Written by Patton (L); Gould, Bottum (M)

Released 1989

Appears on The Real Thing album duh

Produced by Matt Wallace

Guitars by Jim Martin

Key lyric “It’s right there all by itself/And what you are, there is nothing else.”

Single? No.

The climate That dude Joseph Fisher talked about this over at PopMatters: It’s a struggle to describe and contextualize Faith No More. If forced, I can offer that their distant older cousins are Fishbone, Killing Joke, and Black Sabbath. Curve was maybe a younger cousin. But these connections are more philosophical than practical, right? So I think that the context for The Real Thing is that there was no context. As of June 1989, for loud music fans there was radio rock, hair metal, thrash metal, and Faith No More. See: “The Real Thing.”

Awesome song elevated to supra-awesomeness by the composition, arrangement, performance, production, mix, mastering, and placement “The Real Thing.” The song is a highlight reel. It’s what we all seek in art. It justifies the invention of recorded music like free porn validates the entire internet age. It’s why we listen. This is what it is all about.

Didja know? On the cassette version of The Real Thing, “Zombie Eaters” and “The Real Thing” were separated by “The Edge Of The World.” This is notable as FNM’s only track order mistake ever.




15 “The Real Thing”

14 “Malpractice” (read)

13 “Ugly In The Morning” (read)

12 “The Cowboy Song” (read)

11 “Helpless” (read)

10 “Smaller And Smaller” (read)

9 “Digging The Grave” (read)

“From Out Of Nowhere” (read)

“Last Cup Of Sorrow” (read)

6 “The Gentle Art Of Making Enemies” (read)

“Caffeine” (read)

“Falling To Pieces” (read)

“Stripsearch” (read)

2 ”Ricochet” (read)

1 ”Land Of Sunshine” (read)

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